Twilight OneShots
by DaemonicKitten
Summary: Basically a collection of one-shots based off the popular books/movies with my own personal additions/perspectives. Edward/Bella pairing
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer** : I don't own it. Trust me, if I owned Edward, I wouldn't be sitting on my arse, _writing_ about him. I'd be living Bella's life. :D

**Summary** : Basically a collection of one-shots based off the popular books/movie(s) with my own personal additions/perspectives. Each will probably be themed, which could be a scene from one of the books/ movie(s), an aspect of Bella/Edward/Jacob, etc. Most one-shots will be posted randomly and more or less unrelated (other than the fact they are from the same books/movie(s)).

And yes, I know, the Title sucks. Sorry, couldn't think up anything else.

**Note** : MAY be OOC in places. Will NOT be exactly like the books/movie(s), since I don't know _everything_ off by heart. Maybe have mixed up information... Maybe just...consider it AU? I'll also try to put if it's related to a movie scene, book scene, and which book/movie.

**Pairings** : Mainly Edward/Bella. Maybe hints of Jacob/Bella. Some sides of Alice/Jasper, and possibly fainter hints of Rosalie/Emmett, Carlisle/Esme.

**Rating** : 'T' for language and any minor graphic scenes.

**Legend**:

"Speaking"

_Thoughts_

_**Messages**_

**Flashbacks/Dreams/Visions**

**(Scene/POV Changes)**

My idea of how the field trip SHOULD have gone. Not that it was bad, but... I would have preferred the blood-typing to the greenhouse. Again, not all lines/quotes will be the same.

**Book** : a cross of the book and the movie Twilight.

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**(School)**

"Alright everyone, let's go, let's go." Mr. Banner was crowding the students on to the two waiting school buses.

Standing by my red truck, I felt my heart racing as I looked down at the bits of tail light that remained. It was all that was left of my near-death experience, the day before. Well, that and the big dent in the back end of my truck. I stood with my backpack slung over one shoulder, and my hands at my sides, trying to make sense of it all.

**Flashback**

I walked to my truck with a sigh, trying to figure out the mystery that was Edward Cullen. I was so confused by his hot and cold attitude. One minute he's freaking out and glaring at me for reasons I can't even begin to fathom. The next, he's politely introducing himself, and talking to me like any other person. Wait, no, that's not right. The others... Mike, Jessica, Eric... They'd seemed so overly enthusiastic about me, that somehow it didn't feel right. It felt...fake, maybe? Or forced? Edward; when he spoke to me, he actually looked _interested_ in what I had to say. It was very strange...and a little unnerving.

Either way, after our talk, he walked me to my locker, and I'd asked him about his eyes. They had been black only a few days before, and now they seemed a deep golden color. I was so sure he was wearing contacts, but when I asked him about it he seemed to panic. He'd reacted oddly and rushed off with a lame and obviously made up excuse about florescence. I mean sure, florescence can chance the _shade_ of someone's eyes, but they can't make someone's eyes appear as black as his had been, that day.

I stuffed my backpack on the hood of my truck and stopped. I felt as if someone was watching me, and I stiffened up, looking over my shoulder to see who it was. I looked around the parking lot, ignoring all the students who wandered around. Then I saw it. Edward was standing against his car, facing me and staring at me like I was some sort of frustrating puzzle he was intent on figuring out.

I turned away after a moment, feeling my face heat up. I resumed looking through my backpack to make sure I had everything. Suddenly, there was a loud screech. At first I was certain it was someone messing around, and I hesitated a moment. The screech got louder, and I turned to see what it was. A blue van was speeding towards me, out of control. I saw Tyler behind the wheel, trying to swerve away with horrified eyes.

I couldn't move as the van barreled towards me. I was panicked and frozen, unable to even feel my legs. My heart pounded, and I managed to press myself further against my truck. Vaguely, I was aware of people screaming my name, including a beautiful voice I'd have loved to hear more often. It took me a few moments to identify it as Edward.

I was knocked out of the way at the last second by something hard. I felt the air get knocked right out of me, and my head hit the pavement.

Everything had been a blur up to that point. I was aware of things, but they weren't really registering at the time. The van was still coming, and I was on the ground. There was a cold pressure around my waist -an arm?- and I stared in shock at dark honey eyes. They flashed away and there was a loud crunch, along with the sound of metal grating on metal. Looking away, myself, I noticed the van had stopped.

First, I noticed his hand. There was a huge dent in the door of Tyler's van, and Edward's hand was in the middle. Then, I noticed his eyes. They were on me again, filled with so many mixed emotions. Anger, fear, concern, shock... My mind struggled to make sense of everything, but his proximity to me threw off my mental processes. His mouth opened and shut a few times, as if he wanted to say something, but couldn't make the words come out.

The screaming started.

Edward stayed there for what felt like forever, but then with a flash, he was gone. I barely noticed him hopping over my truck with ease, even as people began to rush around Tyler's van and help me to my feet, screaming my name and asking over and over if I was alright. Even Tyler managed to climb over to the passenger window and look out, a gash on the side of his head as he begged my forgiveness and pleaded with me to tell him I was alright. I looked around, and saw Edward's family staring at the scene with clear disapproval.

Well, all but Alice. She seemed torn about something.

**End Flashback**

_I hit my head, huh?_ I thought darkly as I looked up and glanced around the parking lot. _Ok, so yeah, I did, but I _know_ what I saw!_ There, walking with Alice and Jasper, was Edward. _What _are_ you??_ It was as if he could sense my question, because he frowned and stared at me for a moment. He didn't look around, as if he felt my stare, but looked straight at me, as if he could read my mind. I thought I saw a hint of a warning glare in his face, but he quickly turned away and began talking to Alice.

"Hey, Bella."

I snapped out of my daze, turning to find Mike dancing up to me energetically. He began on about the miracle of my survival between two vehicles, and once again asked me what happened.

"Edward saved me." I stated, still staring at the said man. I caught that his talking stopped, and his head seemed cocked in my direction, and for a moment, I was _sure_ he could hear me. It was exactly as if he was specifically listening to our conversation. _But that's just...ridiculous....right?_ I mentally scolded myself. _So's stopping a van with his bare hands, and yet he somehow pulled _that_ off._

"I thought you said he was by his car, across the lot." Mike seemed confused.

Blinking, I looked away from Edward's breath taking face and hesitated. Lying wasn't my strong suit, but I'd told Edward I wouldn't say anything. I hadn't promised, but I valued it the same way, as if I had. "I... guess I remembered wrong." Besides, he was right. I couldn't just come out and say Edward stopped the van with his bare hand. He'd never believe me. Hell, _I_ was having a hard time believing me!

He nodded. "Um, well, I was wondering..."

I tuned him out and glanced over his shoulder, blinking in surprise to see Edward watching me in blatant confusion. I could only guess what he was thinking, and it was a little frustrating. I had so many questions I wanted to ask, but I was certain he'd never answer them.

"So? What do you think?"

Looking to Mike, I frowned. "About what?" For a split second, I felt bad for ignoring him, watching as his face fell. He repeated what he'd said about the dance, and that guilt faded away as a familiar sense of unease passed through me. "Prom?" He nodded. "Dancing..." I bobbed my head a little and looked away, down at the pavement. "Not a good idea for me." _Crap! Think fast, Bella!_ "I, uh, actually have plans that day, anyways. I'll be going to Jacksonville. Why don't you ask Jessica? I know she'd _love_ to go with you." I was looking at him again, trying to gauge his reaction.

Mike looked disappointed, but nodded and offered a weak answer. He glanced over to Jessica, who waved at him with a huge smile, and waved back at her.

"Get over here!" Mr. Banner yelled. "You, too." He stated, waving Edward and his brother and sister over. He began pointing to his badge and going on about green, and I sighed, tuning him out again as I walked over, leaving my thoughts behind me for a little while, at least.

**(Field Trip)**

I had no idea where we were going. I'd been so fixated on the near crash that I'd ignored the news about it, and what people said. I caught the words 'Blood Bank', a couple of times, so I was nervous, but I was sure I'd overheard something else. The bus ride was calm and relaxing. Angela sat next to me, and after a few quick answers to her questions, she happily left me alone, talking to Jessica about Prom.

When the buses finally stopped, I disembarked with the rest of the class, still not paying much attention to anything. At this point, my mind was on the hospital visit, and Dr. Cullen's strange reaction when I'd explained to him how Edward saved me. Not to mention, the strange argument I'd overheard with Rosalie. I knew they were hiding something. Apparently something big.

"Let's go check out the flower shop."

I snapped out of my thoughts, and watched Alice drag an uncomfortable Jasper behind her as they walked briskly over to a small flower shop, next door. I caught her smiling at him, and was pretty sure I saw a hint of something more laying underneath it. Worry, perhaps? She glanced at me briefly and offered a surer smile before turning back to Jasper. I was still looking in that direction as they entered the store, and I watched as Edward separated from our group to lean against the bus.

Feeling a tug on my hand, I turned to see Angela pulling me along with the rest of the class as we entered the building.

I glanced quickly and saw Edward watching me with a very intense stare. He saw my look and raised an eyebrow before quickly looking away. Still reclining against the side of the bus, he made no attempt to move, and I realized he was intending to skip the trip.

"Ugh, this is going to be so bad." Jessica groaned as we entered the building.

Immediately, I froze inside the door. The building smelled sanitized, like you'd get with a hospital. I looked around and noticed several people walking around. One man walked through the hall with a cart full of bags. I didn't need to be nearby to know what was in them, and I felt my face turn cold.

"Ok, so today we're going to be blood-typing." Mr. Banner explained as he led us beyond another door.

I was numb, walking with them, but lost in my mind. _Oh no! This is _so_ not happening!!_ The smell hit me, and I stopped breathing. _No, no, no!_ I felt my body tremble, and was glad Angela had let go of my hand, or she'd have felt it. As it was, I felt my legs turn to rubber, and my heart pounded almost painfully in my chest.

"We'll be finding out your blood types." He concluded, leading us up to a table covered with numerous unidentifiable objects.

I leaned against a -thankfully- close wall, and watched as he picked up a small machine that I recognized. When my grandmother had to have her blood checked, she used a similar machine to prick her finger. I couldn't watch as he took Mike's hand and pulled him close, but at the same time, I couldn't look away. He put the machine to Mike's index finger tip, instructing the class as he pressed a button, and pulled it away. I couldn't hear his words, they kept fading in and out. Then he proceeded to squeeze Mike's finger until a large bubble of blood appeared.

Everything spun, and I heard a hollow ringing in my ears. Everything seemed to fade away; the voices, the lights, the smell of blood. I couldn't even feel anything in my body. Next thing I know, I'm hearing Angela calling my name, and feeling warm hands slap my cheeks lightly.

"Ms. Swan, are you alright? Ms. Swan? Bella!" Mr. Banner was leaning over me with a concerned look.

I blinked and looked around, closing my eyes as I was hit with another dizzy spell. "Yeah." I muttered, feeling my cold face warm as I blushed at the weakness of my voice. It hit me then that I'd collapsed down the wall into a sitting position. "Um, I already know my blood type."

Mr. Banner stared at me a long moment before slowly nodding. He had a look in his eyes as if he knew what was going on. "Can someone take Ms Swan outside, please?"

I didn't have to look to know it was Mike who cheerfully volunteered. Everything was still spinning as a warm arm slid under my arm and pulled me up. "Keep your hand in your pocket." I muttered with a weak glare at him as he eagerly helped me outside.

The walk was quick, thankfully. The smell was so overwhelming, even over the scent of sanitizer, and then I was in the fresh air. I breathed deep, trying to rid myself of the disgusting scent of blood.

"Bella? What happened?" The musical voice was far away, at first. Then it seemed to be right at my side, making me jump. "Is she alright?" There was a slight cool pressure on my arm, briefly, but I didn't have the strength to open my eyes.

I kept my eyes closed and breathed in the fresh air, trying to get the feeling back in my legs. There was a smell in the air that I recognized from the day he'd saved me from the van. I guess it was his scent. I don't know why, but the sweet smell drove the last vestiges of the smell of blood out of my system. My legs felt stronger, but still very rubbery. I wasn't nauseous anymore, but still lightheaded and shaky.

"I don't know. I think she fainted. She didn't even prick her finger."

"And I don't intend to." I muttered darkly, pulling away and staggering over to the cold wall. I leaned against it and carefully slid into a sitting position, pulling my knees to my chest and resting my head on them. _Ugh, I _hate_ blood!_

"I'll take care of her from here." Edward stated with a chuckle, and I heard very soft footsteps coming in my direction.

"But I'm supposed to-"

"I've got it." The voice turned sterner, but I didn't have the strength to look up to see what kind of glare Edward was giving Mike.

I heard a weak mumble and heavier footsteps go back into the building.

"Are you alright?" Edward's voice was soft and full of concern. When I looked up at him, his eyes widened before he smirked. "Hm, I've never seen anyone turn so _green_ before."

I rolled my eyes and sighed as I closed them. "I hate the smell of blood." Opening my eyes again, I watched as Edward frowned with an intrigued look.

"Humans can't smell blood."

_Oh yes they can._ "It smells like rust...and salt." I grimaced and shuddered, swallowing heavily as I carefully stood up.

He still looked intrigued as he backed off a step. "Hm..." He raised his hands when I staggered, but as I caught myself, he quickly lowered them again. "So... What's in Jacksonville?"

I paused and stared at him a moment. "How'd you know about that?"

He shrugged. "Doesn't answer my question."

Raising an eyebrow, I crossed my arms over my chest. "Well, you don't answer any of mine." I watched as he nodded with a look that stated he was letting me win that one. "Are you going to tell me how you stopped the van?"

He nodded. "Yeah. I had...an adrenaline rush. It's very common. Happens all the time. You can google it, if you like."

I could hear the underlying sarcasm and rolled my eyes. _Smartass._ I had to bite my lip a moment to keep from spitting that thought out. "Cars are in Jacksonville. People, streets, stores, stuff."

He sighed and frowned as I turned and walked away. I didn't have to listen to hear his footsteps beside me. I knew he'd stay with me, even if I didn't know why. "Why does it matter to you??" I turned to glare at him and accidentally tripped over my own two feet.

He grabbed my arm and quickly righted me without any problem before letting go and pulling away like he'd been burned. "Watch where you walk." He hissed, his tone seemingly stuck between emotions. I didn't know whether he was worried or just angry. "It helps."

We walked in silence for a bit. I wanted to snap at him, but I couldn't bring up enough energy to stay mad long enough to think up something clever and witty. I wasn't sure what was on his mind, but as I glanced at his face now and then, out of the corner of my eye, I watched as he seemed to be warring with something on his mind.

He finally decided to speak. "Listen. I'm sorry if I'm being rude, but it's better this way." It almost sounded as if he'd chosen the words very carefully, and the look on his face was regretful and wary.

Suddenly I heard Jessica calling my name and turned to find her rushing over to us. She sent a nervous but excited look to Edward as she stepped between us, and he shot me a slightly pained look before turning and walking away. _Gee, thanks Jess._ I thought darkly, only half listening as she excitedly went on about Mike asking her to the prom.

The rest of the two hour trip seemed to slowly tick by, but before I knew it, everyone was stepping out of the buildings and getting ready to leave. First was Jasper who handed Alice a small flower as they quickly made their way back to the buses from the flower shop. Then Edward joined them, looking at me with a troubled expression. Then the rest of the class filed out and began boarding the buses.

I walked back from a few feet down the street and let Jessica go ahead of me. I saw Edward hesitate only a moment before quickly coming towards me. He stopped a few feet away and frowned. "We....shouldn't be friends." He stated quietly.

I could only stare at him a moment. _Well, it was hot before. It's about time for the cold._ I should have seen this coming. Thankfully most of the people were on the busses already, and we had this chance to talk alone. He kept acting like he was pushing me away, trying to keep me from.... From what? Finding out his big bad secret? Getting too close to him? I watched as he stared at me expectantly. "Too bad you didn't think of that earlier." I know my voice was harsh. His expression darkened, but I began walking and he moved aside for me, keeping pace as we walked up to the first bus. _He never should've... If he..._ "You know, you should have let that stupid van squash me. Would've saved you a lot of regret." I stated, spinning to face him as we stood at the front door of the closest bus.

He frowned for a moment before his eyes darkened. "What...?" Right before my eyes, they went from a dark honey to liquid onyx, and I felt a little nervous as he seemed ready to growl. "You think I regret saving you??" His tone was easily offended and mad.

I should have backed off. His eyes were black and he was clearly pissed. Part of my mind screamed at me to back off, but I was upset. I didn't understand him, despite wanting to. I wasn't angry, like I should have been. For some reason, I couldn't stay angry at him. I was hurt and confused. "I know you do." I hissed, trying to keep my feelings in check. "I just don't get..._why_."

His eyes narrowed and he took a step closer. He seemed to be fighting for control, even as he stared down into my eyes. "You don't know _anything_." He growled quietly, the warning clear in his voice.

I wanted to say something, but I sensed a presence beside me and turned to find Alice walking up with a big smile. "Hello. Are you riding on our bus?" I knew she could taste the tension in the air, but she regarded me with such an open, friendly smile.

"No." Edward practically spat the word as he backed up to the door. "Our bus is full." He didn't even look as he banged harshly on the door. As it opened, he spun from me and quickly climbed the steps, not looking back once.

I knew it wasn't the case; the bus very likely wasn't full, but my irritation had faded. I felt guilty for snapping at Edward like I had, but I was hurt. Why couldn't he be my friend? Was it something I did? Was it because I couldn't stand the smell of blood? Because I wouldn't leave well enough alone, with the van? I just didn't understand it. I saw Alice shoot me a concerned look, and didn't say anything as I turned and walked to the other bus. Quickly, and without looking back, I boarded the bus, and sat next to Jessica, only half listening as she gushed on about Prom.

He didn't want to be friends? Fine.

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Ok, so I left it with her being kind of hurt and offended, but if I kept going, I'd have to go into another chapter with a whole new theme. LOL.

Hope you like it.

Written December 10, 2008

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	2. Roses

Not really based off a book or movie; just a random drabble I literally dreamt of.

Ok, so my ideas are going between little burbles of randonmess, to themed stories (read Elizabeth's Thoughts to see what I mean), to actual scenes from the books/movie, so it's probably going to bounce around. I hope you enjoy it, anyways.

**JuseaPeterson** - Hello again. I hope things are well with you. :) Well, this is one of many ideas for that scene, that I had. I just seriously wished they could have done it for the field trip. It seems to stick closer to the book _and_ the movie, you know? It's ok, though. I liked the field trip. Notice I pointed out Alice getting a flower from Jasper? ;) LOL

I didn't want to post this one right away, but since I already hinted to it and it's one of my favorites... Here it is. :)

**Angel Wings 113** - I'm glad you like it. :)

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**(Bella's POV)**

As I walked through the Cullen garden, I was taken back by the numerous rose bushes, seemingly in full bloom. It was late in the year, but their garden was fresh and green anyways. I really shouldn't have been surprised, I guess. I walked down the small path while Edward tried to get a hold of Alice about something, and admired the stunning red and yellow roses.

No one else was home. Rosalie and Emmett were 'at college' as far as anyone knew. Esme was at a business meeting about restoring an old home. Carlisle was at the hospital, pulling a double shift. Alice and Jasper were 'hiking' as far as anyone knew; they were really hunting.

It was just Edward and me. Apparently, Alice had left him a note; I didn't catch what was written on it as he snatched it up. He just asked me to take a walk in the garden as he ran upstairs and pulled his cell phone out. I knew he was calling Alice, because I heard him growling her name before he disappeared. He obviously wasn't happy, and I sincerely hoped nothing was wrong.

So, that's what I did. I'd passed three red bushes, one yellow and one white bush when I came upon the end of the path. There were tons of other flowers, but they didn't catch my attention the way the roses did. I had just reached the edge of the forest behind their home, and there, in front of me, was a large bush of roses. The thing that caught my attention was that they weren't red, yellow or white, but seemingly a combination of the three.

No, I don't mean a bush with red roses, yellow roses and white roses. I mean a bush with tawny gold roses. They reminded me of the golden eyes of the Cullen family; inherited by their eating styles. Because they drank animal blood instead of human blood. At least…in my opinion. Have you ever _seen_ their eyes?

They didn't look real. The roses, that is; but then again, I could probably say the same thing about their eyes.

"Wow." I breathed softly as I walked forward. I crouched by the bush and hesitantly reached out. My hand shook as it got nearer the bush and I frowned a moment. I was afraid to touch the flowers and destroy them. Taking in the stunning roses, I sighed when my eyes landed on a small group of seven perfect roses with one sickly-looking one in the bunch. _Huh, isn't that ironic?_ I thought as my hand gingerly reached out to dance lightly over the seven perfect roses. _It's a perfect representation of my life._

Their petals were pristine, they looked like the epitome of health and beauty; they were pale gold, but there was not one spot on them anywhere. When I leaned forward, they smelled amazing.

I leaned back and looked at the bush. Compared to the seven perfect roses, all the others paled in color and beauty. My eyes once again landed on the sickly rose; it was the only sickly rose on the bush.

I leaned over to the small sickly rose. My fingers danced over that one, too, and I grimaced as two petals fell off. It wasn't as soft or pristine as the others; it looked like it was dying. _Yeah, definitely ironic._ I leaned forward and closed my eyes, expecting the rose to smell horrible.

It didn't.

It smelled more powerful and beautiful than all the other roses combined. Again, I winced. It was all too symbolic in my eyes.

Seven stunning vampires; seemingly perfect in every way. Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie, Esme, Carlisle…even Edward. They were all so perfect. They were the beautiful golden roses with no flaws and the pristine petals. Me, I was the sickly rose; I was the dying rose among the bunch. The one that didn't belong. I looked nothing like them, but I smelled so strongly to them.

Especially Edward.

My hand pushed past the flowers and to the stems. I wanted so badly to pluck that one flower and let the others shine without it drawing back from their beauty. I wanted to remove the eyesore. Instead, my hand caught on a thorn. "Ow!" I pulled back, keeping my hand out of my sight and breathing through my mouth as I stuck my hand in my pocket, and carefully pushed a couple of the rose heads out of my way with my other hand. I focused on what I was looking at, trying to ignore the sting in my hand.

There was a single thorn on one of the beautiful golden roses. It had a drop of my blood on it, and I stared at it, not sure what to make of it.

"It's protecting the other rose." Came a soft, musical voice from behind me.

I jumped, letting the roses slide together and watching how all seven of them reformed a circle around the small, sickly rose. They pressed in close, but for a moment, I wasn't struck as them trying to suffocate it, but trying to guard it closely. Rising slowly, I turned to find Edward staring at me with a sad look, even as his eyes bored into mine.

"What are you thinking?"

Swallowing against the sudden lump in my throat, I shrugged. _I was thinking how much like those roses we were_. "I just thought that rose could…" I bit my lip and looked away. "It doesn't really go with the others. It looks like it doesn't belong on the bush." A frown marred my face, I'm sure, but I was lost in thought. "It's so sickly compared to them."

"It belongs…" Edward seemed to hesitate, but only because he seemed to be trying to find the right words. "Where it wants to belong. It wants to be there with the others. It's a stubborn rose." He smiled his crooked smile and walked over. "And they want it there; they protect it, as I'm sure you noticed." He took my hand and pulled it out of my pocket, examining the small spot of now dried blood. "Are you ok?"

I nodded, feeling my throat tighten momentarily. "I've had worse." We both winced at that one, as I'm sure we both remembered James. "But…" I looked at the flowers and carefully pulled my hand away from him to crouch down again. Once again my hands drifted over the perfect roses. "It _doesn't_ belong. It just holds the others back and takes away from them."

"Bella…" I heard Edward sigh and turned to find him already crouching beside me. "You've already learned the other roses will protect it from danger." He stated easily, his eyes skipping right over the other roses as his fingers drifted ever so lightly against the sickly one. "And this rose has it's own beauty." He leaned in and sniffed it, a smile gracing his face even as he chuckled. "Have you _smelled_ it?"

My face burned hotly. "Yeah, well, smell can be a bad thing, too." I muttered, staring at the rose and still kind of wishing I could pull it out of the bunch.

"That depends. At first, I would have agreed with you, but now I'm not so sure." Edward reached beyond the flower heads and all of a sudden, one of the perfect golden roses seemed to jerk. Then, his hand came out of the bunch, and I saw the one rose with the single thorn on it.

"Edward!" I cried, staring at him in shock. "Why'd you pick it??"

He pulled the thorn off carefully and shortened the stem. Never once did his eyes trail off the flower, even as he held out the thorn. "This one is me, obviously. I'm the one most ready to hurt anyone who'd dare to touch you." He tossed the thorn back into the rose bush, his eyes thoughtful.

I felt my face warm considerably and blinked at him blankly.

"Alice's note told me to call her right away. That's all it said, so I knew it had to do with you. She apparently had a vision of you, and managed to pick up your thoughts on the roses." Again he stared at the rose, and his voice was quiet. "You're wrong, you know. I keep telling you, you don't see yourself clearly."

Swallowing heavily, I shook my head. "No, I'm not wrong." I frowned as he carefully rolled the flower in his hand. "And you really shouldn't have picked that one." It felt so wrong to me. Now there were only six roses and my heart kept trying to symbolize it. Six, instead of seven, like there should have been. He picked himself out of the bunch. "Now you're not there." I saw his confused look and reached forward to touch the sickly rose. "You're not there to protect me."

Chuckling a little, Edward turned to me and reached out at the speed of light. Only time with him had honed my reflexes, or I might have flinched and jumped back. Instead, I held perfectly still and he pulled back a second later, his hand now empty. I reached up and felt the flower in my hair, the stem resting behind my ear.

"Bella, when are you going to realize, you are perfect to me just the way you are? I'll always be here to protect you." He winked. "Even if you can't see me." He turned and leaned forward to sniff the sickly rose, then he frowned and pulled back. "Hm, it's not the same." He grabbed my wrist and brought it to his face before pressing his nose against my pulse point and breathing deeply with his eyes closed. "That's better."

"Doesn't it bother you?" I asked quietly.

Shaking his head, Edward smiled, knowing what I was talking about and opened his eyes, looking up at me through his eyelashes. His eyes were still a light gold. "No. I've gotten used to it. Your scent doesn't bother me at all, anymore." He grinned abruptly. "Much like the roses."

I used my free hand to reach over, and I picked the sickly rose, despite Edward's protest and growl. "No, you got to pick yourself." I argued, ignoring his grin. "I can pick myself, too, if I want." He laughed and I felt a smile break out over my face. I examined the stem and found the tiniest thorn. My finger very carefully ran over it, careful not to cut myself.

"It has it's own way to protect itself." Edward stated with soft eyes. "Here." He reached out and ran his finger over the edge of the thorn. It didn't look like much, but I was afraid he was going to cut himself.

I grabbed his hand even as he tried to pull it back, ignoring how cold it was, and turned it over carefully, examining his pale finger for any trace of a cut. There was none, and I sighed as I reluctantly let his hand go. "I should have known." I murmured quietly. Looking at the flower, I realized he'd rounded off the edge of the thorn, without even removing it. I stared at it -the rose, that is- really looking closely. Sure, there were brown edges to it, but if you really gave it half a chance, it wasn't such a horrible flower.

I bit my lip as I looked to Edward. He was carefully facing the roses, his hands running over the leaves of the bush and pulling dead leaves off swiftly. Right before my eyes, he'd practically pruned the bush in under two minutes

"Edward?"

He looked at me inquiringly and smiled as his eyes drifted to the rose in my hair.

I hesitantly reached out and pushed the stem behind his ear, my face feeling like it was going to explode. Once the rose was resting against his face, I stopped and pulled back. "There. I'll always be there for you, too." It didn't feel right. I was pushing a sickly rose behind his ear; but his expression made it worth it.

He'd looked amused as I acted, but my words removed that amusement. Instead, a very soft look came to his eyes and he reached out. Gently, he traced his long, cool fingers against my cheek, running from my chin to the corner of my eye and then down to my lips. Then he leaned in. He stopped about an inch from my face with his eyes closed, and I knew what he was doing.

He breathed deeply and smiled. Then he leaned in and placed his forehead against my own. He continued to breathe steadily with a soft smile on his face before he slowly opened his eyes. They were so intense, and almost seemed to sparkle as he tilted his head back; his eyes fell closed again as his lips found mine.

My own eyes closed and I kissed him back. I dug my fingers into the dirt to keep some semblance of control, even as his icy lips danced with mine. His smell, his taste, they were all so incredible. I dug my fingers in even deeper as I struggled to resist the temptation to throw myself at him. I knew this was harder than he let on. He looked and acted like it was all so easy, but I knew it tested his control.

Finally, with my heart pounding and feeling dizzy, I was about ready to give up on my control. My fingers released the clumps of poor, tortured earth, and I leaned into the kiss.

That's when Edward chuckled and pulled back. He opened his eyes, and I noticed immediately they were several shades darker to a deep topaz. "What did the ground ever do to you?" He asked teasingly as he picked up my wrists.

I looked down and blushed scarlet to see the clumps of stubborn dirt that obviously hadn't had enough torture and still stuck to my hands. "Um…"

Edward laughed and shook his head before pulling me into a hug. I felt the rose behind my ear jostle, but it remained in place, and I smiled. _It really is like him, always there for me._ I thought as he pulled me to my feet and began leading me into the house.

I watched as the rose he wore stuck stubbornly into his hair, despite a strong breeze, and I laughed, catching his attention. When he looked at me expectantly, I shook my head. "Just thinking about the roses." He opened his mouth and I covered it with my hand, laughing again when I pulled my hand away and left a brown smear of dirt across his amused yet incredulous face. "Actually, I was just thinking how much like me that rose was. What, with the strong smell and being so…" I reached over to try and pull it out and began laughing when it got stuck in his hair, refusing to come out. I would have worried about hurting him; what, with me pulling his hair, but he didn't seemed fazed. "Dang stubborn." I finished in a fit of giggles, even as Edward reached up to pull it out and then put it back in.

"And I love it either way." He stated with a chuckle as he helped me into the house. "Come, love, it's time for the human to eat."

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Hope you like it.

Having Bella compare herself and the Cullens to a group of roses was an actual dream I had. She was walking through their garden and saw a stunning rose next to a kind of sickly rose, and compared it to her and Edward. This actually turned out better than I expected. :)

R+R please.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. :)

Tenshi


	3. New Girl

Basically, this was supposed to be the first chapter in a Twilight rewrite from Edward's POV, but I heard it had been done (a lot), and I lost the muse, so I'm taking a couple of chapters I wrote for it and posting them as one-shots. At least it's not going to waste, right?

**TriGemini** - Thank you, I'm glad you like it so far. Yeah, I loved the field trip in the movie, but I also liked the blood-typing they did in the book. I just wished they could have kept both scenes. I'd have liked to see Bella with the fainting bit and Edward helping her. Edward is intense, so it definitely helps in the chapters.

Exactly. The sickly, weak, dying rose is the human Bella. Whereas, the perfect, strong roses all around her are the Cullens. The one the pricked her finger is Edward, as he's the first one who'd willingly hurt (or even kill) anyone who dared to even _think_ of harming Bella. It was. Her thoughts started out sad, but I wanted a happy ending, so I worked it towards one.

That's why it's one of my favorites. I love how it turned out.

**JuseaPeterson** - Thank you, that was one scene combination that surprised even me. I just found myself wishing I could combine the ideas, and voila, it happened. :) LOL, well, when you mentioned the flower bit between Alice and Jasper, I _had_ to include it. Bella/Edward is my favorite pairing, but I can understand Alice/Jasper second easiest, so I like them as second place. If I can, I'll include hints of Alice/Jasper in the stories.

Well, the one thing I got was that Bella is very self-conscious around Edward. First with her confronting him in the book "Well, aside from the obvious..." ("You don't see yourself very clearly"), then with the picture in New Moon that her dad took of them, then with the bikes in Eclipse (when Edward gets a bike to ride with Bella)... It all symbolizes how much better he is than her, to her, so I wanted to point that out in a different sense.

I'm glad you enjoyed it, I think it's going to stay my top favorite chapter for a long time. LOL.

I'm always open to suggestions. Here's the next update, hope you like it. :)

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**(Normal POV)**

As he got out of his Volvo, Edward looked around at the people milling around. It was just another day at another school. It had all began to get tedious to him, by now, but then again, few could say they've completed high school as many times as he did. This was the second week at Forks High School.

"I've got another test, today." Rosalie's voice was as bored as everyone's faces.

"At least you don't have to study for it. You know it all by heart, by now." Emmett saw her mild glare, winced and nodded. "We're watching videos today." He tried to look sympathetic as Rosalie raised an eyebrow at him, but shrugged helplessly as a grin broke out instead.

Nodding silently as the others all split up, Edward turned and made his way to his French class. Not that he needed it; he'd pretty much mastered the language. Then again, Esme was always telling him it was wrong to show off. He basically zoned out through his whole morning, firing off automatic answers whenever he was asked questions and trying not to grin as he got even the hardest ones right. So, he couldn't help showing off a _little_.

The morning was slow, as usual. His first class had gone by smoothly, and his second, the same. People stared at him as he walked out of his second period class. That was nothing new. People always stared at him. At first, it was all unnerving to him. Now, he just didn't care anymore.

_He is so hot._

_He's really cute, and really smart… Wow._

He raised an eyebrow and kept his stare distant as he passed a trio of girls. Their heartbeats skyrocketed, but he ignored that, too, having had all too many years to get used to the sound of people's heartbeats. The girls giggled and began whispering about him as he walked past, ignoring the fact he was blatantly ignoring them.

_Wow, he so makes pale look cool._

_I'm surprised girls aren't crawling all over him. I'd gladly crawl all over him, if he wanted._

Giving in to the grin, Edward kept his head down and chuckled under his breath as he met up with his family at the bottom of the stairs leading to the lunch room. _At least that last one was slightly more original._ Seeing Rosalie's expression, he shook his head, keeping the crooked smile in place. "The usual." It was all he had to say. Even if the others couldn't hear the 'voices', they knew the expressions on the girls' faces well enough to know what he was talking about.

Alice grinned a little, her gaze turning mysterious. "Mhmm." She kept her mouth shut as she followed Rosalie and Emmett up the stairs, Jasper at her side. Her mind was going over Trigonometry equations, carefully keeping her real thoughts hidden.

Frowning for a split second, Edward hesitated. It wasn't something he usually did, but Alice had the uncanny ability to see the future, and somehow he knew she knew something she wasn't saying. _Great._ He thought sourly. _I have a feeling I don't want to know._ At least he knew it wasn't dangerous to his family, or she wouldn't be staying quiet about it.

Finally running up the stairs, he caught the door as it was abut to close and pulled it open, walking into the room and taking his sweet time to get to the lunch line. He wasn't hungry, so he wasn't in a hurry. Funnily enough, he smelled a strange, new scent he couldn't identify. It was sweet and floral, but distant enough not to bother him. He brushed it off as a new brand of perfume, or someone had changed their basic diet.

"Who's _he_?"

The voice was new, and he instantly decided not to care, figuring her to be another fan-girl in the making. At least he had an idea of where the new scent was coming from. _As if I needed another fan girl._ Walking to the lunch line, he pushed everything out of his mind and focused on clearing his thoughts, to ignore the rambling 'voices' that echoed throughout the room. _Everywhere I go…_

"That's Edward Cullen." _He's hot, sexy, godly, aloof, untouchable…_ Her 'voice' turned more and more bitter as she went.

He recognized the voice as Jessica Stanley, and glanced over in habit. He'd already decided to pretty much ignore them, but hearing his name, he couldn't ignore the age-old habit of automatically looking. The new girl was looking at him, not surprising. Jessica was talking to the new girl, and he only glanced at her briefly, her 'voice' flaring up. _So unimaginative._ Then his eyes strayed to the new girl, who had long chocolate brown hair and big, brown doe's eyes; his mind pressing out and looking for _her _'voice'.

Nothing.

He watched as her head ducked down a second after he looked at her, her cheeks turning red, and he looked away just as quickly -though it was more casual for him- confusion flaring up. Still, he continued to listen, straining to find her mind. _Why can't I hear her?_ Not being used to not getting his way, he frowned as frustration brewed inside of him. He glanced up briefly and got a good look at her. _Kind of cute, I guess._ He thought, not allowing his mind to process her face any more than that. He noticed how she looked at him, and again turned away. _Shy._ He immediately noted.

Rosalie must have noticed the unusual interaction. "Edward?" She was using her quiet voice. One only he and the others of his family would hear.

"He's gorgeous, of course, but don't waste your time." Jessica was still explaining, bitterness saturating her voice. "He doesn't date. Apparently, none of the girls in school are good-looking enough for him" I_ wasn't, obviously._

Grinning to himself, Edward looked down, faintly aware the new girl's eyes had shot to him again. He'd turned down Jessica three days earlier. The grin faded almost immediately when he tentatively reached out with his mind, only to get nothing in return. _Why can't I hear her? Is she an airhead or something?_

"Edward!"

Looking up, Edward watched as Rosalie raised an eyebrow and gave him a look that was clearly confused. "Sorry, I was…distracted."

"Listening to the 'voices' again?" Emmett asked with a grin.

To anyone else, that would have sounded very wrong. And how easily they talked about it would have sounded worse.

Edward nodded with a faint frowned. "The girl across from Jessica Stanley…" He watched as the others surreptitiously glanced in her direction, making it so subtle, no one else could have caught it. "I can't _hear_ her." He vaguely and quickly made a gesture to the side of his head before lowering his arm and picking at the bagel on his plate.

"Maybe she's an airhead." Emmett stated, earning him a slap on the arm by Rosalie on his one side, and Alice on his other. "What?" He gave a slight apologetic look when Alice hissed at him quietly.

Alice shook her head, her dark butterscotch eyes glittering mysteriously as she got up, walked off with her untouched apple and still sealed bottle of water. Her mind was running over a recent Spanish test she took, once again keeping her mind secluded from Edward's probing mind. Still, every now and then, he caught the new girl's face in her mind.

_That's beyond annoying._ Edward thought darkly as, after a moment he and the others joined her. He could hear the soft voice of the new girl talking to Jessica about her new home, and overheard Jessica call her 'Bella Swan'. _Hmm…sweet name._ He allowed himself as he walked out of the room, tossing his untouched orange and sealed bottle of juice in the trash on his way. He didn't process it any further as he went to Biology II; he really just didn't see anything special about the new girl.

He had no way of knowing she was about to change his life forever.

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Hope you like it.

Written November 28, 2008

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	4. Uhoh

**Angel Wings 113** - It was very unusual. I don't usually get inspired by dreams, though I have in the past.

**TriGemini** - I know. The problem with him not being able to read her mind was a big thing for him. Though, because of it, he was forced to interact with her, to learn her thoughts, and that caused them to get closer. Exactly, to Edward, Bella was just a simple little human girl. Nothing special, except he couldn't read her mind. So he was forced to interact with her, and she slowly grew on him.

I never knew if Alice had a vision of Bella, but considering that Bella was bound to become a large part of her brother's life, I would think she would have HAD to have seen something. Alice can be quite sneaky, can't she?

**JuseaPeterson** - Thank you. Yes, I know Midnight Sun was probably very different. I was trying to go for vampiric thoughts as well as human ones, too. I don't want this entire story to be just Bella's POV, so there will be occasional chapters from Edward's POV. I can't read the chapters on her site because I can't seem to open PDF files. Not to mention, I have very bad viruses that are starting to horribly mess up my computer, so I'm hanging on as long as I can.

Here's the next update.

**Book** : Eclipse

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**(At the Reservation)**

I'd snuck away. I wasn't sure, really, if it would work. It probably helped that I was alone, and Alice was a little ways away. If Edward had still been here, there was no doubt in my mind, he'd already be waiting for me to pull something like this. It was shockingly easy, actually. A snap decision, that was the key! I was in my car and on my way before I even finalized my plans, and I was eager to see Jake.

I had no idea what we would do, but after greeting the shocked Jacob, and having the breath squeezed out of me by one of his big bear hugs, we decided to go to the beach. Of course, the peace didn't last long, and Jacob was trying to talk me out of being with Edward. He kept pulling up how Edward had left me, and hurt me so deeply. It still hurt to think about it, but the difference was that Edward came back and I understood his reasoning.

"Look at that!" He called, cutting off my nasty comment after he said something that hurt me deeply. He pointed out towards an eagle in the middle of plummeting towards the ocean.

I watched as the eagle spread and flapped its wings at the last possible second, snagging a fish in its talons and taking off again, only its claws really breaking the surface of the waves. 'Nature taking its course', Jacob had called it. _It happens all the time._ My mind repeated the words.

"And yet, you don't see the fish trying to plant a kiss on the eagle. You never see _that_." He grinned mockingly at me.

_Ahh, I see._ I forced a tight grin back. "Maybe the fish was trying." The bitter taste was still fresh in my mind. I shrugged. "It's hard to tell what a fish is thinking. Eagles are good-looking birds you know."

Jacob frowned at me and sighed. "Is that what it comes down to? Good looks?"

I glared at him, not even phased by his sharp tone. _Do you really think me so shallow??_ "Don't be stupid, Jacob." I hissed.

"Is it the money, then?" He continued, obviously not getting the warning in my voice.

_Apparently, so._ I was filled with offence at his words. He obviously thought I only loved Edward for his looks or his money. I felt tears welling up in my eyes, along with my anger bubbling in my chest. "That's nice." _And it's time to go._ Getting up, I turned my back to him. "I'm flattered you think so much of me." I stated harshly as I began to pace away.

"Aww, don't be mad."

I wanted to ignore him, but he rushed over and grabbed my wrist, keeping me from going anywhere. He spun me around and the look on his face was so serious as he explained he was just trying to figure me out. I still wanted to leave, but as per usual, I allowed him to drag me back to the tree we'd been sitting on, and I tried to explain it. He flinched whenever I stated I loved Edward, and he got so upset. I had no idea what to expect, because there were times he looked ready to lose control completely. Why couldn't he understand how much Edward Cullen meant to me? Somehow, he kept his control, however, and we simply spoke. He told me the story of Sam and Emily, and I understood Edward's warning before.

_Werewolves are unstable. The people near them get hurt._

Our talk was more or less back and forth. From talking about werewolves, to 'bloodsuckers' as Jacob liked to call them. Even after hearing my explanation of why Edward left me, he still insisted that he was no good for me, and kept trying to talk me into joining the werewolves; being with _him_. It was useless. He might not have seen it, but I loved Edward too much to be swayed.

Besides all this, however, the only thing that really bothered me was when Jacob told me he wasn't aging. Everything else just kind of shut down, and my mind kept repeating what he'd said. _He's. Not. Aging. He's. Not. Aging!_ "You're not aging?!" I'd all but yelled. How was this fair?! Edward and his family didn't age. Jacob and the others weren't aging. Why did _I_ have to age??

"...I _will_ get older...someday." Of course he didn't understand my reaction.

We had to take a detour for him to explain that to me.

By the time our visit ended, I wasn't ready to leave, but I knew I had to. I still had to stop by Angela's, and I knew that the longer I stayed here, the more Alice and Edward would freak out. I was glad that they hadn't come to get me, but at the same time, I was worried that the longer I stayed, the more I tempted fate.

Jacob didn't want me to leave. In all honesty, I didn't want to leave, either, but I knew I had to go. I explained everything about sneaking out and Edward's possible reactions. Not a good idea when it came to Jacob. He definitely wanted to fight. I left in a haste, promising I would come back as soon as I could.

**(On the Road)**

I drove as I usually did, enjoying the empty street. I figured I'd stop by at home for a moment, but then I saw it. One minute there was nothing behind me but miles of empty road. The next, the sun was glinting off a silver Volvo that stayed on my heel as I drove. If I hadn't known it was _him_, I'd have been worried about it's proximity.

_Crap!_ I thought as I looked into the rearview mirror. His windshield was dark, but I could still make out his grim face staring right back at me. I had no doubt his eyes would probably be black, if I could see them -he was wearing his shades- and the way he gripped the steering wheel wasn't at all promising. I was actually surprised he hadn't snapped the darn thing. _Where'd he...? Alice, of course._ The thought made me shudder, and I tore my eyes away from the rearview to pay attention to the road.

The thought of Edward being upset was bad enough. I really wasn't looking forward to dealing with Alice, too. In fact, I totally discarded any thoughts of going home at the moment, and kept driving.

The engine of my truck protested, and I looked down at the speedometer, ignoring the burning feeling of his gaze from the mirror. I saw that I was edging towards 100 and lifted my foot a little, ignoring how it shook from nerves. His car easily kept pace with me, showing no signs of the speed increase and decrease. _Cool it, Bella. He won't hurt you._

I winced.

No, he wouldn't hurt me. That wasn't the reason I wasn't stopping. _I'd_ hurt _him_. I was more worried about his betrayed look, that I knew I'd see. He was upset, obviously, and I didn't blame him. I _was_ a little worried about him being mad, and maybe even yelling at me, but the big thing that bothered me was that I knew I'd betrayed his trust. He trusted me, and I snuck around behind his back.

The frown was marked deeply onto my face as I quickly gazed into the mirror. His answering frown was deeper, and I wondered if my refusal to stop was only bothering him more. My gaze quickly dropped to the brake pedal. It would only take a moment. Lift my right foot off the gas and put it on the brake. Stop. Talk to Edward. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

The engine protested again, and I sighed as I once again had to ease up on the gas.

I kept going right past my home, keeping my pace a little faster than usual as I drove down the street. I was a coward. A self-admitted coward. I kept my eyes on the road, my heart pounding painfully in my chest as I made my way to Angela's. I didn't stop or even slow down once. As soon as I pulled up on the curb, I hopped out and cast a surreptitious glance at his Volvo as it raced by.

He was facing the road, but I had no doubt he was glaring at me out of the corner of his eyes. I could feel it.

**(Bella's Home)**

_Jealous? Edward?_ I walked into my home in a hesitant stupor. I couldn't believe what Angela suggested, and yet it made so much sense. I knew Edward would be here -waiting in my room- even with the lack of vehicle in the driveway. No car never stopped him before. One of the benefits of being a vampire. _I don't want to do this..._ I'd greeted my father and explained my trip to Jacob's to him. He was thoroughly pleased to hear I'd been spending time away from Edward and his family. _Well, at least _one_ of them is happy._ I thought nervously as I climbed the stairs.

My feet moved more slowly than I would have liked, and I hoped to god Charlie wouldn't notice my obvious hesitation. I stopped halfway up the stairs and listened. Not for Edward, I knew I'd never hear him coming unless he wanted me to. Besides, I didn't have to _hear_ him to know he'd be waiting for me. Even through the walls of the house, I could almost _feel _his anger. No, I listened to the game Charlie was listening to.

A loud whoop was heard echoing through the room, and I let out a sigh of relief as I continued climbing the stairs. I fought off a small smile at his excitement over a game. Then I stopped. I looked at my door and took a deep breath as I hesitantly reached out and put my hand on the knob. The metal was cold, and I had a flash of Edward's hand, the last time I held it. The only difference was that the metal was hard and unforgiving. Not gentle at all. Edward, he was yielding and forgiving, usually. I wondered if he'd forgive me this time, too. Was he simply mad? Was he worried? Would he leave again??

That last thought sent my heart into a full out panicked frenzy. I recalled how I was when he left, and tears came unbidden to my eyes as the pain renewed itself. What if he _did_ leave me? I'd have deserved it, for sneaking around...wouldn't I? I thought about everything, from the words he said as he left, to finding him in Italy and almost knowing I'd lost him.

He always spoke of how much it hurt, coming so close to loosing me. Only now did I truly understand what he meant.

My head began to swim, and I realized I was holding my breath. I took several slow, deep breaths before taking one more and holding it again for a moment, trying to calm myself. Letting out a silent sigh, I inhaled sharply again and twisted the knob, pushing the door open and keeping my gaze on the floor as I fought the tears threatening to fall. I turned to the door and closed it as softly as I could, ignoring how my hands shook as I lowered them to my sides.

Of course he was there. I hadn't let out the breath I was holding, and it felt like my lungs were frozen as I turned to face him. The first thing I noticed was that he'd taken off his sunglasses, and his eyes were... Yep, you guessed it. Blacker than night. He glared at me, his face showing nothing but anger.

I winced and looked down. Finally, the breath came out, and I closed my eyes to keep my tears from following suit. "...Hi." I stated weakly, still staring at the floor.

No answer.

Looking up hesitantly, I noticed his eyes seemed to have softened the slightest bit. He was still glaring at me, but it didn't seem quite so...cold? Still he remained silent, his arms folded across his chest as he leaned against the wall next to my window.

I waited for it. I waited for him to yell, to tell me how much I hurt him. I waited for him to say he was leaving. It hurt, but I deserved no less after what I'd done, betraying his trust like that. I must have counted to one hundred in my head, but he didn't blink, he didn't move and he didn't speak. He might as well have been carved out of marble.

"Err.... So, I'm still alive." I muttered weakly, hoping the reassurance would help. The only thing he did was growl deep in his throat, and I felt my face heat up as I looked down. "No harm done?" I tried to insist with a small shrug.

I heard him sigh and the rustle of his clothing as he moved. I wasn't sure whether to jump for joy that I got a reaction, or run for my life. "Bella..." His voice was so quiet and full of strain. "Do you have _any_ idea how close I came to crossing the line, today? Do you know what that would have meant?"

I gasped and looked up sharply. He was pinching the bridge of his nose with his fingers and his eyes were closed, but at my gasp, they shot open and he dropped his hands to his sides. His eyes were still bleak and cold.

"You can't!" I cried, ducking my head and covering my mouth with my hands when I realized how loud I'd been. Charlie's game continued downstairs, I could hear it, and I dropped my hands to look at Edward's unflinching face as I struggled to contain my volume. "Edward, they'd use any excuse for a fight. They'd love that. You can't ever break the rules!"

"Maybe they aren't the only ones who'd enjoy a fight."

I didn't understand his toneless words, even as he continued to glare at me. Anger welled up at the way this was going. Part of me kept waiting for him to scream at me, another part wanted to scream at him. Instead, I settled for snapping. "Don't you start!" It hit me suddenly what he meant. "You made the treaty, you stick to it!" _Don't blow it over me!_

He kept muttering about if anything had happened to me, and that he couldn't know I was safe, because Alice couldn't see my future. I tried to insist I was safe with Jacob, but it seemed this little trick of mine had made some sort of snap decision for Edward, because he was now more protective than ever. He refused to negotiate with me about seeing Jacob, even as I tried to be strong back.

I got tired of the distance between us and took a single step forward. Edward regarded me with a raised eyebrow for a moment, but didn't move. I took that as encouragement and walked slowly over to him, wrapping my arms around his waist. I felt my heart beat painfully when he remained still and didn't hug me back. _Is he really upset? Well, duh! Stupid question._

"You weren't supposed to know about it." I muttered, wincing sharply into his chest. _Ok, that wasn't the best thing to say. _I knew Alice would have told him. I expected it. "You were supposed to be hunting." I added, struggling to think up the right thing to say. It didn't help that his arms slowly wrapped around me and his scent was knocking my brain offline. Looking up, I noticed, finally, that his eyes were too black. There was angry black and hungry black, and they were very different, trust me. His eyes were hungry black, and he had bruises under his eyes, from the lack of food.

I frowned in disapproval.

"When Alice told me your future disappeared, I came back." He stated easily.

My frown intensified. "You shouldn't have done that. Now you'll just have to go away again."

"I can wait." He shrugged a little.

I felt my eyes narrow. _Not because of me._ I tried to insist that I was fine around Jacob, but again he didn't want to listen to me. We argued about it, and of course the fact that he's a vampire, and has a whole family of vampires who'd agree with him meant I'd lost this battle before it even began. It didn't stop me from trying.

"You are....well, not exactly the love of my life, because I expect to love you much longer than that..." His eyes tightened and softened at the same time, and filled with warmth. "The love of my existence. I don't care who's a werewolf..." I ignored his eyes darkening again. "And who's a vampire. If Angela turns out to be a witch, she can join the party, too!" I paused for a moment. _Werewolf friends and vampire family._ I kept being struck by the awe that inspired. I saw him staring at me through narrowed eyes, and sighed. "Switzerland." I repeated the same thing I'd said earlier, about being neutral ground.

After a moment, he sighed. "Bella..." He tightened his hold on me and looked like he wanted to say something, but then released me and stepped to the side, more towards the window. His nose wrinkled in clear disgust and he turned away for a moment.

"What?" I asked, looking down at myself before looking back up at him. "What now?"

"Well..." He hesitated and sighed before looking at me. "Don't be offended, but you smell like a dog." He smiled that crooked grin I loved, and I knew that for the moment, the battle was over.

Pursing my lips, I took a step towards him and watched as his eyes narrowed warily. I took another step closer and his nose wrinkled as he took a step back. Now I grinned and jumped forward. As a vampire, I knew he'd be able to catch me and stop me, even before I could blink, but instead, he wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me to him tightly.

My face was buried in his chest, and I felt him chuckle. Narrowing my eyes, I held as still as I could, feeling his cool lips press against my throat. That's when it hit me. "You're not breathing!" I pulled back with a pout.

He chuckled and nodded.

"Aww! No fair!" I crossed my arms over my chest, but I couldn't keep the responding smile off my face. "I'll be back in a bit, I need a human minute." I stated as I grabbed my bathroom bag and my pajamas.

"Bella?"

Stopping, I turned and blinked in surprise as I was met with cool lips pressed against my own. I immediately responded, locking my arms around his neck and kissing him back. It was over too soon for my liking, but he gently took my arms and pulled me away from him with his usual chuckle.

"Hurry back."

As he stepped back, I took a moment to focus on my breathing before nodding to myself, turning and leaving the room, heading towards the bathroom. I knew that our discussion about Jacob was far from over. He wasn't going to concede, but neither was I. I realized that he wasn't as upset with me as I'd thought, but I still didn't know how I felt about sneaking out again.

I had promised Jacob. Maybe, if I kept on about it, I could wear Edward down. It was always a possibility. For now, I planned to take a quick, hot shower, get back to Edward, and relax for the rest of the night with him. I'd worry about Jacob tomorrow.

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Hope you like it.

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	5. Farm Work

**TriGemini** : That's very true. Even Jacob doesn't seem to realize he could hurt Bella, but in all honesty, I never thought he would, even from the beginning. With everything that happened in the book, I knew they were too close for something like that to happen. Poor Edward though, to love Bella so much but have to put up with her sneaking out and insisting on seeing Jacob, to not know if she's safe or what...

I love how that works with Bella. She can be uncertain at times, but she believes deep in her heart that neither of them would ever hurt her.

**JuseaPeterson** : Yes, Edward would hear the thoughts...unless he was tuning them out. Alice has a habit of teasing him and the others, and being quite hyper. Rosalie's thoughts seem...possibly scary at times, with her reactions to Bella. Emmett seems to come across as more of a football player type that doesn't have so many deep thoughts, and Jasper's tuning into emotions could annoy him. I don't know, but I'd be willing to bet that he only paid attention to those he knew were thinking about him and his family (before he and Bella got together, that is), so anything directed his way would be his top notice.

And plus, remember that as vampires, the others know how to keep their minds occupied with random things. Like Alice when she was at graduation and thinking of seemingly random yet complicated things to keep Edward out.

I understand it can be very difficult reading from Edward's POV, after reading what's been written of Dark High Noon/Midnight Sun (Twilightersanonymous . com). It's difficult to write from his perspective because you have to consider his ability, his own thoughts, and the thoughts of many others at the same time, not to mention his human side and his vampiric nature.

And thank you. I always worry about thoughts, because my mind can follow multiple trails at the same time. So I could be jumping around in someone's mind, if I try to get too complicated. It's difficult to keep it all straight.

Ok, so I work on a sheep farm, and this idea came from way out in the left field and hit me in the side of the head. This is meant to be a more fun chapter of randomness, that's all. Just a little play time.

**Book** : Not really based on any book/movie.

**Pairing** : Mainly Edward/Bella with a back pairing of Jasper/Alice

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**(Bella's POV)**

"I still don't get how you let Alice talk you guys into this." I looked at the three Cullens in front of me with a raised eyebrow. "And there's no life-threatening...threat?" I watched as Edward grinned and shook his head. "You're sure?"

"There wasn't a vision at all." Alice stated easily. She walked over and slung an arm over my shoulder. "I just remembered you saying you had to come help your uncle on the farm, and I thought you could use a hand." She grinned. "Or six."

"And have the work turn into two seconds of play for you guys?" I shot back with a raised eyebrow as I folded my arms over my chest. I saw the mock innocent look Edward gave me, even as his eyes sparkled, and noticed Jasper fighting off a grin and I rolled my eyes. "Fine! Just...behave. No..." I looked around and sighed. "No cheating, ok?"

"Where's the fun in no cheating?" Alice danced over to Jasper and took his hand. "But don't worry, you'll still have plenty to do."

_For some reason, I don't doubt that. _I nodded and left, heading to the back of the barn where the hay feeders were kept. We were at my Uncle Joe's sheep farm, and since he'd injured his back working with the hay and unloading fire wood, I'd volunteered to come out and help. Yes, I had to tell Edward and Alice, as I knew they'd never leave me alone about it if I didn't. Still, I wasn't expecting them to come up here and join me.

As I grabbed the pitchfork and thrust it into the clumped hay at the bottom of one of the feeders, I turned and looked over my shoulder. I heard quiet voices but didn't see any sign of the others, so I figured they'd find a way to keep themselves amused... Hopefully, that didn't involve hunting Unlce Joe's sheep. _The last thing I need is to explain where his flock of over fifty sheep disappeared to._ I turned back to my work and tried to heave a load of hay out.

It didn't work. I pulled and twisted, but the pitchfork wouldn't move. Finally, after a few moments, I sighed and leaned on the handle as I looked over to the others again. Still no sign. _Maybe if I..._ I heaved myself up and wrapped my legs around the pitchfork. _God I hope no one can see me!_ I figured in a worse case scenario, it would bust free and I'd land on my back on the sheep crap and snow-covered ground, and at best, nothing would happen. _Dang._ Nothing happened.

I wiggled on the pitchfork, trying to dislodge it, only to freeze and feel my face heat up as loud laughter reached my ears. _Double dang!_ I know how this looked. I was hanging on for dear life to the end of the pitchfork with my legs wrapped firmly around the handle, as well, and I was hanging there upside down. Edward's loud laughter had my face turning bright red.

It didn't help I could even hear reserved-and-quiet Jasper's laughter.

"Having fun Bella?" Alice's voice came across the yard.

I looked over at them, ignoring Edward's gorgeous face as I glared upside down at them. "You know, you _could_ help me instead of laughing." I stated pointedly.

Jasper made a show of thinking it over. "Nah." He stated as he poked Edward in the shoulder. "Maybe lover-boy can."

Edward stopped laughing, even though his eyes still sparkled, and he turned on Jasper. His look was a mocking 'oh, you did _not_ just say that'.

Alice danced over even as they began chasing each other around. She helped me off the pitchfork, then easily removed it and stuck it back in; only this time she stuck it in half way and easily pulled out a pitchfork full of hay. "You jabbed it in too hard."

I nodded absently as I watched the two light streaks racing around the field. I noticed that the sheep jumped several times, and how Jasper managed to catch Edward off guard, and picked him up. Raising an eyebrow, I kept watching as Edward laughed and broke free easily. I was a little torn between just watching them or scolding them for not only scaring the sheep, but racing around my uncle's farm using their vampire speeds.

"There."

Jumping, I turned to find the hay had been loosened and pushed to the sides of the feeder. In both feeders. I blinked a little as she laid the pitchfork against the side of the feeder and dusted off her hands. _So much for not cheating?_

"What's next?"

"Uh, the roof needs to be cleaned off." Did I mention it was Winter? The roof was covered in snow, and I explained that if the snow got too thick, it would be too heavy for the roof to support and could cause structural collapse. "So we go up on the roof and use the shovels to brush the snow off." I finished with a slightly stressed look as Jasper raced around the field with Edward close on his heels.

Or... I _guessed_ it was Jasper in the lead; I couldn't be sure because they were only grey and white streaks of light, racing back and forth across the field. The poor sheep were looking pretty scared, right about now. I was just really glad the farm was out in the middle of nowhere and Joe was stuck in bed.

"Ok, I'll go."

I snapped to attention. "Uh, Alice? Thanks, but I don't want you to put a hole in the ceiling by accident." I saw her raise an eyebrow and shook my head. "Really. I'll go." I raised a hand before she could speak. "_And_ I'll be careful."

I'd turned and walked to the ladder that was already set up before she could utter a word. I began climbing up it, slipping once, but catching myself. And I very slowly made my way up to the top of the roof, thanks to a rope tied to a secured section of the roof. I grabbed the shovel that was waiting for me and turned. That's when I heard Alice's voice.

"Jasper, would you put him down and help me here?" Alice's voice went too quiet for me to make out for a moment. "Ok, I want you to throw me up on the roof-what? Oh, don't give me that look! I'm not asking you to throw me _through_ the building."

I grinned and heard Edward's laughter. _Why don't you just jump?_ I thought as I tightened my hold on the shovel. Looking down at the thick pile of snow, I shrugged and pushed the shovel into it. Immediately, a large portion broke off and slide down the roof, falling off the end. All I did was dig the shovel in. I wanted to yell 'avalanche!' but the snow was over the edge before what happened even hit me.

All the laughter had died, and I stared in shock at the area I knew Alice was standing in. I vaguely noticed the entire flock of sheep running to the far end of the field in a panic at the noise the falling snow had created, but I ignored it as I waited to find out if I'd just signed my death certificate or if Alice was alright.

Actually, I was more worried about Edward, but I wasn't about to admit it.

It was too quiet for a long moment before I hesitantly took a step forward, down the icy shingles of the roof. "Uh...Alice?" There was a corresponding growl. _Well, at least I know she's alright._ I thought as I contemplated climbing over to the other side of the roof and jumping off, before running for my life.

"Honey, it was an accident." Jasper's voice was quiet and I sensed a soothing aura emanating from him. "Calm down." I knew he was trying to sooth her, but the tiny bursts of almost overwhelming amusement didn't help the situation. Obviously, he was trying to hide his amusement, but it wasn't working.

I took another step forward. That's when I lost my footing. I didn't even have time to do anything more than gasp in surprise and fear as my feet slipped out from under me. My back hit the roof hard, and it knocked the air out of me again as I slid. I felt the slightest friction on my back as I went, and then nothing. Nothing on my back; nothing to grab on to as my arms flailed; nothing to dig my feet into.

I was airborn. I still didn't have the wits about me to scream, but an embarrassing squeak _did_ manage to squeeze out as I fell.

Then, I landed on something kind of unforgiving, but a lot more forgiving than the earth would have been. Something cool and hard wrapped around my knees from underneath, and something wrapped across my back, just under my arms. Even though the embrace was familiar and comforting, I was certain I'd have bruises later. I opened my eyes -which I hadn't even noticed were closed, until now- and blinked for a moment, trying to process that I was still alive.

I was still waiting to catch my breath. I'd coughed a few times, and I breathed deeply, trying to slow the frantic pulsing of my heart. I felt the tension from Alice and Jasper, mainly because I knew Jasper was hyper-sensitive to the sound of the human heart, and the smell of their blood. I thanked all that was holy I wasn't bleeding.

"Bella??" Edward's frantic voice cut through my daze. "Are you alright?!"

"See, Bella? I told you I should have gone up." Alice's slightly smug voice cut into my thoughts as well.

"Don't gloat; it's not nice." Jasper scolded her quietly. His voice was slightly tense, but as I looked, I saw him holding his arms out to her. His eyes were black, but otherwise, he seemed ok.

My heart was slowing back to a normal pace, so that probably helped. At least now I had a handle on my breathing, too.

Alice pouted but leaned into his open arms. "Well, it's true." She raised an eyebrow at me, her hair and clothing covered in snow.

It hit me than that Jasper was covered in snow, too.

"Bella?" Edward's voice had softened.

Turning my head, I gazed into his butterscotch eyes and blinked for a moment. I realized he'd caught me when I fell, and I felt my face heat up. _Huh, that's probably why Joe suggested tying myself off to something up there._ I was a little embarrassed for not remembering to do so. "I'm alright." I insisted when he stared at me anxiously. "Really." I breathed a heavy sigh of relief as the reality of the situation settled in. "I just....slipped."

He nodded and carefully put my feet on the ground, but he kept his arm tightly around my waist, holding me against him. He had a little snow on him, but hardly any compared to the other two. "You slipped. I should have known." He sighed and looked to Alice. "Well, you wanted to show off. Go ahead."

I took the moment to reach up and dust the snow off his collar, surprised three vampires with exceptional reflexes would be caught by an avalanche of snow. They probably just hadn't cared, I figured.

Alice grinned and turned to the roof. "Jasper? If you'd please?"

"You _could_ just jump, you know." Edward stated pointedly.

Still, Jasper stepped up behind his slight wife and put his hands on her waist, causing her to slip out a giggle. He hoisted her into the air easily and tossed her up to the roof. Then he crouched down and sprung like a tiger, quickly following her.

"Hey!" I protested as they disappeared from sight. "Whatever happened to 'no cheating'??"

"We never agreed to no cheating." Edward stated, turning to me with a slight grin. He pulled me in against him and buried his face in my hair. "Are you certain you're alright, love?"

I felt my face warm up as it did every time he called me 'love'. Nodding into his chest, I breathed in his scent and relaxed, wrapping my arms around his waist, under his jacket. He was cold as ice, but under his thick jacket, my hands were still warmer, and I just held him closer.

He kissed the top of my head and sighed a little. I felt the icy breath ghost across the top of my head and shivered a little. "Come, let's go inside before you freeze."

"Too late." I murmured as I realized my backside, legs and torso were more or less numb. Hearing him chuckle a little, I groaned and buried myself deeper into his hold. "Just hold onto me and you'll warm up and I'll be fine." That was the nice thing about vampires. They were initially cool as ice, but if held against a warm surface, they warmed up.

Again Edward chuckled. "And here I've got my car on with the heater running."

Pulling away, I stared at him in shock. "You left your car running all this time?!" This from the same man who once complained about the wasting of the earth's infinite resources?

"No." He raised his hand to show he was holding a remote starter on his keychain. "But it will be warm once we get there." I hesitated and he raised an eyebrow. "You can cuddle into me in the car, if you're cold enough." He tempted.

That got me. "What're we waiting for??" I grabbed his hand and began racing to the car, flat out ignoring his laughter; as well as ignoring the laughter from Alice and Jasper on the roof. When I glanced up at them, I noticed they hadn't done any work. Alice was sitting in the cleaned off spot with Jasper behind her, and they seemed to just be cuddling. _So much for getting work done._

Alice must have sensed my look, because she looked at me and grinned before pointedly burrowing into her husband even more.

I looked away with my own grin before slipping on a patch of ice. I squeaked again -embarrassingly so- and was caught again by Edward. "Did I ever mention I hated snow?" When he nodded with a huge grin, I sighed. "Well, you can add ice to that list, too."

Edward laughed and shook his head before picking me up and carrying me to the car. I would have protested, but I kind of liked being in his arms. He opened the door -using his vampire reflexes so he didn't have to set me down at all- and sat down in the driver's seat, cradelling me in his lap carefully as he closed he door behind him. I burrowed deeper into _his_ lap as the heater did it's job in warming my body.

I felt his arms come around me again, and closed my eyes. _Yeah, the farm work can wait for a bit._ I decided.

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Hope you like it.

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	6. Exams

**JuseaPeterson** - Well also remember that, that one chapter was set more at the beginning of the series (if I remember right), so his family wouldn't have had much to think about Bella, since it should have been set before they met. Not to mention, Alice knows how to keep Edward out of her mind, and since he's the only one who can read minds like he does, he couldn't find out from the others. It's true though, that I could have included their thoughts. I just didn't think about it. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Alice/Jasper is my second favorite pairing, so I love to try and include them as much as possible, with how close to Bella Alice is.

**TriGemini** - Yeah that's what I was going for. Alice _can_ be serious when she wants to be, but more often than not I've seen her as a joker, or a girl whose really easy going. That's what I was trying to push. LOL It's Bella. If she can slip, she'll slip.

Ok, I _know_ I have details of this wrong. It's kind of just a mental spurt, if you will. I started with a slightly amusing thought from the mention of 'the vampire wars' in Eclipse, and ran wild.

**Book** : Eclipse

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With everything that was going on, my mind had been more on Victoria and vampires wars than the exams that were upon us in high school. I didn't even remember doing them, really. My first day was History and Calculus, and more than once I found myself scrubbing out the words 'vampire' or 'werewolf'. With a sigh, I sat at my computer and stared at the blank screen, listening to the pitter patter of the rain on the side of the house and against my open window.

Suddenly, there was an ever so slight breeze, and I smelled a familiar sweet scent.

"How were your exams?"

Turning to Edward with a slight start, I stared into his deep gold eyes a moment before forcing half a grin. "I don't know. Calculus actually made sense, so..." I paused and gave it a little thought. "I'm pretty sure I failed."

He laughed out loud as he moved to sit on the bed. "I'm sure you did fine." He reassured me, his smile never once fading.

"Oh, and I almost wrote about the vampire wars at the turn of the century." I added with a raised eyebrow, watching as his face soured.

His smile very slowly faded, until his face was a mask and I had no idea what he was thinking or feeling. Staring at me quietly, Edward's face was unreadable. He looked perfectly serious, and there was no hint of amusement in his eyes to show he found it funny. He didn't move; only his soft breathing reminded me he wasn't some marble statue.

"I rubbed them out. Got them all, too." I added hopefully, trying to get him to relax and fearing he might actually be upset. "I mean, I'm pretty sure I did. Wait..." Trailing off, I closed my eyes and raised a hand, counting off the numerous times I recalled having to quickly scribble out the words 'vampire' and 'werewolf'. "Got that one..." I counted three off my fingers, opening my eyes and keeping my gaze focused on them. "That one, and that one..."

A chuckle made me look up, and Edward was staring at me with open amusement, his beautiful face set into a brilliant grin. "I can guess what was on your mind." He stated with another chuckle before shaking his head and turning serious. "Bella, I'm serious when I say you don't need to worry."

I got up and walked over to my dresser, ignoring my pale reflection in the mirror. "Right. Of course." I knew my response was coming out harsh, and I tried to control myself, but the more I thought about it, the more upset I got. "Nothing to worry about. I only have _family_ going out to fight a very _dangerous_ battle for _me_. Sure, it's nothing. Just a couple dozen newborns versus seven vegetarians."

Edward chuckled again.

Snapping, I grabbed an old snow globe from my dresser and spun. "It's not funny!" I yelled, tossing it as hard as I could at the opposite wall. I never threw things, or got so upset, but this was a big thing to me. I was so worked up, I missed the fact that it hadn't hit, and I missed Edward carefully setting it down on my nightstand next to my bed. He gazed at me with a worried expression. "It's _not_ funny!" I hissed, walking briskly past him and out of my room.

It took me until I got into the bathroom and locked the door to realize several things. First of all, I was lucky Charlie wasn't home, or I'd have had a lot of explaining to do. With my state of mind, I didn't think dealing with his questions would be a good idea. _Don't worry dad. It's just a massive vampire war that's upon us, all because of me. Nothing serious. _Yeah, I really didn't think that would go over well. Second, Edward hadn't stopped me, or laughed. I knew he always saw my reactions as over-reactions, and they tended to amuse him.

He was a bloody vampire, I damn well knew I didn't have to worry...under normal circumstances. Except... I still did worry, and these weren't normal circumstances.

I knew once he realized how worried _I_ was, _he'd_ get worried, and try to reassure me. I also knew he'd try to distract me, and considering he's _Edward Cullen_, he'd probably succeed. But then I knew that no matter what, it wasn't just going to go away, no matter how many times I wished it would. Victoria wasn't just going to _go away_. The Volturi weren't just going to _go away_, and now, thanks to Edward's decisions, neither was my humanity.

It's like I had no voice. People heard me, but my opinions didn't matter. Jacob laughed, until he realized how serious I was. That didn't stop him from messing with Edward, even if he realized it hurt me. Edward restricted me, well... At least, he used to. I knew it was to protect me, but again my opinions and thoughts didn't seem to matter at the time. My dad... Well, I wasn't even going to _go_ there.

I stood in the middle of the washroom and looked around, not really ready to go face Edward after my childish outburst. Of course, as soon as it was over, I felt guilty and embarrassed. I knew he'd wait for me, but I didn't know if he'd be amused or serious, or maybe even angry, and my whole body vibrated with tension over all of this. Again, I didn't think I could take either reaction. Turning to the tub, I turned on the water, running it to as hot as I could stand. Then I carefully stripped and got in the tub, flinching as the water ran over my cold body.

"Oh, of course." I muttered to myself, only briefly wondering if Edward could hear me over the water. He probably could, knowing him, and that thought only made me hesitate a moment longer. Not to mention, the idea had me blushing that he could probably hear the water running over my body. _Don't go there. Don't go there. Don't go there. Too late._ "Nothing to worry about. I see you as family. All of you." I spoke a little louder now, still keeping my voice low. My face was warm, but I focused on the subject stuck in my mind. I knew that listening or not, he'd hear me, and he couldn't interrupt without barging in and covering my mouth. He wouldn't do that, he was too gentlemanly for that. "And you're all going out of the way to protect me. One measly little human girl." _One measly little klutzy human girl._ I mentally added.

"Why should I be worried? I love you all so much, and you're facing an uneven fight because...why? Because some psycho vampire witch has it in for me? Because I'm still a vulnerable human?" _That second part is easily enough remedied, if they'd really consider it._ I knew it wasn't that Edward didn't _want_ me, but I still felt the surging rejection easily.

The water ran over my body easily, erasing the tension as fast as it could come on. I barely felt the scalding temperature, but my mind _did_ point out I'd probably smell stronger than usual to Edward.

_Not my fault. If he can't handle my smell, that's too damn bad._ It was actually kind of funny how angry I could be, when I didn't have to stare into his inhumanly beautiful face.

"Say what you want, of course that's going to be the primary thing on my mind. Of course I'm going to be worried. Or do you really think me so cold, I'll listen to your words and not care that you could still get hurt, or..?" Trailing off, I covered my mouth as a sob wracked my frame. I felt the tears leaking out of my eyes, as hot as the water cascading down my body. My mind flashed to the worst-case scenario, and ran through images of various Cullens injured or even dead and burning. When it flashed to images of Alice's dead body, and Edward's unseeing eyes, I took a moment to push past that thought and erase the images, before I lost it completely.

Letting my hand drift back to my tangled hair, I sighed heavily as I tried to work the knots out. I forced myself to move beyond that thought, and tried to relax. "I care. I can't help it. I'm sorry you find my anger and frustration _amusing..._" I stopped again and closed my eyes, struggling to ignore the whole body tremble I let out. _That was low._ "I'm sorry."

I spent the rest of the shower silently, not really sure what else to say. Part of me hoped he hadn't heard me, at least then I wouldn't have to face his reaction when I got back into the room. Another part hoped he did. _Or I'd feel pretty stupid talking to an empty room._ I wanted to stay in the hot shower forever.

My tension faded, and I felt ready to collapse. I let out a huge yawn and scrubbed at my face. Then it hit me the water was starting to feel pretty cool. With a sigh that bordered on a put out groan, I turned and shut off the water, climbing out of the tub and toweling down quickly before putting on my pajamas. I stood in front of the door, my hand outstretched for the knob. I hadn't combed through my hair, and as I looked into the fogged up mirror, I sighed before moving my hand to the brush and doing just that.

Yes, I was hesitating.

_I feel so stupid, but I can't help but worry._ I mentally scolded myself. _They don't need me throwing a fit on top of everything else they're already doing._ It hit me that I had a full compliment of seven vampires watching out for me. They were going out of their way to protect me, and I even had a werewolf out there. For a moment, it was awe inspiring, that I had those kinds of friends. _And I'm being a witch about all of this. They just don't want me to worry._

"I know..." I blushed at myself for answering my own thought out loud. "I know...that I don't have to worry, but I can't help it. It's just the way I am." I stated firmly into the mirror, ignoring the fact that I could barely see the blurry shape on the other side that was my reflection. Shivering a moment, I wrapped myself in a dry, warm towel and opened the door to the bathroom.

Immediately, I noticed it was dark outside, as I looked out a window at the end of the hall. It had been late when Edward came over, but now it was later. Luckily, Charlie wouldn't be home for a few more hours. He was working late today. He'd already come home for dinner and was back out the door again, for once, not warning me about what he'd do if he caught Edward here when he got back.

As if he could _catch_ Edward here. And as if he _could_ hurt him.

The hall was empty, and the light on. I knew I hadn't turned it on, so Edward must have. Once again, I felt childish for my outburst. Tears sprang into my eyes, and I lowered my gaze to the floor as I took a deep, shaky breath. I began to pad softly towards my room, and I dreaded what might wait for me.

Would he be mad? Would he laugh? He'd probably be worried, or maybe he left to give me time to myself.

No, that last one was definitely too much. With the way things were, Edward didn't like to be away from my side more than was absolutely necessary. I was pretty positive he'd be there when I got to my room.

Unsurprising that my steps slowed at that thought.

I tried to distract myself by thinking of the History essay. I began absently verbally running through what I'd very _nearly_ handed in, complete with the 'vampires', 'werewolves' and I even added the 'newborns' in as I went, idly wondering how the essay would have turned out if I hadn't had to fix my errors. I walked into my room with my head down, muttering about the newborn rebellion and the vampire-werewolf alliance of the turn of the century.

Laughter rang out musically, and I jumped, looking up to see Edward reclined on my bed, laughing and shaking his head. "Hm, I would have been interested in seeing that essay." He stated as he got up and walked over. He didn't even hesitate as he wrapped his arms around me in a tight but gentle hug. All of a sudden he froze. I felt every hard plane of his body -which was currently pressed up against mine- stiffen simultaneously.

"Edward...?" I felt my face warm up as I heard him sniff the air a moment.

With a slight, animalistic growl, Edward abruptly released me and stepped back. It was only one step, but he was across the room in the blink of an eye and almost pressed against the wall. I got a good look at the stiff expression in his eyes, and noticed they were pitch black. _My smell._ I hadn't cared, before, but now I backed up, instantly regretting taking such a hot shower.

"It's ok." He stated tightly, letting out a ragged breath and relaxing ever so slightly. "Really. I just wasn't expecting your smell to be so...strong." His voice was gruff with the strain of resisting his hunger.

"And I'm wrapped in a towel." I muttered out loud, speaking mostly to myself.

He grimaced and took a few steps back, almost leaning against the wall by the open window. Once there, he visibly relaxed and offered an apologetic smile. "Please forgive me, Bella. I didn't mean to...react...badly." Now his voice was a little softer.

"Reacting badly would be my first Biology II class." I stated with a tight grin, biting my cheek to keep from spitting out the 'constipated' comment Angela had made, last time we spoke of it. "This is a relatively....good reaction."

He winced a little and looked at me closely before sighing. "Bella-" He obviously hadn't seen my amused expression, and I wondered if he'd had a chance to pick the 'constipated' comment out of Angela's mind, yet.

"Wait." I held up a hand and pulled the towel from my body so that I could climb into bed, noting immediately how he stiffened up severely and took another step to the window. He was now pressed firmly against the wall. _Ok, _that's_ a bad reaction._ I thought as my face warmed. I saw him glance to the window and sighed as I walked over to my bed. "If you want to leave-"

"No." He said it quickly -_too_ quickly- and without hesitation, but I still had to gaze into his eyes for a moment to believe him. "Really. Just... Just give me a moment."

"Alright...." I crawled under the covers before the cold wind could chill me. Also, I knew the blankets would muffle my smell a little. Once there, I hesitated, waiting for something. Edward's wrath, or his sudden flight, I had no idea. I watched as he stared at me, visibly warring with his hunger. I wanted to apologize. I knew my smell was hard enough to handle, but it seemed especially hard tonight. The super hot shower didn't help, obviously.

I had no idea what my face showed, but Edward frowned and took one halting step towards me. "Bella, relax."

"I am relaxed." I lied quickly, burrowing into my covers more, as if to prove a point.

"Your heart is pounding, you're shaking, and I can see the pain in your expression." He stated quietly, raising an eyebrow as he took another step closer, his hands curled into tight fists at his side.

I mentally cursed myself for not watching myself. "I'm sorry." He took another step and quickly turned it into a back step. "Don't force yourself." For a moment, I watched him glance at the window with a deep frown before he turned back to me. "I'm serious, Edward." I wasn't trying to be brave, and I wasn't trying to be snarky. I really didn't like him pushing himself.

He held up a hand and closed his eyes, taking a very deep breath through his nose, and holding it. For several long moments, I watched his face contort between pain and hunger, to defiance, and finally, a small smile. "I can handle it." He opened his eyes and took several exaggeratedly slow steps towards me. "See?" He crawled up on to the blanket and very slowly leaned towards me, burying his nose in my neck and breathing deeply. "I just need to get used to it."

I knew what he meant, but with his cold breath ghosting across my throat, my mind went blank. "Get used to it?" I echoed, blushing as my voice cracked.

He sniffed again, even as he wrapped an arm around my waist. He was leaning partially over me and partially against my side. Then he pulled his head back and raised an eyebrow at me, his smile impish. "The strength of your scent." he clarified. "It shouldn't be so difficult, again." His eyes were no longer pitch black, but I could see that they were a very deep brown. He shifted his position to lay next to me, his body cool despite the thick quilt on my bed.

It was my turn to raised an eyebrow. "I seem to recall very similar words said in the meadow, a while ago." I muttered out loud.

He chuckled quietly. "I didn't run screaming, did I?" Wrapping his arm more tightly around me, Edward pulled me against him and burrowed his face into my neck.

"You didn't run 'screaming' the first time, either." I reminded him, biting my cheek to keep from grinning. "At least, not out loud." I felt him press his lips to my throat in a light kiss and swallowed heavily.

Now he laughed. "Ah, but I _was_ screaming, on the inside. What you do to me...." Suddenly, he pulled back to look into my face. He sighed and looked serious. "Forgive me, Bella."

"For what?" I yawned and blushed, covering my mouth.

Smiling, Edward traced a finger along my cheek, and it sent a shiver along my spine. "For laughing, earlier. It wasn't funny, you're right."

I winced and sighed as I buried my face into the crook of his neck, kissing his throat lightly. "That was my fault. Call it my own personal temper tantrum." I closed my eyes and had to fight to open them again. "I'm sorry."

His head shook above me and I felt him tighten his hold on me, ever so slightly. His icy fingers ran a trail across my neck, making me shiver violently as my warm body protested at the cold intrusion, and I felt him laugh. "I'll stop torturing you....for tonight." His fingers moved to my chin and lifted it. I was still having a hard time keeping my eyes open, but feeling his lips against my own, I eagerly kissed him back. It took a moment, but he pulled away before either of us could get worked up, and he wrapped me in his arms again. "Sleep well, my Bella. I promise you're safe." He whispered.

With his sweet lullaby echoing through the still air of the room, and the feeling of being utterly safe in his arms, I drifted off into a peaceful, dreamless slumber.

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By the way, I'm totally Team Edward (Jacob irritates me too much. Kind of like an annoying yapping puppy that never stops), and I'm all for Edward/Bella. Don't get me wrong, I kind of like him as a character, I'm just not really Team Jacob, sorry. Robert Pattinson did wonderful as Edward Cullen (and Cedric Diggory of HP:GOF), and though she _could_ have done better -in my opinion, of course- Kristen Stewart did very well as Bella Swan.

Hope you like it

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	7. IMPRINT!

**JuseaPeterson** - Well, I'm wary about Rosalie. I know she's capable of being a good person, and she has a lot of points which have turned me to not hating her character, but even in the end, I found she was more concerned about Renesmee than Bella, and she didn't seem to care for Bella as much, though it may just be the way I saw it.

Oh, side note, I'm working on a sort of 'Bella's Diary' story, which is her personal thoughts from just before Twilight, to throughout the book/movie. Do you think it's an ok idea to do? I got the original idea from your 'Syd's Diary' for PRNS (and I credited the idea in my disclaimer on the first chapter)

Exactly. Well, I just wanted her to have a moment alone to collect herself, and speaking through the shower seemed like a good way to do it. Of course Edward wouldn't go in there, despite wanting to, and Bella would know that. She'd also know he'd be able to hear her over everything, and he'd pay close attention to her words. Really? Wow, thank you. I'm glad you enjoy it. I have to be honest, though, _my_ favorite chapter, by far, is the Rose one. I've never used so much symbology, and it struck me as being really deep.

**TriGemini** - Well, they had cares. With the upcoming battle with the newborns and all that, but for the moment they were able to put everything on the back burner and just relax together.

**Rating** : 'T' for minor language.

**Note** : This one is going to follow fairly closely to what happens when Bella finds out about Jacob imprinting on her daughter, only with more thoughts and (hopefully) more descriptions. This chapter had me grinning almost evilly while I read over what I wrote. I hope you enjoy it.

(Me thinks I let my sick, masochistic side out a wee bit _too_ far in this chapter. LOL)

**Book** : Breaking Dawn

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I puzzled over it, watching him stare at my daughter. Staring at her like... I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me as my mind and body froze. I felt the horror and rage almost as strongly as the thirst.

No, that's not right. I felt them stronger. Right now, I wanted nothing more than to make Jacob cease to exist.

_How _dare _he?!_ I thought angrily as the rage built up. _How dare he! How dare he?!_

Jacob stared at my daughter with such uncensored adoring and longing. He stared at her like...like he was a blind man seeing the sun for the first time.

"_No!_" I hadn't meant to shout. I heard Jasper's teeth snap together, and felt Edward's arms around me, even as Jacob snatched my baby girl out of my arms. I stood there without fighting, a low growl resonating through my chest as I glared at my soon-to-be-dead best friend. I felt it coming, the snap they were all expecting. I didn't even try to fight them, but without removing my glance from Jacob, I turned my head towards Rosalie. "Rose... Take Renesmee." I was a little surprised at my own self control over the situation.

Jacob seemed to realize the wisdom in not fighting. He didn't look pleased, but he allowed Rosalie to take Renesmee, and they both backed away from me.

"Edward..." I raised my hands and placed them firmly on his arms, squeezing only tightly enough to make sure he was fully aware I could hurt him if I wanted. I think he knew though, I'd have rather died than hurt him, but in my condition, it wasn't something I had a lot of control over at the moment. "I don't want to hurt you..." I tightened my hold ever so slightly. "So please let go of me." I felt him hesitate. "Go stand in front of Renesmee." I suggested, releasing his arms and patting them slightly.

I trembled a little as he reluctantly did so. As soon as I was free, I leaned into my hunting crouch, my mind still chanting 'How dare he?!' over and over, even as I took two steps closer. "You _didn't_!" The tone was an outraged hiss.

I stalked him out of the door, even as he half ran down the stairs, backwards. "You know it's not something I can control." He was trying to reason with me. The damn dog _imprinted_ on my daughter, and he was trying to _reason_ with me?!

"How _dare_ you!" I hissed, allowing my thoughts to roam freely. "You _stupid mutt_! How _could_ you?! _My baby!_" I was advancing on him, and the trembling of the rage got stronger. _My baby! She's _my_ baby!_ I wanted to tear him limb from limb, and my newly powerful mind helpfully shared images of his reaction as I cheerfully mangled his body so that when he healed, he'd be walking on his hands and eating with his feet.

"It wasn't my idea, Bella!" He insisted firmly, still backing away.

"I've held her all of _one_ time and already you think you have some moronic wolfy claim to her? She's _mine_!" She was my baby. My _baby_! She wasn't even a week old! How dare he!! I growled loudly and took another step forward.

"I can share." He stated pleadingly.

I felt my eyebrows skyrocket at that. He was speaking of _sharing_ my daughter, like she was some little toy. Some piece of property. _Then again, 'she's mine' doesn't sound any less possessive._ My logical side chimed in. _Shut up! She's _my_ daughter, so she _is_ mine!_ I argued, my eyes narrowing. Who did he think he was, trying to _negotiate_ terms of possession of _my_ daughter?!

"How dare you _imprint_ on _my_ baby?! Have you lost your mind?!!" I advanced another step, still snarling, with my fists at my side.

"It was involuntary!" He had his hands up in a peaceful sign as he backed to the tree line. Suddenly, he wasn't alone, but I couldn't have cared less that Seth and Leah Clearwater were there, backing him up. I'd deal with them too, if they got in my way. There was no way this...this... There was no way in _hell_ this mutt was going to _imprint_ on _my_ little Renesmee!

A loud, animalistic snarl ripped through my lips, and I was slightly startled by the venom behind it. Literally. I had to swallow the venom that pooled in my mouth. It still wasn't enough to calm me. He tried to insist it was an accident. He even went to explain he'd originally gone over to _kill_ my baby, because he thought it killed me.

Another snarl slipped past, but I was beyond the point of caring how deadly and terrifying I sounded. "You wanted to _kill_ her, and now you've _imprinted _on her?!" I stepped closer, ignoring him ordering Leah and Seth to stay behind him. "You're _not_ helping your situation, _dog_!" I spat angrily. Leah pulled her lips back from her teeth and I mimicked the posture, only with ten times the hostility.

"Just listen to me!" He was still pleading, but I could see he was beginning to get frustrated.

It hit me then, another reason little Renesmee wasn't safe around him. What if he lost control of his anger and hurt her? What if he phased in front of her and hurt her? What if...?!

I snarled and growled, glaring when I sensed Jasper making a move. He frowned deeply, his own lips pulled back from his teeth, but he remained still. I don't know why. He should have interfered to keep me from killing Jacob. Why hadn't any of them interfered? Rose hated him almost as much as I did at the moment, so that explained her. Edward was pretty damn pissed, but even _he_ wouldn't have allowed me to go too far, I hoped. Jasper looked confused, and Carlisle, Esme and Emmett all stared at me in blatant shock and confusion. Alice looked like she had a migraine.

For a moment, I slipped out of my rage, seeing the looks on their faces. _Oh my... They must think I'm such a monster._ I swallowed heavily, but seeing Renesmee in Rosalie's arms brought my rage back and I spun back to Jacob. "She's a _baby_! She's not even a week old!"

"Bella, would you _try_ listening, please?"

My family was forgotten as I glared at him. "Why should I?!" I growled, standing where I was.

"Because you're the one who told me this. Do you remember? You said we belonged in each other's lives, right? That we were family. You said that's how we were supposed to be. So..." He shrugged. "Now we are. It's what you wanted?" At least he had the sense to seem uncertain at the last little bit.

My eyebrows had settled down at first, as his weird rambling made a very bizarre sense, and yet they shot up at the end of this. "You think you'll be part of my family as my _son-in-law_?!" I couldn't handle it. The idea was too perverse and weird. He was only two years younger than me, though physically, he was much older. The idea of him and my baby was _so_ wrong!

Emmett was laughing. I think I even heard a few random chuckles from the others as I had a Bella moment in the argument.

Again, I froze. It was so very strange. From everything I heard, I should have ripped his throat out already, and made a huge bloody mess of what was left of his body. Then I should have been dancing with Edward on his grave. Yet... Here I was, having a fairly Bella-like argument. I was rational -to a point- and angry, but I hadn't lunged for him...yet.

Esme sighed quietly. "Stop her, Edward." The tone was a quiet murmur, but I heard it as clearly as if she'd spoken it in my ear. "She'll be unhappy if she hurts him."

_No I won't!_ I thought, a perverse masochism filling my mind. _I really, really, _really_ won't!_

I waited for him to race over and wrap his newly warm arms around mine. I waited for him to say something that would snap me out of my nearly murderous rage, or to walk in between us. Hell, I even waited for him to _encourage_ me! There was nothing. No pursuit. No movement.

"No!" Jacob stared at me in blatant horror. "How can you even look at it that way?!" He looked almost disgusted, but the awe and adoration as he glanced to my baby girl obviously overpowered the thoughts I'd put in his head. "She's just a baby for crying out loud!"

"_Exactly_!" I snarled, hesitating and stopping myself from taking a step forward. "That's my point!"

"You know I don't think of her that way!" He was trying to defend himself, the look of disgust still wedged firmly on his face, and he was also trying to explain to and placate me at the same time. His eyes shot past me, but in a different direction, and I could clearly see Edward's face reflected on the surface of Jacob's brown eyes as he locked his gaze on my husband. "Do you think Edward would have let me live this long if I did? All I want is for her to be safe and happy, is that so bad? So different from what you want?" Now he was angry and shouting back at me.

_No. _It really wasn't, but knowing they'd grow to be lovers, that my little baby girl was 'destined' to fall for Jacob.. She was just a baby! I couldn't get over it! I didn't know what to say, I was so angry and confused. Instead, I shrieked a growl at him, more animalistic than anything I'd let out by far.

I was a bit stunned to hear a very soft laughter from behind me. Edward was clearly enjoying my rage and reactions more than he should have been. "Amazing, isn't she?" He murmured in a low voice filled with awe and love.

"She hasn't gone for his throat even once!" Carlisle's tone was just as muted, but filled more with shock and confusion. He sounded so stunned.

Emmett hissed almost silently, but I caught the sound. "Fine." He obviously wasn't happy. "You win this one."

I wasn't so sure. I still wanted to kill Jacob, and if the bet was on my going for his throat, I was fairly certain the odds were in Emmett's favor. Sure, the rage had backed off, but it was still there easily within my reach. All it would take was one wrong word from Jacob's mouth and my control would surely snap. I closed my eyes, trying to take deep, even breaths. It didn't help my throat was burning with thirst, and Jacob was still a target if I decided I needed batting practice.

I threatened him to stay away from her. I could handle anyone else being nearby. Hell, I'd prefer Leah Clearwater to Jacob being near my baby right now. He insisted he _couldn't_ be away from her, that it was beyond his control. I didn't buy it.

I didn't _want_ to.

Glancing out of the corner of my eye, I saw Renesmee watching the whole thing with teary eyes. She wanted Jacob to stay, there was no doubt in my mind. I knew she'd like him. He explained the imprinting, and it wasn't just the wolf. The human/human-vampire hybrid/whatever felt the connection, too. Did I even dare believe she wasn't being coerced by this strange connection??

"Run away while you still can." I threatened, my hands shaking again. There were too many unanswered questions and too many answers I just plain didn't want to accept. She was _my_ little girl and I would be damned before I allowed this imprinting to happen. A small voice in the back of my head informed me it already had and there was nothing I could do about it, but I stubbornly pushed that little voice away.

"Come on, Bells." Jacob grinned a little. "Nessie likes me, too!"

I stopped breathing. Everything went completely and unnervingly silent behind me, showing me the reaction of the others. I tried to take a breath, but the rage was so powerful, I was beginning to see red in the corners of my vision. "_What_....did you just call her?"

He looked sheepish and took a quick step backwards. "Well...that name you came up with is kind of a mouthful." He admitted with an apologetic smile.

That did it. All the control I struggled so hard to keep had finally snapped and I _felt_ Jasper's awareness of the situation. "You nicknamed my daughter after the _Loch Ness Monster_?!" _My daughter, the sea serpent._ I let out a shriek I heard echoing for miles. I heard birds take flight in terror, along with other animals, some distance away. I didn't even pay attention.

I lunged for his throat.

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Hope you like it

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	8. Leaving

**JuseaPeterson** - Oh, no. I didn't mean to suggest that Rosalie didn't care about Bella at all. There were just times after Renesmee was born that seemed like Rosalie could have cared _more_ for Bella. That's just her character, though. I don't mind.

I'm still working on the diary story. I have about 10 chapters done, but I'm having trouble because if I write for EVERY day, it'll get boring quickly and be super long. If I don't write EVERY day, I feel like I'm missing things. But I've come to realize that some people get caught up in life and can forget about their diaries for a while, so I'm still working on it.

Thank you. I had to laugh when I found out about her reaction, and despite being a newborn, I also realized she really was still Bella. This is another chapter from the story I tried to do (Twilight from Edward's POV?), that didn't span out, so I borrowed my chapter for this story instead.

**TriGemini** - That's very true. Also the fact that so many people wanted to see Jacob and Bella stay close, and this is one way to do it. I found it a little odd that they imprint on babies, but it took me reading over the info about their imprinting in Eclipse to recall that it's merely familial emotions until she gets older. Protection, love, adoration, etc, etc.

Yes, I can see why Edward and Bella got upset. In their eyes, Renesmee's just a little baby. _Their_ creation of love, and in a sense, they now not only have to share her with werewolves (aka, Jacob), but it's now arranged that Renesmee will fall for Jacob, and never really have a choice, because the imprinting says that's what's going to happen. I can understand both points of view, but if it _had_ happened, to _my_ baby, I'd have ripped Jacob's manhood off, with or without other werewolves getting in the way. It's motherly instinct, I think.

And yes, Nessie is just... When I first heard it, I thought of the Loch Ness Monster. LOL. I loved Bella's thought of 'My baby, the sea serpent'.

Sorry about the late update, here's the next chapter. I hope you enjoy it.

**Book** : Twilight, from Edward's POV

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**(Hospital, Normal POV)**

As Carlisle walked out of the room, he waved to the patient and smiled at the young girl at her side. "Now, you just make sure your mother takes her medicine and gets rest, and she'll be fine." He stated with his smile fixed firmly in place.

The little girl smiled back and nodded, and the young woman laughed softly, ruffling her daughter's hair. "Thank you Dr. Cullen." She stated fondly.

He nodded with a smile, watching as the little girl made as if to push her mother to lying on the bed, and her mother did so with another soft laugh. It was amusing, and very touching.

"Dr. Cullen?"

Turning out of the room, Carlisle brushed a hand through his blonde hair and sighed before handing a chart to a nurse who had walked up to him. "Yes?" He saw her looking nervous and frowned, briefly wishing he had Edward's power of reading minds. "Is there a problem?"

"Well…" She hesitated and looked around a moment. With a sigh, she turned back and placed the chart at her side. "You have a visitor in your office."

That wasn't any reason she should look so worried. Carlisle kept frowning and raised an eyebrow, millions of questions running through his mind. "My wife, or one of my children?" He asked as he walked with the nurse down the hall. He knew it was one or the other. Only his family was allowed to wait alone in his office.

"A Mr. Edward Cullen. He looked a little…" She hesitated, looking openly nervous. "Upset." The way she'd stated it, it was very likely Edward was _more_ than a 'little' upset.

_Speak of the devil… Edward? Upset?_ Very little tended to ruffle his family, apart from Volturi-related problems, and wanderers. This had Carlisle worried. If it was either of the first two, his children could have called him and he'd have gone home. "Hmm…that's interesting." Thinking quickly, he turned to the nurse. "I'll see him now, thank you." With a nod, he turned and walked briskly down the hall, opening his office door and walking through before closing it silently. "Edward."

He stopped immediately, taking in his son's unusually pale skin, and the literally black eyes he was faced with. Sniffing cautiously, he found that Edward had also recently fed, which shouldn't have been necessary.

"I need to leave." Edward's tone was gruff and unsteady as he sat on the edge of Carlisle's desk. "Now."

"Relax, son. We need to talk about this. Tell me what happened." Edward hadn't been this upset in ages, and it was unnerving to see him so. Carlisle tried to run through the things he knew would bother his family, but none of them seemed to fit.

"You don't understand!" Edward had managed to keep his voice down, luckily, and hissed the words out. "I _need_ to _leave_, _now_." He stood up and his body remained slightly hunched, showing he was very barely in control at the moment. He flicked his wrist so fast, no human would have been able to catch the movement, but Carlisle easily caught the car keys tossed to him.

Nodding quickly, Carlisle knew it was serious or Edward wouldn't be so dire to get away. He also knew what Edward was getting at, tossing his keys at him. He fished his keys out of his own pocket with the same speed, and tossed them at Edward, crossing the room and grabbing his adoptive son's arms as he caught the keys. "Just give me the jist of it." He pleaded quietly.

"New girl at school." Edward's voice calmed ever so slightly, but the change was discernable to Carlisle. "Her _smell_…" He swallowed heavily, his black eyes glistening dangerously. "Her smell is _so strong_!" The excitement in his eyes reminded Carlisle of an experience he'd been witness to twice before.

Carlisle had lived long enough to know what Edward was getting at. His son, Emmett, had gone through something similar; if what he was thinking was the right idea. He didn't blame Edward for wanting to leave, and had a pretty good idea his son's mindset. _But Esme…_

"I can't stay. I'm sorry. I need to clear my head." The words were out before his thought was finished, a flash of guilt running through his eyes. "I'm weak." The words were a whisper. "I've never felt so weak." He rubbed a hand through his hair and growled quietly.

"Stop it, it's not your fault." _Remember that Emmett had no control at all. You're far from weak, my son._

The younger boy shook his head, whether in denial or to clear his mind, only Edward knew. "I need to leave." He pushed away from Carlisle and walked quickly to the door. "I'll… I'll come back. I don't know when…" He didn't sound so sure about the coming back part.

"Be safe, my son. Call us if you need anything." _Please be careful._

"I will." Carlisle had no way of knowing what Edward was answering, his thoughts or his words. Edward walked out of the room without even looking back. "Tell Esme I'm sorry." He stated quietly, his voice easily carrying to his father.

_There's nothing to be sorry for. She'll understand._

"Thank you." The voice was a whisper on the wind, even as Carlisle caught Edward's scent racing out of the hospital.

Sensing him go, Carlisle frowned and fished out his phone, deciding on calling Esme himself, to see if the others had said anything about Edward's strange behavior. Of course, as soon as he had his phone out, it began ringing and the caller ID read Alice's name. _I'm not surprised._ He thought as he answered it quickly. "What's going on, Alice?"

He listened, his eyes widening a little before narrowing. "I see. Thank you, but I think you should have warned him ahead of time." _I was right. It is just like with Emmett. We'll need to be very careful, then._ He paused. "I'm aware he'll probably come back… By next week…? That's fairly soon." He'd expected Edward to need more than a few days. He nodded. "Alright, listen. Just take good care of Esme for me until I get home, ok?" Listening for a moment, he smiled. "Alright, I'll see you guys when I get back."

He hung up without even saying goodbye, and sat against his desk, holding his son's car keys. Looking at them, he hoped Edward would get back quickly, and sighed before pocketing the keys, and heading out of the office and continuing on his job.

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I don't know if Alice had a vision of Bella when she came to Forks, or what she might have known/saw. I also don't know if Carlisle was able to place Edward's reaction to Bella as similar to Emmett's reaction to the strangers he encountered before… This is all just how I thought the hospital scene with Edward and Carlisle _could_ have gone.

Hope you like it.

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	9. Eyes

**JuseaPeterson** - Thank you. :) It's more difficult for me to do Edward at all, because not only do I have to put myself into the head of a seventeen year old boy (well, technically a 107 year old man trapped in a seventeen year old boy's body), but also because he's a vampire, he can read minds, and he's falling in love for the first time. There are a lot of angels to watch out for.

I did notice that with Edward's fight for her blood, I didn't mention the mind reading. That's my worries about doing the vampires' POVs, because they have so many different worries, it's hard to keep them all straight.

I had to put in the bit about Esme, because I knew it would bother her that Edward just took off, and I knew that Carlisle would think of her quickly, unconsciously, and even despite his pain and fears, Edward would, too. You know? It's ok, Rosalie is a hard character to understand, because the layers of depth are more subtle and hard to find.

Yeah, I've jumped a week here, or a few days there with my Diary story. I also had a recent dream idea for an Edward/Bella fic, that I haven't seen done before on fanfiction, so I'm trying my hand at that one, too. LOL. I have over a dozen multi-chapter Twilight fics in the works, and go to random ones at random times to work on them. LOL

**TriGemini** - Thank you :) Yes, I did know about her blank mind being a key factor, as well. I actually didn't realize I left it out of there. We could argue the fact that the _main_ thing on his mind when he went to Carlisle was that he almost gave in and killed her, and he (or Alice) could mention it to Carlisle upon returning. As I mentioned to JuseaPeterson, it's hard to keep everything in mind when writing for a vampire, just because there are so many things to think about.

Edward's curious about Bella. Curiosity killed the cat. Hm, I'm just glad Edward's not a cat. LOL.

**Note** : Hum, does anyone else find it ironic to watch Dr. Phil, and have a man named CHARLIE CULLEN, who's a police officer (or from some sort of security bureau) - :O - appear on it? (Totally Random, I know, but my jaw dropped! LOL)

**Book** : Twilight (the book), with a faint hint of Eclipse (you'll see at the end)

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I've seen a lot of things in my life, some pretty…weird; all a hazard of living in a huge city, of course. One thing I've never seen before are eyes that were unusual on an average day, let alone changing color randomly. And, no, I'm not talking mood-eyes that went blue one day, and green another.

When we first met, I'd seen Edward Cullen walk by me in the lunch room. I didn't even see his eyes, but from a distance they didn't seem all that unusual. They looked dark, and though I hadn't paid much attention at the time, I later found myself thinking it was because I figured they were black or dark brown. When I sat next to him in Biology II, _that's_ when I got a good look at his eyes.

They were pitch black.

Not black like usual human eyes, but coal black that glistened almost dangerously. It was both terrifying and somewhat exciting. His eyes were black as night, and matched the almost deadly aura he emanated as I sat next to him. They seemed to glitter like the most pure onyxes out there, enchanting, even as he glared at me.

I have no idea what it was that caused his reaction. I hadn't even had a chance to say one word. He stiffened up before I could even sit next to him! When I glanced at him, he glared back at me with inhumanly black eyes. He was rigid and his hands were curled into fists. He disappeared that day, as school let out. I remembered the last time I saw him; he was desperately trying to change out of his third period Biology class, to anything else. He glared at me then, too. I waited for about a week, hoping he would come back -while dreading facing him at the same time- just so I could confront him on his strange and offensive behavior.

It was a long week. I kept thinking about his strange behavior and the eyes that haunted me. Every day I glanced at his table, wondering if I'd be met by the same deadly black gaze. Every day, I found myself bizarrely disappointed when he wasn't there; when it was just his four siblings.

Monday was when he finally came back.

After a week of no sighting, I'd begun to settle into my daily routine. I'm not ashamed to admit I still glanced to the Cullen table every day at lunch, wondering briefly if he'd come back, but in all honesty, I'd stopped expecting to see him. For the rest of the week, only Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie -Good thing I'd paid attention when Jessica told me their names- sat there, alone, and acting like nothing was wrong. When I saw him Monday, I felt my heart splutter. I couldn't see his eyes, and I didn't look long. I was afraid to see him glaring at me again.

I wasn't sure what I wanted to do; go to the office and plead sick, or go to my next class, knowing that he'd be there. I allowed myself one glance, and I watched as he laughed with his family, shaking the snow out of his hair, after Emmett.

Of course, Jessica decided to ask -quite loudly- what I was staring at, and it caught his attention. I dropped my gaze only seconds after he turned to look at me, but in that short amount of time, I was certain he didn't seem angry, only confused. I could feel him staring at me, his eyes trying to burn a hole in the back of my head. For a brief moment, I was certain his eyes were lighter today, but I couldn't be sure.

"Edward Cullen is staring at you."

I glanced at Jessica, but didn't have the guts to turn towards the Cullens. We spoke quietly, and I asked her if he looked angry. I kind of wondered if I should have said anything, when she gave me a confused look and shook her head, responding 'no'. I knew she'd be asking me questions all day long, aside from the immediate 'Should he be?' she asked seconds after answering my previous question. I still couldn't look over.

I carefully kept my eyes on our own table for the remainder of lunch period.

Biology was…confusing. I was hesitant to go, but I had promised myself that if Edward wasn't glaring at me, I'd go, so… When I entered the room, I was one of the first people there, and I quickly took my seat. _Hah! I'm here first. If he doesn't want to sit beside me, he can just leave._ I thought triumphantly, before pushing the thought aside with a flush. I opened my books and focused on them as people began filing into the room.

I purposely ignored them, knowing I'd meet some of the still curious eyes if I did, and I risked meeting _his_ eyes. I knew he didn't seem upset in the lunch room, but would he react the same in class?

I heard clearly when the chair next to me moved.

"Hello." He looked at me with an open, friendly smile. Maybe he didn't notice my evident shock as I looked up. "My name is Edward Cullen. I didn't have a chance to introduce myself last week. You must be Bella Swan."

We worked on a project for Biology II, talking easily. Or rather, he spoke easily. I flushed and fluttered around like a fish out of water. It was shortly after the science experiment when I found myself gazing at his face. I'd noticed earlier that something was different about his face. It was slightly flushed from the snow, but I knew that wasn't what was bugging me.

For a moment, I wished I could read his mind. By now he must certainly have considered me insane. First my babbling about my dad calling me 'Isabella' behind my back, when he -Edward- was the first one to get my name right; then I stared at him like a love-struck puppy when he smiled at me -can you blame me? Have you _seen_ his smile??- Then I just stared at his face, like some obsessed fan-girl.

I couldn't help it. I kept trying to figure out what was so different about him, today, besides his attitude.

It finally hit me. "Did you get contacts?" I wanted to smack myself for the odd question, but it was valid.

Last week, his eyes had been dark and threatening. Today, they were a light topaz color. Still very unusual. They were very beautiful, but I'd never seen a color like it before.

He frowned in confusion, even as his eyes tightened. "No." He opened his mouth, as if wanting to say something more, but shrugged and looked away, his hands curling into fists again.

I nodded to myself. _But, they were black. Either he's lying or he's got mood eyes._ I thought to myself, trying not to snicker at the idea of eyes that changed color with one's mood. "Oh. I thought there was something different about your eyes." Ok, so I _knew_ there was something different about his eyes, but it would sound silly to argue the fact in the middle of a Biology class.

**(A Year Later)**

It was so unusual to me at the time. I'd never seen eyes that changed colors, before. Or eyes that tended to be some shade of topaz or another. It was even more confusing when I saw that his whole family; his whole _adopted_ had eyes in varying shades of amber and topaz, except for Jasper, whose eyes seemed always almost pitch black. Then again, before I'd moved to Forks, I'd never met a vampire, either.

Now, as I found myself looking into his dark caramel eyes and watching as he raised an eyebrow -making the light blue bruises under his eyes more pronounced- I sighed. "Edward, you need to go eat-err…drink….whatever." I shook my head, ignoring his laughter as I stared into his eyes. Even after so long, it still made me a little awkward to talk about his…feeding habits. It wasn't really that it made me uncomfortable, just that I wasn't sure how to refer to it.

I think it was more the fact that I couldn't stand the sight or smell of blood, than anything else. Briefly I wondered, how would that affect me when I was a vampire?

He still grinned as he walked over and wrapped his arms around my frame, holding me tightly against his chest. "Bella, you only just got back. I'd like to spend a _little _time with you."

"I was only gone for the weekend." I protested. My back was to his chest; he'd caught me as I was turning away to grab my backpack from where it lay in the doorway.

"And yet, you know how being away from you makes me feel." His soft reply was barely more than a breath against my neck as he breathed softly. He carefully pressed his lips to the hollow of my throat and stayed there. I knew he was 'enjoying the bouquet while resisting the wine', as he liked to call it. "I have missed you, love."

"And I've missed you." I admitted, feeling my face warm up. "A lot, but you need to feed." I struggled in his hold until he loosened his hold long enough for me to turn and bury my face in his chest. "I don't like you starving yourself."

He chuckled and ran a cold hand through my hair. "If it makes you feel better, I have plans to hunt with Emmett, Jasper and Carlisle in two days. Alice says it's supposed to be sunny that day, so I can't very well go to school, now, can I?"

"You can." I muttered quietly. "I'd only have to take a baseball bat with me to keep the girls away." I felt him laugh and paused. "Wait, I practically have to do that, anyways."

Edward busted up laughing and buried his face in my shoulder, his icy breath freezing it in a short amount of time.

"It's not funny." I muttered darkly, remembering how tall, brunette and buxom Ashley Granger hit on him right in front of me, last week. I'd never been so mad, not even when he pulled a traffic jam in front of the school, just so Tyler had a chance to ask me to the dance. I still wasn't letting _that_ go, by the way.

Sighing, Edward pulled me against him and leaned against the wall lightly. We were standing next to the huge glass doors that led to the woods, on the second story of the Cullen household, in Edward's room. I'd come straight here from the airport, after calling Charlie to let him know I was back and safe. "If this is about last week…" Even if he _couldn't_ read my mind, he still had an uncanny way of deciphering what I was thinking about. "You know I'm not interested in her."

"She's brunette." I mumbled under my breath. "And gorgeous."

I felt him shake his head and his cool hand come under my chin, very gently raising my face to his. His eyes were surprisingly light, despite him not having fed, and he looked at me with such affection that I forgot -once again- how to breathe. "She's _nothing_." He insisted in the softest voice I'd ever heard. "_You're_ everything to me. _You_ are my life now; my life ever. _You_ are the one I love." With that, he leaned down and kissed me softly, his lips promising so much, even as he brushed an icy hand down my cheek.

I raised my hands to hold on to his cold face, even as I kissed him back, and felt him tighten his hold on me. I felt myself begin to get lightheaded and with a pout, had to pull away so I could breathe.

"You are my heart and soul, love." Edward promised with a smile, holding up my left hand. Pointedly, he gazed at the diamond engagement ring on it before leaning down to kiss it softly.

I felt myself melt against him, all thoughts of Ashley Granger long since forgotten. Of course he was right. I mean, when she _had_ come on to him, he'd pulled me closer and raised my hand with the diamond ring on it before _pointedly_ telling her his 'fiancée' might not like that. I stared up into his eyes and sighed, leaning right in against him, despite the cool marble feel of his body. "You are my reason for being."

Staring into his liquid topaz eyes, I smiled and leaned up, kissing him softly.

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**Note** : The 'hint of Eclipse' was the engagement ring. LOL.

Hope you like it.

Written December 13, 2008

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	10. Walking Dead

**Disclaimer** : I don't own a lot of the quotes, like 'living dead', 'cross my heart and hope to die', 'kicked your puppy', etc, etc.

**TriGemini** - Yes, I agree. I believe Bella is so much good to Edward. His heart and soul, even his conscience. And yes, when she first saw him, she thought it was intense anger, not a hunger, that made his eyes black. I'm really glad you liked this and got what I was getting at. :)

**JuseaPeterson** - I know. It gets a little easier with practice, but I still find human minds are easier to work with. Esme is very kind, so yes, it is easier to include her. LOL, thank you. I just go to one of the stories randomly, a day, and work on an extra chapter or two. My 'Bella's Diary' is coming along nicely, and the easiest one to go back to at any given time, so I might post that one, next.

I'm glad you liked the chapter. I'm trying to do a similar thing for Edward, that I did for John Sheppard in Stargate Atlantis. It was another fiction I did, where I found specific points about his character and focused on them. This one is only different, because some of the chapters are random events and conversations, not all focusing on one aspect.

This was kind of a random ramble one day, but I figured it could fit into my one-shots story, so... I'm sorry about the late update, I've been very busy, but I'm back now. LOL

P.S. - I didn't know what else to call it, so... It's supposed to be a little cute, with all the quotes.

**Book** : References to marriage and changing, so... Between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn?

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**(Bella's POV)**

Walking up the stairs to my room, Friday night, I ignored the bathroom. I walked right into my room, turned, and locked the door before turning around. I gasped in surprise, though I knew I shouldn't have been surprised at this point. There, sitting on the edge of my bed with a face paler than usual, was Edward Cullen.

"Edward?" I kept my voice low as I walked over to him. I sat down across from him on the bed and took in the grim expression on his face. "What's wrong? You look like someone just kicked your puppy."

His eyes raised from examining my bed sheets to my face, and he frowned a moment. His eyes were dark ochre, but there were no hollows under them to signify his hunger. "'Kicked my...' I don't have a puppy."

I knew something was up. He was acting distracted, and I was certain that after about ninety years of travelling this earth, he'd heard the saying 'kicked your puppy' before. "It's an expression." I deadpanned, staring him in the eyes. I had to struggle to keep my mind in focus _and_ remember to breathe as he gazed at me expectantly.

Having to look away to form a coherent thought, I sighed. "Ok, let me rephrase. You look like the living..." I felt my face heat up as a small chuckle reached my ear, and I turned to find Edward's face alight with amusement. "Dead." I finished lamely.

His face was broken out into my favorite crooked grin, and all signs of grimness were gone. "Nothing's wrong, I promise."

Shaking my head, I raised an eyebrow at him and gave him a look that I knew bordered on a suspicious glare. "Right, and I'm the world's best cheerleader."

Now he smirked. "Will that be something I get to see?"

Blinking for a moment, I stared at him, unsure if he was being serious. I saw the expression of amusement still in his face. Immediately, I imagined myself in a cheerleading outfit, doing a high kick and my shoe flying off my foot to hit him smack in the center of the face -which, of course, wouldn't hurt him. I blushed and giggled automatically. "Hm... Maybe one day, if you're really unlucky." I ignored his laughter, even as he rolled his eyes at me. "But back on track. What's _really_ going on?"

He sighed, the amusement gone from his face. "I swear to you, everything is fine. I'm just being paranoid about one of Alice's visions." He raised a hand. "Everything's ok, though. Cross my heart and hope to, uh..." He trailed off.

"Live?" I offered innocently. "What was Alice's vision about?"

He shrugged, a slight twinkle in his eye, even though his expression was a hint tortured. "Well, apparently both Lauren and Jessica are going to be making passes on me all day, Monday, despite whatever I say to deter them."

I sighed deeply and shook my head. I really had to wonder if _he_ saw _himself _clearly, ever? He was absolutely stunning, and though he was convinced it was because he was a vampire, I knew better. Being a vampire only _enhanced_ his looks. He was already gorgeous before that.

"I just wish they'd get the message and leave me alone." Now he sounded irritated. "I just don't understand their fascination with me."

"You're gorgeous, smart, young, talented, kind..." I felt my face heat up as a grin crossed his face and he stared at me intently. "And it's not the vampire they're seeing. Hm, it's funny how most people love the dead. Once you've died, you've got it made." I felt my blush increase, realizing my words could be taken in many ways.

Looking at me a moment, Edward's face was unreadable. "I'm considering skipping Monday." He finally admitted. "I'm tired of having to deal with those two girls."

"You'll just have to deal with them the rest of the week." I reminded him seriously. "And I'm not sure about you, but I kind of prefer having you there." I allowed the pout to form on my lips, watching as his eyes darkened. I gave him my best hurt, pleading glance. "Please, Edward? We'll find a way to make them back off." I hitched my voice a little quieter. "Please...?"

His eyes widened momentarily before narrowing. He stared at me and leaned in all of a sudden. His lips were icy against my own, but my body suddenly felt hot as his sweet scent washed over me. I leaned forward, crawling across the bed to get closer to him. All of a sudden, my hand slipped off the edge of the bed, and I gasped as I started to fall. I should have realized by now, Edward would catch me. "Your luck, my love, is absolutely horrid." He was chuckling against my lips.

"Yes, yes." I nodded as he pulled me to him. "With my luck, if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying." I was pressed firmly against his chest and felt him shake with laughter. "Or I'd be the first one to die." I muttered quietly, remembering all the people I had after me. Edward's body froze and I struggled to think fast. "Not that I'm afraid of death, I just don't wanna be there when it happens." I closed my mouth with an audible snap and lightly slapped my forehead with my hand, sighing as he began to laugh even harder. _What is _with_ me today?! _He had to bury his face in my shoulders to keep the sounds from leaking out of the room, despite the fact that Charlie wasn't home tonight.

It took him several moments to calm down, and he sighed, shaking his head. "And yet you want to become a vampire." He didn't sound pleased, but I was happy to notice he didn't sound as repulsed by the idea as he was before.

"There's a difference."

"Either way you die." He hissed, his body rigid and his tone harsh.

I nodded. "But if I turn, I can still spend eternity with you. I don't call that being dead. I'd still be living, even if I didn't have a heartbeat." I was thinking out loud by now. "I'd get to be by your side as long as we both li-uh, exist." I paused as something hit me. "Unless...you don't _want_ me by your side." I felt my heart sink and mentally cursed myself as I realized that had come out too wrong.

Once again Edward stiffened, and he growled slightly before sighing. His body never relaxed, though. "Bella, don't be silly. Of course I want you by my side. I just refuse to kill you to get what I want."

"And if something happened? If I was dying already?"

His grip tightened. "_Not_ going to happen."

"I'm not saying it is." I already knew I'd lost the option, if I stayed perfectly healthy and unhurt, but with my clumsiness there was always the chance I could get seriously injured. "I'm just saying 'what if'? Would you let me die, knowing I wouldn't be able to rest in peace?"

"I'd be right behind you, love."

"No!" Shaking my head, I struggled against his hold until he finally released me, obviously for fear of hurting me if he didn't. "Don't _ever_ talk like that!" I hissed angrily, feeling tears well up in my eyes. I struggled to keep my voice low as I got up, tripping, stumbled over to the far wall. "You'd really rather die than spend eternity with me?" The pain from that blow was incredibly more than I ever could have imagined. I was speaking loudly and aware of myself trembling as I stood with my back against the door.

Edward winced sharply and looked at the bed.

"Answer me." I glared at him as he seemed to struggle for words. "_ANSWER ME_!" I yelled.

His head snapped up, his eyes pitch black now. "Be quiet!" He hissed.

"Afraid I'm gonna wake the dead?" I muttered darkly.

Edward's expression was comical. He looked like he was struggling to remain serious, but I could see the amusement swirling around in his features. After a moment, he sighed. "Already awake, love." He raised a hand, probably sensing my mouth was opening to retort. "Let me think." He took a moment. "That's not what I meant at all. I'd give anything to become human for you-"

"I don't want that." I cut him off. Seeing his hurt look, I narrowed my eyes and walked over. "I swear you are just _begging_ to be slapped. Stop being so incredibly impossible. Don't even _think_ I wouldn't love you as a human, Edward, because it would make no difference to me. I'd love you either way." I sat on the far edge of the bed.

"But, I don't want you human. Then you'd age and die. Not to mention, you'd be too vulnerable. You could get shot, stabbed, beaten, hit by a car, fall down stairs and break something vital, mauled by a wild animal, poisoned..." I raised an eyebrow. "Need I continue? No, I don't want you human; It'd be too easy to lose you then."

His face had twisted into a pained, tortured look. He realized how much I worried about him, and my love for him, but this was a subject he refused to go back on. "I don't want to kill you. I don't even know if I'd be able to _stop_ once I start. Plus, you're _so_ young!"

"Yeah, I'm a kid." I grumbled darkly. I knew that wasn't what he meant, but every time he stated that, I felt like a baby next to him. It only reminded me that he was over 100 years old, compared to my measly 17.

He glared at me. "That's _not_ what I meant! Can't you wait another year?"

Shaking my head, I gave him a stubborn look. "No. After graduation, I agreed to marry you so you could change me. Did you plan on backing out?" His glare darkened. "Then no, not another year." Turning, I climbed beneath the covers and turned away. I felt heavy with pain and remorse, and knew that by morning I'd be apologizing left, right and center for saying what I did. For the moment, I kept my back to him and struggled to ignore the tears I felt rolling over my cheeks, even as my body continued to tremble.

"I won't back out, I promise. I just wish you'd give me a little more time." When I didn't answer, he sighed loudly. I felt him moving and a moment later, I felt his cold arms around me, over the blanket. He held me close and used his thumb to wipe away the tears. "Don't cry, love. We'll work this out, I promise."

"Cross your heart and hope to live?" I asked quietly, after a moment.

There was a chuckle. "Yes. Cross my heart and hope to live."

Turning, I curled into him and felt him place a light kiss into my hair. By this point, I was so tired, I didn't even have the energy to tilt my head up for a real kiss. Even so, I felt his hand under my chin and allowed him to do the tilting for me. There was a soft laugh, and the next thing I know his icy lips were pressed against my own. I kissed him back with all the energy I had left, falling asleep with my lips still fastened to his, and a soft whisper.

"I love you."

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Hope you like it.

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	11. Temper

**JuseaPeterson** - I'm trying. It's just a little annoying that I've got about two dozen Twilight stories in the works, and I'm bouncing back and forth on which one my muse supports. LOL. Ah, well.

Exactly. Edward keeps going on about wanting to become human for Bella, and though it has it's upsides, it makes him mortal and vulnerable. Two things Bella can't stand. The mortality, because he could be hurt, and he'll age and eventually die. And vulnerable, because like I said, there's just too many ways to die. It was just a random thing, but I wanted to go for a little humor in it, which is where the lines came from. LOL.

Poor Edward? Are we forgetting that a sneaker between the eyes won't hurt him, but it'll completely humiliate Bella? I'd say poor Bella. LOL. I'm glad you liked it, though. :)

**TriGemini** - I can understand both their points of view, really. That could very well be why the topic bothers Edward so much (besides the killing Bella and 'condemning' her to a soulless existence part). The idea that if he wants to keep Bella around, he'd _have_ to change her at some point, and he doesn't want to admit that part to himself. I liked it when Bella took the decision out of his hands, with the family vote.

Yeah, when I read about his lack of belief about having a soul, I knew it was garbage. I mean, the soul is the kindness and compassion and the ability to do good, generous things, and the ability to love. His entire family has all that in abundance, and I believe that vampire or not, they'd all have souls.

Don't worry about it. I like hearing people's opinions, and sometimes they can inspire me for new chapter ideas. Right now I have a rough muse for a 'Soul' chapter because of your review. :) I'm glad you liked it.

**Book** : Twilight

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**(Edward's POV)**

When I entered the lunch room, my head told me to go sit at the usual table, where I saw the others looking at me. Maybe Jasper sensed my discomfort, because he sent me a confused look. Alice grinned and flashed me a thumbs up, showing her full support of the decision my heart had made. Rosalie looked thoroughly upset when I walked past them to the food lineup, grabbed a tray of food, and walked to an empty table across the room, and Emmett just looked lost.

You might wonder why I wasn't sitting with my family, today. Well, I got tired of staying away from Bella Swan.

I waited patiently at the table, my mind running over our earlier conversation. I hadn't been able to help but pull the traffic jam yesterday, even as I picked up the mental warning from Jasper about Bella's anger. I couldn't read her mind, but there was no doubt in my mind, she wanted to hurt me…or bang up my car, whichever came first. I knew it upset her, and a small part of me felt bad for it, but that didn't last long compared to my amusement at her irritation.

When she entered the cafeteria, I didn't even have to look at her to know it. I could smell her. I did look up, though, and I noticed right away as she glanced at our usual table; looking for me, no doubt. I watched as her eyes tightened but she smiled at something Jessica was saying. I wasn't paying too much attention to Jessica. That is, until she glanced my way. Her 'mind' flared up and I bit back the urge to roll my eyes.

"Edward Cullen is staring at you again." She glanced at me, and I looked away, knowing she was planning to wave at me if I looked back. I tried to keep from encouraging her as much as possible. "I wonder why he's sitting alone, today?" I looked over, firmly keeping my eyes locked on Bella. It wasn't a difficult task, the strange new girl was very intriguing.

Bella's head swung to me so fast, I had to struggle not to laugh at her shell shocked look. As our eyes locked, I grinned and raised a hand, gesturing her over with my finger, throwing in a wink for good measure when she stared at me in obvious disbelief. She blushed, of course. I don't know why, but I found her easy blush endearing. She looked away and my eyes narrowed at Jessica's vaguely insulting 'does he mean _you_?!'. _And what's wrong with _her_?_ Bella shot out some possible excuse and wandered over, standing behind the chair across from me with clear nervousness in her eyes.

I felt my throat tighten and begin to burn as her tantalizing scent washed over us. It was annoying, but not nearly as bad as the first day she'd sat with me. I still wondered how it was I hadn't killed everyone in that room, just to get to her.

I emptied my mind of those thoughts before they could arouse my hunger even more.

"Why don't you sit with me today?" I grinned at her as she sat down, clearly not really certain what to expect. We got talking, and I relaxed a little. I knew she didn't know what to expect; honestly, neither did I. My hunger flared up, but only a little. It was easy to control, even though her thumping heartbeat was so very tempting. She asked me questions, I threw her my usual, purposely mysterious answers, and smirked to myself when I saw her getting irritated.

In all honesty, I didn't really know _what_ to say. Sometimes I actually found myself wishing I had Alice's ability of seeing the future, so I could base the conversation on knowing what each response would ellicit. Part of me wanted to scream 'I'm a freaking vampire, stupid!', but I knew that wouldn't turn out well. Besides, that really wouldn't go far with the whole 'secret identity' thing we were going for. I had to be so very careful not to give too much information in what I said, and despite my worries, I always felt like I did.

Of course, she'd then tell me she didn't understand, and I'd be able to relax.

"You say that a lot." She muttered darkly after the third time I've tried to warn her I wasn't the best person to be friends with.

"Yes." I felt my own irritation beginning to flare up, but a soft sense of calming was sent my way, and I glanced surreptitiously at Jasper and Alice. I wasn't surprised to see them watching our interaction, and though I felt annoyed at their intrusion -that promptly faded, and Jasper smirked at me- I also felt gratitude they were helping me to control my temper. I turned back to Bella. "Because you're not listening to me. I'm still waiting for you to believe it. If you're smart, you'll stay away from me." It was easy to stay nonchalant when you had Jasper backing you and keeping you neutral.

Her eyes narrowed, and I suddenly realized I'd said the wrong thing. _Crap!_ Even as a vampire, I'd learned to never insult a woman's intelligence, and look at what I just did. Alice looked offended for Bella and Jasper winced. Bella's face turned pink, and I knew it was from anger, rather than embarrassment. "I think you've made your opinion on the subject of my intelligence clear, too." She stated lowly.

I could only smile apologetically. There was nothing I could say that would make it right, that also wouldn't give too much away or dig myself deeper. I watched as she glanced to her bottle and fiddled with it uncomfortably. She was silent, but from the look on her face, her mind was racing through a lot.

"What are you thinking?" I tried not to frown too deeply. It was so annoying not being able to read her mind. She was the only one, and I often found myself trying to understand why that was. What was so special about her? I never really thought too much on my gift; at times I've even found it annoying, but with Bella, I never wished more that I could read someone's thoughts.

She looked at me, her eyes confused. She stared at me a moment and seemed to answer without even thinking about it. "I'm trying to figure out what you are." She fired automatically.

If I'd had a heart, it would have stopped beating at that. I felt my entire body stiffen up, and clenched my fists. I was aware that my tension would be visible, but I struggled to keep the smile on my face as I stared at her. "Are you having any luck with that?" I struggled to keep my tone offhand.

Her expression was thoughtful, and I wondered if she noticed how her words had affected me. She shook her head. "Not too much."

I was able to relax again, and I nodded. "What are your theories?" _I wish I didn't have to ask._ Briefly, I wondered if she'd be anywhere near, or at all original.

Her face turned a deep red that would put tomatoes to shame. She looked down at her bottle, then up at me, but she refused to meet my eyes.

"Won't you tell me?" I tilted my head to the side and smiled at her. I was just teasing, but her face turned even redder. She met my eyes, shook her head and told me it was 'too embarrassing'. "That's _really_ frustrating, know you." I muttered darkly, with a sigh.

Her response was surprisingly quick and serious. "No." Her eyes darkened and narrowed. "I can't _imagine_ why that would be frustrating at all." The sarcasm in her voice was so thick, I could have cut it with a knife. I was surprised she was able to keep her voice down. "Just because someone refuses to tell you what they're thinking, even if all the while they're making cryptic little comments specifically designed to keep you up at night, wondering what they could possibly mean… Now why would that be frustrating?"

I couldn't help but grimace. She'd hit too close to home, and I realized that she was entirely more observant than I'd originally thought. I tried to think up something to say, but she continued before I could even open my mouth.

"Or better…" She raised her eyebrows briefly. "Say that personal also did a wide range of bizarre things."

I knew where she was going, and wondered if she'd ever let it drop.

The sarcasm was still oozing out with each word. "From saving your life under impossible circumstances one day, to treating you like a pariah the next, and never explained any of that, either, even after he promised. That, also, would be _very_ non-frustrating." She breathed deeply and glowered at me.

I raised an eyebrow, caught off guard by her reaction. _Hm, feisty._ "You've got a bit of a temper, don't you?"

She frowned and looked down. "I don't like double standards." She'd looked back up and stared at me, her face completely serious.

I stared back just as seriously. I wasn't used to people standing up to me, so it was a bit of a shock, but it was also…kind of nice. Someone who _wasn't_ falling all over me. She was a mystery; one I was intent on figuring out. Bella Swan was a living contradiction.

_What is he doing to her?! I swear, if he's hurting her… Maybe I should go interrupt…_

My eyes were drawn over to the table she usually sat at, and I caught Mike glaring at me angrily. Of course, as soon as my eyes locked on him, he looked away, but I could still hear him debating on coming over. I couldn't help but chuckle at the thought.

"What?"

Looking back at Bella, I shook my head. "Your boyfriend seems to think I'm being unpleasant to you. He's debating whether or not to come break up our fight." The word 'boyfriend' left a very strange taste of bitterness in my mouth, but I hid it well. It didn't escape Jasper's notice, however, and I knew I was in for some serious questioning tonight.

She frowned, confusion and irritation marring her voice. As I stared into her eyes, she seemed completely sincere in her following words. "I don't know who you're talking about…" I could tell she really didn't and surprisingly it made me feel better. "But I'm sure you're wrong, anyway."

I shook my head. _Oh, if only you knew what I was capable of._ "I'm not." I knew my voice was confident. "I told you, most people are easy to read." I couldn't help but grin at the gross understatement.

"Except me, of course." She deadpanned.

_Right. There's that._ My mood sobered, and I frowned as I stared at her. _That really _is_ irritating._ "Yes. Except for you, of course." I couldn't help but stare at her as I struggled to think it out. _Does she have some way of blocking me? Maybe she has exceptional mental control?_ None of it seemed to fit a seventeen year old girl in high school. But then, maybe she wasn't just a seventeen year old girl attending high school. "I wonder why that is." Maybe she has secrets? No, something told me she seriously didn't. Not like ours, anyways.

She stared at me a moment and flushed pink before looking down at her bottle of lemonade. She pulled the cap off and took a sip before playing with the cap, her stare blank. It hit me then that she didn't have any food.

_Didn't Carlisle say humans had to eat multiple times a day?_ You'd think I'd remember that from my human time, but I honestly didn't. Still, I'd seen her usually getting something to eat, so her lack of food aroused my curiosity. "Aren't you hungry?" She'd pulled this once before, too, I recalled. _Maybe she just doesn't eat lunch every day._

Shaking her head, Bella looked up through her lashes at me. I don't think she realized how mysterious and breath-taking that made her seem. It was a very flattering look. Her face was still slightly flushed, and for a moment I swore her eyes swallowed me whole. Then her voice broke me out of the short trance. "No." She stated simply with a shrug, before looking pointedly at the untouched tray of food in front of me. "How about you?"

I shook my head and couldn't fight back the grin. _I had venison two nights ago. Bloody good stuff, too_. She really didn't need to know that, though. "No, I'm not hungry." I stated.

Her eyes narrowed, and for a moment I was sure she was going to get worked up again, but instead, she looked down at her bottle. Our table was quiet for a bit.

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I left it off there, because to keep going would have been to make it longer, and I figured it was long enough.

Hope you like it

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	12. Shield

**JuseaPeterson** - Well, not really frustrating. It is annoying I can't focus on any _one_ story, but at least I can go back to each of these stories at any given time and continue them on. I do it all the time. I always end up leaving off at an easy-to-continue-from point.

Awww, now I really want to be able to read Midnight Sun! :( My computer doesn't handle the type of file it comes in. Thank you though, I'm happy to hear you liked it and that it went at all along with SM's book. I try to keep my characters as in character as possible. :)

**TriGemini** - Ahh, it was a tough call. Put up 'Soul' right away, or this one. I just chose this one out of randomness. LOL. I did finish 'Soul' though, and I'm kind of happy how it came out.

I can imagine the frustration between them. When Edward caused the traffic jam and his cool attitude of laughing at her when she got upset, I found annoying. I can see his point of view, but I kind of side with Bella about that being annoying. Girl thing, maybe? I know I'd be irritated if I was mad and he was laughing at me. Hmmm...

Sorry about the late update. I've been away and I've recently come to have a little trouble with the site, in uploading my documents. I hope to get it fixed A.S.A.P so I can keep updating! Thank you for sticking with me. :) I would have updated yesterday, but had troubles with the site.

**Note** : It's just a random thought I had about Bella, when talking to **JuseaPeterson** about her abilities and personality.

**Book** : Breaking Dawn

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**(Edward's POV)**

Looking over my beautiful wife as she gazed out the window, I thought about everything we'd learned. The final standoff against the Volturi had gone shocking well. I winced.

_Ok, maybe not for Irina._

Yet, I should have expected that to happen. She'd gone to the Volturi, making a claim that wasn't confirmed or positive. We all should have expected them to turn on her to save their reputation. In fact, part of me was certain that's exactly what Irina knew was going to happen. The look in her eyes, I hadn't had a chance to read her mind before the Volturi had acted, but I was certain she knew it was coming.

Eleazar's words came back to me.

**Flashback**

"A very talented family. A mind reader for a father, and a shield for a mother; and then whatever magic this extraordinary child has bewitched us with." Eleazar was pacing at a vampire speed back and forth in the house. Flashing from one point to the next as he seemed to be trying to work something out.

Everyone had grown still at his words, though he didn't seem to notice. He continued to ramble on about what possible power Renesmee had, and if it was an all new one or something normal for a vampire-human hybrid.

Then he'd catch himself and recall that vampire-human hybrids were far from normal themselves.

"Excuse me." My mind was wrapped around what he'd said. _A shield?_ Reaching out, I took his arm as he went to pace past me again. "What did you just call my wife?'

Eleazar stopped and focused on me, his furious pacing seemingly forgotten. "A shield, I _think._ I can't be certain, she's blocking me now."

**End Flashback**

All my time trying to understand why I couldn't read Bella's mind. I always thought she was simply immune to my ability. Even when it came to Jane and Aro, again I thought it was an immunity. How could I ever have imagined my wife could have such a powerful talent as a human being??

Bella turned to me, her eyes curious. "What's wrong?"

I couldn't help the small smile. She'd always been beautiful to me, but never in my wildest fantasies could I have imagined we'd be in this position. That we'd be married, have a beautiful and talented daughter, that Bella would be a vampire, or that she could possibly become more beautiful than she already was. "Nothing at all, love." I held out a hand and watched as she gracefully walked over. She could have used her vampiric speed, but she seemed to like taking her time.

Her eyes were a gorgeous tan, and her hair flowed around her silkily, making me want to run my fingers through it. Though I, too, was a vampire, I often found myself dazzled by the beauty that is Bella's new form. She hadn't changed all that much, to be honest, but she was the most stunning creature I'd ever seen. It made me wonder about myself, through her eyes.

Which reminded me of the first time she lowered her shield and allowed me to read her mind. Her thoughts were of me, filled with her thoughts and feelings in so many occasions when she'd seen me. From when she first laid eyes on me, and how I looked in her eyes, to when we claimed our love for each other, to when I fought James -what she could remember of the battle- and when I told her I didn't want her...

I _still_ winced at that memory.

But her love and awe was so plain in her thoughts. It was...enlightening to see myself through her eyes. I didn't see the monster I saw when I looked in the mirror. I saw a boy, a man. I saw someone capable of loving and being loved.

Bella's eyes narrowed a little and she cocked her head sideways a bit. "You've been staring at me for hours."

_Really?_ I hadn't noticed the time; had I really been staring at her so long? "I apologize if I bothered you. I was caught up in memories."

"Good ones, I hope." She raised an eyebrow elegantly and allowed me to pull her flush against my body. "It didn't bother me." She kissed me lightly a moment.

I held her tightly against me as I laid back on the bed. She curled up into me so she was resting partially on top of me. "I was remembering Eleazar's words. When he finally explained what you are and why I couldn't read your mind." I chuckled a little. "Of all the things, I never even considered that your immunity to my mind reading was a talent like ours."

She nodded. "And here I was certain my talent was my unnatural control over myself."

That made me pause. It was very true she had the unnatural ability to skip right over the blood lusting newborn part. She'd always had remarkable control. "Maybe it is. For all I know, you have more than one ability."

"Hmm. A mind reader for a father, and a shield for a mother." Bella quietly repeated Eleazar's words as she absently drew figures on my chest with her fingertips.

"A shield. It makes perfect sense, and I really feel I should have figured it out before." I pursed my lips. "Even your personality was that of a shield, so to speak. You protect. In so many ways. You can lie somewhat convincingly-" I ignored the sting of the swat she gave me. In all honesty, she'd gotten better at lying. "When you're trying to protect someone. You're willing to face hungry vampires just to protect those you love... You're quiet and soft spoken to protect yourself." I blinked as her hands stilled. "You're a protector."

She'd paused as she listened to my words. Her breathing was steady, and her body was relaxed. "Hmm..." She began drawing again. "I never really thought about it like that. But me? A protector? Are you forgetting I couldn't walk across a stable flat surface without finding _something_ to trip over?" Her voice was dry, and she shook a little with silent laughter.

I nodded, recalling all the times she tripped or fell, or dropped something. "That's true, but it didn't stop you when you faced off against James. It didn't stop you when you ran to me to save me from my own suicidal tendencies." I felt her body stiffen up and she stopped breathing a moment. I ran my hand over her back lightly, trying to soothe her. "It didn't factor in when you faced off against the Volturi." Squeezing her arm a little, I looked down the same time she looked up and I smiled. "Everything's ok, love."

Relaxing against me, Bella nodded, though her eyes were haunted. "Jane's mine." Her tone was low and deadly. "If the Volturi ever come back for us, that...that _witch_-" I knew that wasn't the word she was looking for. "Is mine!" She let out a low rumbling growl that echoed through the room, promising violence to Jane.

"Bella?" I wasn't used to such a violent response.

Lifting herself up, she got up and straddled my waist. She placed her hands on the sides of my head and closed her eyes, clearly concentrating. I felt something like an energy bubble push out away from her, and suddenly I could read her mind.

**Flashback**

....Jane was smiling evilly at us. Her look ran from Alice to Bella, but lingered on me. Suddenly, I was on the floor. I winced as the memory of the agony I was in caught in my mind, and for a moment it was like I was living it all over. But it wasn't the same.

No, I wasn't holding my stomach. I wasn't rolling around on the ground in utter agony. I was watching through another set of eyes. Alice was beside me, and it hit me I was looking through Bella's eyes. I was still experiencing agony, almost as unbearable as the agony Jane had inflicted on me, but it was Bella's pain. She was showing me why remembering the Volturi and Jane made her so upset....

....A flash, and suddenly I was standing on top of a cliff. I was looking out over a vast ocean and feeling completely empty inside. Some part of me was screaming-No, I was in Bella again. Some part of her was screaming how stupid this was, and I could even hear my voice telling her not to do it. She ignored everything, ran and jumped off the cliff....

It hit me briefly that these memories were dull and fuzzy, as most human memories were.

...She was standing with Jessica Stanley on the street, staring at a group of familiar-looking men. I almost growled when images came to my mind, showing where she recognized them from. She took a step forward, and my voice told her to stop. She didn't understand at first and I felt the agonizing hope that dared to rise in her chest as she looked around for me. It fled quickly when she realized I wasn't there, and I was left feeling her emptiness...

...She was riding a motorbike, but my voice startled her and she hit the wrong brake. It sent her flying. I couldn't see her since I was looking through her eyes, but Jacob showed up and tossed the bike off her. She tried to play it off as she was fine, but he pointed out she was bleeding, which she belatedly noticed. It didn't deter her, though. She wanted to get right back on that bike as soon as possible, a new, vain hope of hearing my voice, filling her a little...

...Alice was standing in the doorway of Charlie's house, an utterly horrified and shocked look. I felt a fresh wave of pain run over me, and I almost cried out in agony at it. She told Bella and Jacob that I'd been told Bella was dead. Bella's eyes widened in horror and I noticed how dead she _did_ look. Things spun too quickly for the memory to make sense of, but Alice and Bella were soon rushing to Volterra Italy to try and save me. Chants started up in Bella's mind that she _had_ to save me. That if I died, she really did lose all reason to live. I couldn't help the physical shudder as I caught her thought of being happy if the Volturi killed her...if she failed to save me....

...A flash, and we were standing in the woods. I was telling her that I never loved her, and that we didn't want her. Her reaction on the outside was what I remembered, but the numbness inside of her shocked me. Then the pain as she blindly tried to follow me into the woods, only to collapse on the ground and lay there unable to want to move...

**End Flashback**

Pulling Bella's hands away from my face, I noticed the dry sobbing. She shook her head and pulled my hands away. "I'm sorry." She made to get up off me, her entire body shaking violently, but I let go of her hands to hold her to me. I pulled her down and held her tightly as she sobbed loudly into my chest. "I didn't mean... It's always like that. I can't stop the memories."

I blinked as my own eyes pricked with non-existent tears. "I never knew... This is what you felt. I thought we were protecting you by leaving, but... I destroyed you."

She shook her head again. "No. You're here with me now, that's what matters."

"Why didn't you tell me this before?" I suddenly demanded, rolling us over so I was on top of her. I grabbed her chin and made her look up at me. "Bella, why didn't you tell me?!" I wasn't angry, but her memories had shaken me.

She sniffled a little, a human reaction still, and tried to look away. I wouldn't let her. "I didn't want to hurt you."

I blinked. _Didn't want to...hurt me..._

"I'm sorry, it got out of control."

"You were trying to protect me." I sighed and leaned down, kissing her passionately. I knew the past was a sore spot that was going to haunt us both for a while, but I fully intended to do everything in my ability to make her happy an help her forget it. "My little shield." How had I been lucky enough to find and win her? I kissed her again, and again, refusing to stop until her sobs had stopped and she was kissing me back.

It wasn't over yet, not by far, but we'd deal with it when it was time.

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Hope you like it.

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	13. Soul

**JuseaPeterson** - Well, I was thinking about how our minds work. I know that when I get lost in thought, my mind can run over too much, accidentally, so I was trying to do the same for Bella. Sure, she's a vampire, but she's focusing on keeping her shield down, trying to pick out which memories to show him, so I could see her accidentally showing him too much.

I try to switch back and forth, with Edward's POV and Bella's POV, so that we can get a look at both of their minds for different situations. I couldn't get over how Edward was like 'It's the vampire, Bella' when she called him beautiful. I was like, 'Um, no it's not! It's you!'. You know? LOL. That's what I was trying to show from Bella's perspective, what she saw.

**TriGemini** - Oh definitely, I think Renesmee was the perfect child to bring in to the Cullen family. Talented, loving family who seems to defy so many odds, and a beautiful little girl, who, as you said, is unique in her own right. That's the key. Edward never realized just _how much_ Bella loved him, until he could see through her eyes. I'm glad you enjoyed it, here's the one I was saying you inspired. I hope you enjoy it.

**Legend** :

"Speaking"

_Thoughts_

**(Scene/POV Changes)**

_**Notes, Messages**_

**Book** : Not certain, I think it's Twilight/New Moon? Roughly when Carlisle spoke about souls and Edward's take, with his doubt about all that.

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**(Bella's POV)**

_"Bella, I'm a vampire. I don't have a soul."_

Frowning, I once again found myself staring at Edward as he worked on a Biology project, a table over. We were in the library, doing research, and he was sitting alone. Me, I was sitting with Angela, Jessica, Mike and Eric. I was supposed to be working on my own project, but all I could think about was how unbearably beautiful Edward was, and how I just _couldn't_ believe his words, on not having a soul.

_"I'm damned. I know I'll be going to hell when I finally die."_

His face was turned down to the paper he wrote on. Text books sat open next to him, but as I'd been carefully watching, I noticed he idly flipped pages at seemingly random times, never even looking at the books. His gorgeous bronze locks were in an even more unruly mess, even as he ran his hand through them and left it there, holding up his head.

_"I won't condemn you to this existence."_

The corners of his ruby lips seemed to turn down, even as his eyebrows followed suit. Then his lips seemed to twitch and turn up. The hand he was leaning on, pulled away and waved directly at me, without his even looking up.

"Bella?"

Jumping in surprise, I spun away from Edward's smirking, downturned face and blinked at Angela. "Huh? Oh, yeah?" I felt warmth explode through my face when I realized I'd been caught staring.

She looked at me in concern. "What's wrong? You looked... I dunno, troubled?"

"Oh, I was just thinking."

"More like staring." Jessica giggled. "I'm surprised you didn't start drooling."

Rolling my eyes, I turned to her even as my face began to heat up in another one of my usual blushes. "Seriously, I _was_ thinking." With a sigh, I bit my lip and focused on my own work. Looking at the page I'd been writing on, I frowned when I realized I'd written 'What is a Soul?' on it.

"What is a soul?" I repeated out loud.

"It's this energy thing inside you?" Mike was smirking a little.

Looking up, I kept my face neutral, not finding that funny and hoping my expression showed it. "No, seriously. What's a soul? I mean, everyone thinks it's this big thing that will get you into heaven, which I'm not arguing. But so many people believe that one sin and you've 'sold your soul'." Shaking my head, I frowned again, realizing I was treading dangerous territory. I also realized I probably wasn't making much sense.

Angela smiled at me, but her next words really surprised me. "It's kindness, Bella. The soul is the part of a person that allows them to know and show compassion and kindness."

Jessica shrugged. "It's love. Without a soul, you can't _love_ a person. Well..." She trailed off, and I knew what she was thinking before she even spoke it. "There are lots of kinds of love, and not all are real or good. But true love, where you'd die for the other person and give anything to keep them safe... That comes from a soul."

"It's generosity and helping others. It's also knowing what the right thing to do is, and doing it." Mike added, finally taking this seriously. "Whether it's easy to or not."

I found myself writing what they said as they went. _Edward was turned into a vampire...but against his will. It wasn't his choice. Sure, he's made mistakes, but everyone has. It doesn't mean he hasn't got a soul._

"You, Bella, have a soul. You're really kind." Angela was still smiling. "A soul isn't something you can get rid of so easily. Why the curiosity?"

I realized I had amazing friends. They didn't ask a boat load of questions, but humored me with a sense of seriousness, even while still being seventeen-year-old kids at heart. Their depth got me thinking more on the subject.

_Edward and his entire family are kind and generous. They protect innocent people, and even turned 'vegetarian' in order to keep from hurting innocents._ "Having a soul is taking the hard way, knowing it'll protect innocent people and those you love, rather than the easy way just because it's convenient." _It's drinking animal blood, despite it being less satisfying and delicious, just to save innocent human beings._ I slanted a glance over to Edward's table, and noticed his brow was furrowed in concentration. He'd stopped writing, and his lips were pulled down in a frown.

He was clearly listening in.

"Very true. It's doing the right thing, no matter how hard it is to do so." Angela agreed.

Jessica and Mike got up as the bell went. They each had another class to go to, but seeing as how Coach Clapp got sick, and the school was having a hard time finding a replacement, I ended up with a spare. Bidding a quick farewell, they took off.

"But again, what brought on this deep choice for a conversation?" Angela, too, had stopped writing.

"I know someone..." I tried to think carefully. In order to be believed, I'd have to stick as close to the truth as possible, but still remain vague and couldn't let her know who I was talking about. "They were stuck in many situations that were beyond their control, but they felt that the outcome is that they have no soul anymore. They constantly do good things and protect people, and they're very kind..."

Shaking my head, I shot a glare at my papers. "It's _so_ obvious to me that they have a soul, but they adamantly refuse to believe me. I wish... I really wish they'd see themselves more clearly. I hate that they're torturing themselves for no reason." My fingers ran idly over the half cresent scar on my wrist, where James had bitten me a short while ago.

With a nod, Angela got up. She also had a free period this period, but was going to use it to get home earlier and get to making dinner for her family. "Well I hope you stick by them, then. I'm sure that you can convince them of what you see." She smiled kindly. "Maybe, with your help, they'll see themselves more clearly?"

I had to shake my head, again. "I _wish_! He _never_ listens to me." Closing my eyes, I bit my lip and bit back a groan when I realized I'd let more slip by referring to Edward as 'he' instead of them. With a sigh, I rubbed my hand over my forehead and offered Angela a shaky smile. "I honestly wish he'd see he isn't as hopeless as he insists on thinking he is." That last part was directed more at Edward.

She nodded again and smiled. "Well, with you in his corner, how can he lose?" Grabbing her things, she, too, bid farewell before heading off.

Turning back to my work, I looked at the short paragraph I'd scribbled on a blank sheet. Feeling inspired, I began to write more.

_**A soul is saving someone from an evil being who was bent on torturing and killing them. A soul is risking your secrets and identity to save another person. It's being vegetarian, even when that's the more difficult thing to do. It's showing control and restraint against all odds. It's your entire family risking their existences for my sake.**_

I tapped my pen on the paper and smiled as I wrote.

_**It's you, Edward. It's your whole family. You 'do' have a soul, and nothing you can say or do will ever change my mind.**_

I carefully tore the sheet out of my notebook and folded it into a small square. Then I looked over and noticed Edward frowning at his books. Looking to my own, I knew there was no chance I'd be able to return my focus to my work, this period. I was too lost in everything I'd heard and realized. I began to pack my books up.

When I grabbed my backpack and note, I got up and walked over to Edward's table. He looked up as I got closer, and I could see so many emotions warring across his light honey eyes. His jaw was tight, but his eyes were warm and he nodded a little as I stepped up beside him. I leaned down and placed the note in front of him before leaning in and kissing his cheek.

"You couldn't have been more wrong." I murmured lightly as he turned to me. I smiled at him. "I know you heard everything, and I want you to know that Carlisle is right." I tapped the note.

When he didn't respond, I leaned in again, carefully brushing my lips against his own. I heard his breath catch in his throat, even as his body stiffened up, but he didn't pull away. With the second brush of my lips over his, I felt him respond, and my lips molded against his own icy, hard ones. Almost immediately, all I wanted to do was crawl into his arms, and I knew I had to pull away before I lost control.

It was harder said than done, but I managed. As I opened my eyes, I saw his much darker ochre ones staring at me intently and felt my face heating up. I stood up straight and took a deep breath to try and calm my frantic heart as I took a step back.

"I'm going to head home. I can't really think about my work right now, so I figure I'll do it later. I'm gonna take a page out of Angela's book, and get dinner started early." With a shrug, I smiled and waved at him.

Edward didn't respond. He sat there staring at me, and I realized his eyes looked slightly dazed. Giggling a little, I snapped my fingers in front of his eyes and watched as he blinked and shook his head a little.

"Would it be presumptuous of me to come by to work on our project, later?" A beautfiul, happy smile came over his face, and it made him look younger than the seventeen physical years he embodied.

"I would be delighted if you did." I stated back, waving again before turning and walking off.

**(That Evening)**

Dinner was surprisingly easy. I hadn't wanted to put too much effort into it, despite my earlier words, so I just made spagetti. I took a little extra time with heating up some garlic bread and making a salad, but all in all it was pretty effortless.

Edward had come by, as he asked to do, and we worked together on the project. Charlie made sure I kept the door open, and made a point to check on us often, which we both found highly annoying. Edward being Edward, though, pointed out it was Charlie's duty as overprotective father to do as much. I was just glad Edward seemed happier. He seemed more carefree, and had this almost constant smile on his face as we worked.

Nothing more was said about the conversation during class, but I did notice when Edward went out to his car to get something, that if left his wallet behind.

Oh, who was he kidding?

Vampire, remember? I knew he didn't _forget_ it. He left it behind on purpose, and seeing a piece of lined paper sticking out of it a little, I opened it. Don't get me wrong, the 'accidentally' leaving it behind, and the _careless_ and _messy_ habit of leaving the paper half out? I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt, that was Edward's subtle way of wanting me to look at something.

Seeing a folded piece of paper, I pulled it out. Imagine my surprise to notice it was my note from earlier. I found myself smiling at Edward as he came back in. He didn't even feign surprise or an indignant air. He simply smiled and gave me a chaste kiss. Then, _his_ next words surprised me.

"A soul, Bella... It's love." His expression was warm and happy. "It's a heart and happiness. To me, my love, my soul..." He leaned in and kissed me deeply. "It's you."

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Ok, so I kind of know Edward is more angsty, but I could so see this conversation and wanted it to be happier. You can place this as before New Moon or just after, when he comes back (I'd say before, since it had Mike and Jessica as Bella's friends still), but it definitely takes place after James' attack.

This one was very difficult to do, as there were many branches I could have gone off on, and many rants I wanted to make. I had to rewrite several parts, really. There were so many ways to do this one. It was inspired by a review left by **TriGemini**.

Hope you like it.

R+R please.

Thank you.

Tenshi


	14. Control

**JuseaPeterson** - Well, I knew the ending was out of character, for where it was in the book. That's why I mentioned in a note at the bottom, that it was just my take on what _could_ have happened, in a different sitting. It's just my opinion, really. I like angsty Edward, but I wanted to go for more of a happy ending. Well, I don't think Edward was completely in character, because it was still set early in their relationship, and Edward is darker in his thoughts on himself. His happy, accepting attitude in the end was OOC, a little, as it came too soon, if you get what I mean?

But otherwise, I love keeping them in character.

LOL, now I'm bouncing between trying once again for the sequel to 'Dragon Figurines' (a PRNS fic), Supernatural fics (Team Cas! Yay!), and Twilight fics (Team Edward! Whooo!).

**TriGemini** - Exactly. When I first found myself reading Twilight and New Moon, I questioned if Edward had a soul, because he was a vampire and all that, but I was leaning strongly towards 'Yes'. As I read, I quickly believed he does, and nothing can ever change my mind. He's made mistakes in the past, but everyone does. He loves Bella, now, and loves and protects his family any way he can.

Well, I think the ending would have fit better, if there had been more of a story between the beginning and the end. I mean, it only _just_ happened, and I found it was slightly out of character for Edward to believe it so fast, but I do believe that if Bella was to stay with him, he'd have to see the light eventually.

This one is a little....ramble-icious? LOL. I don't even know what to think of it. Three more chapters to go after this one (unless I can think up other topics to write about, but I need the muse)

**Warning** : Dark and slightly...uh...insane (?) content.

**Book** - Twlight

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**(Edward's POV)**

When I led Bella to the meadow, I wasn't sure what to expect. She'd told me she knew what I was and if I'd had a heart, that surely would have stopped it. Instead of being frightened like I'd expected, she was surprisingly calm.

I didn't like that.

_She doesn't know what kind of danger she's in!_ I thought as I glared at her. _I could kill her without a second thought! I _want_ to! God, I want to!_ My eyes flashed to her throat, but she didn't even blink. The look was so quick, I doubted she even noticed. _It would be so easy..._ My mind began running over so many ways to kill her. First, it was all ways to do it without spilling her blood, so I wouldn't have to face the surely impossible task of not feeding on her. I could have snapped her neck, strangled her, broke her back... _No..._ I shook my head.

Racing forward, I grabbed her arm and began dragging her through the forest. _There's too many ways._ My mind then began to flash over so many ways to kill her, both fast and painless to slow and painful, all of which involved me feeding off her at some point, as my hunger began to stir. _Stop it!_ I wouldn't give in. No, I would fight it. Both because I couldn't bear to hurt her, and because I couldn't bear to destroy everything Carlisle worked so hard to build for us.

"Where are we going?" Bella seemed uncertain, but not afraid.

_I have to scare her. I have to make her afraid._ She wasn't afraid of our eating habits, though. Maybe if I took her somewhere where we'd be alone and just let my nature out... If I told her how badly I wanted to kill her, to drain her dry... "Up the mountain, through the cloud cover. You need to see me in the sun, _now_!" That was surely to do it. She must have been able to ignore my nature because here, we looked like we fit in, even though we clearly didn't.

She'd never seen us feed, and if it was safe enough, I'd have shown her, but it wasn't. The sunlight seemed like a safe idea.

_Why must she always be so close? Nothing frightens her!_ My breathing sped up as I quickly turned and tossed her onto my back. My throat burned from the thirst as her scent hit me. She was too close, but I pushed it all away as I began to run up the mountain, ignoring her gasp of fright at the speed. _Oh, right. I'm a _vampire_ and she's afraid of my _running_._ I jumped over a log and ducked under several low branches. I kept thinking I had to make her understand.

I _want_ to kill her!

But I _can't_!

Two sides of me warred about this. My vampiric nature begged for the taste of her blood; to feel the hot sweet liquid ooze down my throat and satiate the burning hunger. It screamed she was a threat to my coven, to my family. My long buried human side was coming back with a vengence, arguing that it was wrong and cold. Something about her drew me.

Was it the fact I couldn't read her mind, like I could everyone else? No, but it played a big part. She was fascinating. The more time I spent around her, the harder it was to leave her behind. Obviously, my hunger didn't scare her; my nature meant nothing more than a technicality to her. She wasn't afraid. So maybe, if she saw something she couldn't explain... If she saw something she couldn't pass off as human in any way... Maybe then she'd be afraid.

"Edward?" Her voice was so tiny and shaky.

Glancing over my shoulder, I saw her eyes were wide with terror and excitement. "What?" The tone wasn't as harsh as I was going for. Staring into her eyes, I couldn't help but feel myself thaw toward her.

"Watch where you're going!" She shrieked, ducking her head into my shoulder.

I spun and dodged easily around a tree, ducking under the branches. "Running is second nature to me, I won't crash!" I called slightly as I tried to bite back my grin. I saw beams of light beginning to penetrate the trees and every time I ran through one, my hands and my face lit up. Her face was still buried in my shoulder, her breath hot against my throat, so she wouldn't see it. _Almost there._ Part of me felt horrible. What if I _did_ succeed in scaring her off? I didn't want to lose her, even if it was safer for everyone if she left.

We finally reached the point I was looking for and I carefully lowered Bella to the ground. I watched a moment, amused, as she stumbled and stood shakily. Then my amusement faded as I turned and walked towards the sunlight. "This is why we can never go out in the sun with people around." I stated as my hands made quick work of the buttons of my shirt.

For a split second, my human side's modesty overwhelmed me, even as I pulled the last button through the hole. I pushed it aside, however, as I stepped into the light and turned to face Bella. _Do you see?_ I knew my expression was anxious, even as her eyes widened and raked over my naked chest._ Do you see what I meant??_

I expected fear and horror. I expected her to scream, or cry, or look utterly disgusted. I _didn't_ expect the awed look that came into her eyes. I _didn't_ expect the way her jaw dropped ever so slightly and her eyes filled with tears. I didn't know whether or not to expect the deep cherry blush that stained her cheeks, even as she took a step closer, clearly mesmerized.

"It's like thousands of diamonds are embedded under the surface." The words were a whisper. An unconscious vocalisation of her thoughts; not meant for me to hear.

But I did.

Her eyes slowly worked their way up from the waist of my pants, raking over every inch of exposed flesh. It was...unnerving. If I'd had the ability to blush, I probably would have. Her eyes looked so deep and brown, and they danced back and forth as if struggling to take in every possible millimeter. "You're beautiful."

I laughed harshly and spun. Stepping down and out of the light, I moved away from her, even as my fingers quickly ran over the buttons, redoing them. "It's the vampire. It's the skin of a killer, Bella. _I'm _a killer." I was mentally screaming at her to understand, even as I kept my back to her. Yet, I was aware of her following me, hearing her clumbsy steps as she struggled to keep up.

"It doesn't matter." I heard her slip and fall.

Turning, I watched as she got up. "I've killed before." I told her, watching as she took that in and shook her head.

"I don't care." And she really didn't, I could see that in her eyes.

For a moment, I felt a strange fluttering in my chest, and it hit me...she didn't care I was a monster. She didn't care I'd killed before, that I wanted to kill every day of my existence. I thought of something that I was so positive would change her mind. My throat tightened, even as I walked closer. "I want...to kill you." I hated myself in that instant, for saying those words aloud, but I _had_ to make her understand!

Her face contorted a little for a moment as she processed that. Uncertainty flitted across her face, but it cleared in less than a second and she stepped up close to me, causing me to take a quick backstep to keep a little distance.

Her words were echoing through my mind, even as I tried to process what was going on. I tried to process that I just told her I wanted to _kill_ her, and she was standing there, big as she pleased, as if I'd just told her it was a nice day out. _Where's her fear?! _"I've never wanted a human's blood so much." I tried to explain, letting my thoughts spill out over my tongue._ Why isn't she terrified of me?? Why doesn't she hate me?!_

She shook her head and took another step closer, making me take another step back. "I'm not afraid of you."

That did it. I felt myself snap. "You _should_ be!" I yelled. I used my speed and disappeared from her sight to race around in the trees and land on a nearby boulder, watching as her eyes seemed to dart to me in an unusually slow manner, though I knew it would be quick to any other human. "As if you could run away!" I jumped down and flashed around in the trees, knowing her eyes wouldn't be able to keep up. I came to a stop less than five feet in front of her, glaring at her even as she gasped.

Her heart was pounding and her breathing was unsteady. Her face was ashen and she stared at me with wide innocent eyes.

"As if you could fight me off!" I continued, taking a sick thrill in being this free around her. I snapped a root off a nearby boulder with ease, using only one hand. Staring at her for a split second, I turned and tossed the root at another boulder and watched as it smashed part of the boulder to pieces, and how the dirt and bits of root went flying from the force. "As if you'd stand a chance." I whispered as I disappeared from her sight again, running around until I came up behind her. The vampire in me screamed now was my chance, but somehow, the human was still there, fighting for control; he was there, fighting to save Bella.

She spun to me, her steps clearly unsteady, and took a step back. She looked afraid, finally. No, she looked terrified. _Good. I finally got my point across._ I felt my body humming from tension and took a step closer. _No!_ I stopped short and took a deep breath. _Fight it! Don't drink..._ I watched her a moment and something hit me. _She's not breathing._ We didn't need to breathe, but humans did. She did.

I'd scared her so badly, she wasn't even aware she was holding her breath, but her face was turning whiter than was healthy and her heart was hammering faster and faster. I felt the tension draining and held my hands up a little in a sign of peace. "Bella." I kept my voice low and soft. "Please, breathe. I promise you're safe." I took a couple steps towards her, keeping them slow.

She stared at me with a look that was uncomprehending, and still didn't breath. Her _eyes_! They were so wide and innocent, I felt for a moment like I was staring into that of a deer. She was so beautiful, despite her terror of me. I could see her trembling, and fought the urge to walk over and envelope her in my arms.

My throat began to burn as her intoxicating scent began to wash over me, but I pushed it to the back of my mind. The first and foremost thing on my mind was keeping her safe. "Bella. Breathe." I very carefully reached out, placing my arms against the boulder at her back, and pinning her to the rock. "Breathe. I swear to you, I'm not thirsty right now." I tried for a chuckle, even as the burning in my throat told me otherwise.

That seemed to work. She let out a breathy laugh and leaned against the rock. Her face slowly regained it's slightly flushed look, even as her chest heaved with the air she was gasping into her lungs.

Her breath ghosted sweetly across my face and I closed my eyes for a quick moment. "I'm so very sorry." I told her softly, reopening my eyes and watching as the fear faded from her eyes. _I wanted to make her afraid, but when it finally worked, I overdid it._ Then I marvelled at something. _I lost control._ I blinked at her a moment and took in her confused but no longer afraid look. _Sort of._ _I lost control, and she didn't run screaming. She almost passed out from not breathing, but she didn't run away._ And I hadn't hurt her. "Tell me what you're thinking." I whispered, feeling my frustration flare up when her mind remained blank.

She winced, flushed and looked away. "_Now_ I'm scared." She muttered.

_Well, it seems I got what I wanted._ I felt my chest tighten and the pain blossomed unexpectedly, but I moved away, taking a couple slow steps back._ She's finally scared, so she'll be safe now. This is what I wanted.......isn't it?_ I didn't know what my face showed, but she looked at me and her eyes widened. She quickly took a step forward, keeping a safe distance.

"No, Edward, I'm not afraid of _you_." She spoke quickly, trying to get me to understand, no doubt. "I'm only afraid of losing you." There was nothing but raw sincerity in her eyes.

I blinked a moment and sighed. She took another step closer, bringing her within inches of my face, but I couldn't bring myself to take another step back. _Ah, this is wrong. I'm not only making myself miserable, but her, too. What am I doing?_ I looked at her, and I couldn't really deny it anymore. Part of me didn't want to. This was so much more than me trying to protect her from my want to feed on her, the threat I posed. It suddenly hit me as I gazed into her brown eyes... "And so the lion fell in love with the lamb." _I've been trying to protect her because I can't stand the thought of anything happening to her... Because...I love her._

"What a stupid lamb." She cracked a small smile.

I stepped up into her personal space and stared into her eyes. "What a sick, masochistic lion." I shot back with a raised eyebrow, my lips twitching into one of my half smirks.

It was funny, really. I had to control my hunger and strength around her, but having her know all this... Having her know my secret, it was so very releasing. I felt lighter, more carefree for the first time in a long time. There was still a little voice in the back of my head that screamed at me that I didn't deserve her, and how wrong all this was and I had no doubt about that, but at the same time, having her here, I actually felt _normal_.

Not human, no. I was all too aware of the lack of heartbeat from myself, and my heightened senses around her, but standing there with her, I felt a little less like a monster. It was quite...liberating.

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Ok, so totally random. This _started_ out as going on about how he sparkles in the sun, but working from his POV changed it a lot, so I went for his control around her. Hm, I hope it turned out alright.

Hope you like it.

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	15. So Much For Hunting

**Bellaklutz2010** - Thank you, I'm glad you enjoy it. :)

**JuseaPeterson** - It's not really a choice. I'm kind of working on all three. I'm thinking up my next chapters for the PRNS one, I'm writing non-stop on a Twilight/Silent Hill crossover (which I'm debating on posting the first chapter to, as it's going pretty good), and I'm thinking up my next chapters on the Supernatural one. It all depends on my mood when I sit down and write.

Yeah, that was part of my problem. I was trying to cross both the book and the movie. It's just...there are thoughts I loved in the book that weren't in the movie, and vice versa, so I tried to combine them. It might not have worked. LOL I actually thought it was too detailed, which I thought was a problem. I'm glad if you enjoyed it anyways. :)

**Link's Ocarina Babe** - Thank you. I do enjoy reading things from Edward's POV. I don't have access to Midnight Sun, so I'm just trying to keep in Edward's head as much as possible.

**TriGemini** - That's exactly it. From Bella's perspective, and Edward's (to me) it seems that a lot of the journey to their relationship was internal struggles. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)

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**(Edward's POV)**

When I told Bella I was leaving, I saw the blatant disappointment and pain. It was only a hunting trip, and I'd be back, but apparently being apart was as difficult for her as it was for me. _Of course, you already knew that._ My mind unhappily reminded me, shoving images of Bella's face into my mind, from what Jacob had seen through Sam. _Stupid mutts._

He'd taken too much pleasure in my pain. Did he really not see that it was hurting Bella, too? Did he even _care_??

The image of her face, the day I left, was forever burned into my memory, and it took so very little to bring it to the front of my thoughts. I still don't know how Jasper hasn't gone insane from my pain.

**Flashback**

Bella was lying curled up into an impossibly tiny ball on the ground. Her eyes were only tiny slits in her too white face, and they were glazed over. If it weren't for her loud breathing, the painful sobs, and violent trembling, I'd have been certain she was dead.

The idea was enough to make me want to hunt down the Volturi all over again, just for doing that to her.

Her hair was drenched and dripping, almost freezing to her face from the cold wind that was blowing. Her lips were almost white, and her skin was clammy-looking. I recognized the area she was in as being quite a distance from where I'd told her I didn't want her.

The words still made me cringe inside. How could I ever have thought lying like that was right?

She was whimpering, silent tears running down her cheeks to leave red trails from the contrasting icy rain. Bella lay there shivering, even as a werewolf sniffed her face. She didn't flinch, she didn't gasp, it was like she didn't even notice it.

**End Flashback**

_As if I need that image burned into my brain._ I ran through the forest almost blindly, following my younger brother Emmett. _As if I didn't have enough to feel horrible about._ My chest clenched tightly and I slowed to a stop, coming to rest against a tree as that image refused to fade. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to focus on the forest surrounding us. _I don't deserve her. I've never deserved her._

But somehow...she still loved me.

"Bro?" Emmett's voice was low and concerned, even as I felt him approach. "You ok?"

Shaking my head, I became aware my hands were trembling. I opened my eyes, feeling the pain behind them that told me I'd be crying if it were possible for vampires to cry. "No." My voice was raw, and I let out the harsh breath I'd been holding. "I can't help but think of...when we abandoned Bella." I shook my head again. "No, when _I'd_ abandoned her." _I was such a coward._

"You were trying to protect her, Edward." Emmett's voice held a touch of a warning. "And you came back." _You thought you were doing the right thing. You couldn't have-_ He winced as his thoughts ran to Alice. _Ok, so you _could_ have known, but you didn't know. _

"I wouldn't be here if it weren't for her." The tightening in my chest lit up as I recalled how she'd gone through so much to get to me. She even faced off against the Volturi to save my life...or, rather, existence. _All because she loves me._ The idea was still so hard to grasp. I'd put her through so much, and she only loved me more, it seemed. "She saved me, even after I left her."

Emmett stood against another tree with his arms folded over his chest. "She is...strange. I like her." He grinned. "She's funny." _Klutzy, fragile little human._

_You like it best when she falls down._ "Of course you do." I muttered with my own grin, pulling away from the tree. "Come on, I'm hungry." I led the chase through the woods. I don't know how long we'd been running, but we were heading farther up the mountains, looking for some grizzlies for Emmett's taste. It had been a while since I'd last gone hunting with my brother, and though I was constantly anxious about Bella's safety, it _was_ nice to spend time with him.

My throat burned with the hunger, but all my time with Bella had lowered the sensation into an easily tolerable hum. I had to eat; we both did.

All of a sudden, a vibration in my pocket made me growl as I skidded to a stop. I'd been hopping through the trees, and my last bound left me on the top of a giant boulder. I crouched there, feeling the phone vibrate and knowing the news wasn't good.

A corresponding growl made me look down, and Emmett was leaning casually against another tree.

There could only be two people calling, I figured. Bella to tell me off for setting Alice on babysitting duty, or Alice to tell me something had happened to Bella. As I fished my phone out and raised it to my ear, I sincerely hoped it was the former.

It wasn't.

"Alice." I saw her number on the phone and felt my chest tighten up again.

The line was silent for a fraction of a second, but it felt like an eternity to me, and I almost made a mad dash right back to Forks on that alone. Then, I heard her sigh. "Bella's gone. I don't know what happened. One minute she was at her work, the next, her future disappeared." There was a slight growl on the other end of the line. "I _despise_ not being able to see the werewolves!"

I growled back, feeling terror and rage course through me. "Got it." I mumbled, snapping my phone shut. I had to consciously keep my grip loosened or I would have crushed it in my grip. I snarled a little and blinked down at the furrows my nails had dug into the boulder.

"Go."

Looking up, I watched as Emmett's face was torn between disappointment, anger, but most strongly...worry.

"Make sure she's ok." He abruptly grinned. "We have _tons_ of time to go hunting." He shrugged.

With a quick nod, I hopped down, gathered my brother into a tight hug, and took off as fast as my legs would carry me. My destination was my Volvo, which was parked almost ten miles away, and then I had a good half hour drive ahead of me, even if I went as fast as the car would go.

I was growling and snarling the entire time, planning hundreds of ways to kill the werewolves myself, if anything happened to Bella. I even tried to plan out ways to sneak into their territory, beyond the treaty boundaries, just to make sure she was alright.

I heard Emmett's mental sigh.

_So much for hunting._

**(Forks)**

Speeding down the highway in my Volvo, I watched the almost empty streets. I'd been driving back and forth for about an hour or two, since I'd gotten back, having to stop off multiple times to fill the tank with gas. I found myself often driving right up to the boundary line, and my foot resting a simple millimeter away from the gas pedal as I eyed the seemingly harmless road ahead of me.

I wanted to go over that line. Oh, god, I wanted to go over it! Everything I had in me was spent in trying to keep myself sane and rational, even though my mind kept chanting that Bella was over there, and quite possibly in grave danger.

_No. If I do that, I break the treaty and start a war. Carlisle and Esme... They've worked so hard, especially Carlisle. I can't do that to them._ My eyes narrowed as I gripped the steering wheel tightly. _But Bella..._ My foot hit the gas pedal, but I'd already switched gears. _I need to trust her. She begged me to trust her. She's known him so long, maybe she's right._

_No. He's a werewolf. Enough said._ Bella knew him as a human, but as a werewolf, he was entirely different. _She can't possibly know what she's facing._

That didn't serve to reassure me.

I shook my head, even as I peeled out of there and down the road, back the way I came. I pulled over sharply and got out, walking into the woods and pacing impatiently as I waited...for what? What was I waiting for? Bella to call me and tell me she was alright? The stench of her blood to filter to my nose? Alice to call and tell me the werewolves had killed her?

I was so worked up, I hadn't even noticed the flaw in the last thought. If the werewolves had decided to kill her, Alice _wouldn't_ call, because she _wouldn't_ see it. My phone began to vibrate and I actually jumped as it stirred me from my pacing. I grabbed it out of my pocket, saw the ID and answered it quickly. "What have you got?"

Alice sighed, but this time it seemed to be a sigh of relief. "She's alright. She's heading away from the First Beach now." With that, the line went dead.

I snapped my phone shut again, this time a little more gently. My body was filled with relief, even as I raced back to my Volvo and hopped in. I revved the engine and sped out into the highway with the window open. It was seconds before I caught Bella's scent, and I grimaced as I realized how laced with the disgusting stench of werewolf, it was. The fear had faded from me, but now I was beginning to feel the rage.

_She was in danger! Why did she do this?! Can't she see why I forbade her to see him?!_ Did _I_ even see why? I kept telling myself it was because I was worried about her, but catching her scent intermingled with werewolf, I felt jealousy flare up. I stomped the idea back down, insisting it was only her safety I was worried about._ I could so easily have broken the treaty, just to go and get her._ I sniffed cautiously, ignoring he burning hunger that flared up, and let the relief course through me again when I realized there was no blood.

_At least she's safe._ Still, she'd snuck around behind my back. That idea more than anything had hurt, though, I understood why she did what she did. _Why couldn't she have found another way?_ I cursed myself. _Probably because I didn't _give_ her another way._ But she had to understand my fears! She had to understand why I was trying so hard to protect her!! _This _isn't_ going to happen again._

There. I'd finally caught up with her truck. I swerved out on to the road behind her and watched as she happened to glance into the mirror. Her eyes widened and filled with fear, which hurt me. _She's afraid of me_? Something screamed in the back of my mind that she ought to be afraid, even as my hunger roared. I swallowed heavily, watching as she stubbornly refused to let her eyes meet my own. I kept up behind her, watching as she steadily drove straight to Angela's house, a little faster than usual.

_That's fine. We'll talk about this later._ I thought as I drove past. I kept my eyes on the road, but glanced at her out of the corner of my eye. I saw her watching me with pain-filled eyes before she turned, pasted a smile on her face, and walked up to the front door. I turned back on to the main highway and sped home. I'd leave my car there before heading to Bella's on foot to await her return.

**(Bella's Room)**

As I hopped up through the window, I sighed and allowed myself a second to relax. Her scent stirred my hunger, but after so long of fighting it, I had it easily under control. I walked over to her bed and laid down, breathing deeply and allowing the thought to sink in that she was really alright. What had she faced, though? What had Jacob said? Done?

I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply, holding my breath and tasting the scent in the air. It was her scent mixed with my own; very sweet and relaxing. My eyes snapped open.

"She's mine." The voice was low and growled, and if I could have, I probably would have been blushing. The statement had caught me by surprise, but as I let out the breath and relaxed, I found I honestly felt that way. I loved her so much, I couldn't bear the idea of her enjoying spending time with Jacob more than me. _Am I... Is this jealousy?_ I blinked and sat up quickly, feeling my anger rise again, but this time at myself.

_I have no reason to be jealous. She's told me time and time again how much I mean to her. I know she loves me._ Still, a small voice in the back of my head argued that if she loved me, why'd she go to see Jacob? _Because he's her best friend._ Why'd she sneak out? _Because I forbade it._

I heard her truck pull up and pulled myself over to the window. My anger was back, but more so at myself for not trusting in her, and her for scaring me so badly. I leaned against the wall and glared at her door, trying to pull together what I was going to say when she came into the house. I didn't want to be mad, but I was _so_ worried, and my hunger was making it hard _not_ to be a little crabby at her.

She greeted her father and puttered away around the house. I could hear her heart pounding from my position against the wall, and her breathing was slightly elevated. She undoubtedly knew I was there, and she was stalling for time. Her heartrate and breathing kept elevating, like she was struggling to keep control.

_She's...afraid?_

I swallowed heavily and took a moment to gather my control. Then I heard her footsteps come up the stairs, hesitate outside the door... Her heart sped up and I heard her hesitantly turn the knob. She didn't look at me as she entered the room and closed the door behind her. She took a moment, trying to keep her breathing controlled. Then she turned around.

"Hi?" It came out such a hesitant whisper.

I didn't move, even as an almost unbearable urge to walk over and envelope her into a tight hug coursed through me. Instead, I kept glaring at her, deciding it was probably safer to let her do the talking... At least, for now. The werewolf reek was enough to offset my anger, once again.

"Err...So...I'm alive." She gestured to her body, which seemed to have not a mark on it.

The smell of the werewolf on her grew more pronounced as she moved, and I couldn't help the growl that escaped my throat, even as I remained frozen against the wall. I wasn't growling at her. I was growling at the filthy werewolf that _dared_ to lay his hands on her. The disgusting _dog_ that dared to leave _his_ scent on _my _Bella.

Bella winced and looked away, and I felt myself thaw the tiniest bit. I didn't want to scare or hurt her, I just wanted her to know... "No harm done?" She asked even more hesitantly, her eyes locked on the ground.

That did it. I sighed and closed my eyes, pinching the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger. "Bella..." I felt her gaze on my face. "Do you have _any_ idea how close I was to crossing the line, today?" I wasn't trying to threaten her, I was trying to let her know how worried I'd been. She gasped sharply, and I looked at her, letting my hand fall to my side. "Do you have any idea what that would have meant?"

Her eyes were wide. "You can't!" Her voice echoed through her room and she froze. She half turned to the door with her hand over her mouth.

I listened carefully, but Charlie was watching a game. His thoughts were focused solely on the players, and I knew he hadn't heard her. Turning back to her, I watched as she seemed to struggle over something.

"Edward, they'd use any excuse for a fight. They'd love that. You can't ever break the rules!" She hissed lower.

"Maybe they aren't the only ones who'd enjoy a fight." I muttered, giving her a look.

Her eyes hardened and she glared at me. "Don't you start! You made the treaty, you stick to it!"

I had to swallow as she finally walked over and wrapped her arms around me. I remained standing the way I was, noticing easily as her body stiffened a little. I couldn't wrap my arms around her just yet, I was fighting the hunger, as well as the urge to back away because of the reek of werewolf on her.

"You weren't supposed to know about it." She seemed to flinch. "You were supposed to be hunting." I wrapped my hands around her waist and she looked up then, and her beautiful brown eyes seemed to narrow as she scanned my face. Her hand came up and traced the hollows under my eyes, which easily gave away my hunger.

I barely resisted the urge to shiver as a chill ran through my body at the warm, gentle caress of her fingers under my eyes. "When Alice told me your future disappeared, I came back." I stated simply, wondering briefly if Emmett had managed to catch any grizzlies on his own.

Bella's frown deepened. "You shouldn't have done that, now you'll just have to go away again."

_Not right now. _"I can wait." I muttered, tightening my hold on her a little. Looking down at her, I silently sighed as this seemed to start a whole new round of arguments. She tried to insist she was safe with Jacob but after today, I wasn't about to take things so lightly.

I began to plan ways to keep her safe, and always surrounded by one of us. I knew Alice would be more than eager to help...if there was a little something in it for her. If I remembered correctly, there was a certain canary yellow Porsche she'd had her eyes on. I felt horrible for planning things behind Bella's back, but I couldn't handle the thought of her around that mangy mutt.

I made a mental note to call Alice that night... No, wait, she'd already have seen that, so I made a mental note to expect her call sometime tonight, with her response. For now, I decided I'd relax and enjoy my time with Bella, even if I was starving.

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Hope you like it

The thoughts might be confusing, but I'm trying to cover all the things I can see Edward feeling and thinking (and I know I missed a lot), and there's just SO many things he could be thinking/feeling.

R+R please

Thank you

Tenshi


	16. Decision

**Warnings** : Very minor swearing and Bella blowing up (not literally).

**Note** : This is the LAST chapter. I thought I had more, but... O.o Thank you all for sticking with this. As with my other One-shot series', I'm going to switch this to complete, but if I think of any more chapter ideas, I will update it.

**Bellaklutz2010** - I'm glad you like it. :)

**Link/s Ocarina Babe** - Thank you! :) I love the challenge of trying to get into characters' heads and determine how they might think/act given certain situations. :)

**TriGemini** - Hmmm I don't know. I recall when Angela suggests Edward might be jealous and when Bella mentions it to him, he didn't really deny it. I think that if he can admit he's selfish and has a bad temper, he can admit to being jealous. Maybe not right away... But after some point. I just wanted to show what might have happened while they were hunting, and when Edward realizes that Bella disappeared.

**JuseaPeterson** - I tried to show that while he was angry, it was more with himself and the wolves than Bella. To be real, sure, there'd be a hint of anger at her, but not a lot. Not really. I love how the book is from Bella's POV, but considering my computer can't work with PDF files to read Midnight Sun, I'm working from imagination of what it might be like from Edward's POV. I like the challenge.

Yeah, I wanted to put a hint of brotherly bonding in there. You see a lot of fics focus on Alice and Jasper as a secondary pairing to Edward/Bella, so I wanted to add a little Emmet in there. Rosalie is hardest to work with, which is why I haven't really tried to work on her at all.

Thank you all for sticking with me. I apologize for not giving notice earlier, but I thought I had at least three chapters left. Checking them, I realized I'd posted them all but one. O.o This (so far) is my last update. I'm really glad you all enjoyed it. :)

**Book** : Based very loosely on the happenings of Eclipse. It could be set during the book or after.

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**(Normal POV)**

It was always Jacob this and Jacob that. It was wearing on Bella's nerves, even as others saw it as her shining light in a vast sea of darkness. Everyone thought he was the one for her. Jacob, himself; Charlie; even her friends at school. All but Angela that is. It seemed Angela was the only one who could understand just how much Edward Cullen meant to Bella.

"What about Jacob? He's a nice boy." Her father was trying to press her into spending more time with him, a vain hope shining in his eyes that she'd turn away from Edward Cullen. "He's your best friend, isn't he?"

"Yeah dad, that's just it. He's a _friend_." Bella glared at her father. _As in, I don't love him like that. Stop prying already._

"But Edward left you. He hurt you. Jacob would never do that." Her father insisted.

_But he did. He left when he changed. He plunged my world back into darkness._ Bella shook her head, feeling angry tears welling up in her eyes. "Would you both just _stop_ it, already!" She finally yelled, stomping her foot on the ground, even as she gasped for air, to keep the tears at bay. She watched her father's eyes widen in shock, but it did nothing to diminish the pain and frustration she felt. "Jacob this, Jacob that. If you love him so much, why don't you marry him!" She'd been dealing with this for so long, she couldn't just let it roll off her back this time.

It didn't help Jacob had said he'd rather see her dead than with the man who made her happiest. It hurt her so deeply to hear that from her best friend. It helped Edward was there for her, but all this pushing had finally made her snap.

They always compared Jacob to Edward. The Cullens saw Jacob as a mutt, but at times even Edward thought she'd be happier with the 'mutt'. Jacob saw the Cullens as 'leeches' and 'bloodsuckers', she wasn't sure when the 'mosquito' comments would come out. It could be so annoying being stuck in the middle of the testosterone-filled vampire-werewolf bitch-fest.

At least, that's what she'd taken to calling it.

The Cullens were freaks. Jacob was too dangerous. No one knew what was really going on. Was Angela Weber her only human friend?

_No, knowing my luck, she really _is_ a witch, or something._ Bella thought darkly as she took a deep breath and struggled to get control.

"Bella-"

"No! I'm so sick of you and Jacob trying to make me chose! Both of you, this is ridiculous and childish!" She shook her head, angrily brushing her hair behind her ear, even as stray tears made their way down her cheeks. _So much for control._ "I love Edward! What else do I have to say? Did he hurt me? Yes. Did he leave? Yes."

"Exactly! He hurt you!" Dad was on his feet, glaring at her with the importance of his words. "What's to say he won't do it again?!"

"He promised, and he's a man of his word." She stated quietly.

"He also promised he'd never let anything happen to you, and you nearly got killed in Phoenix!"

Bella winced. "If you'll remember, that was _my_ fault. I broke up with him, and left him behind. Did you want him to pull a stalker and stay in my shadow every step of my life?" Her eyes narrowed and she wiped at the tears on her face. "Both of you; you and Jacob... Did you know, Jacob told me he'd rather see me dead than with Edward??" _Ok, so it was more like 'I'd rather see you dead than a vampire', but Charlie doesn't need to know that last part._

Charlie's eyes widened in horror. He seemed to search her face a moment. "He didn't mean it."

_Oh, yes he did._ "Yeah, dad, he meant it. I saw it in his face. That was _before_ he decided to stick his tongue down my throat against my will, too." Bella paused a moment as Edward's warning about werewolves came to mind again.

_Werewolves are unstable. The people near them get hurt._

_Not necessarily physically, either._ She thought darkly, even as she winced and rubbed at her hand, which had finally healed from the break. She'd been scared and angry when Jacob had kissed her so forcefully. Behind all that, she found herself thinking of her life with Edward and her life with Jacob.

In all honesty, Jacob made her happy. He was the brother she never had, and if she looked at it too closely, she could almost see a hint of love growing between them. She pushed that thought away, not wanting to dwell on it too much. When Edward had left, Jacob was there for her. Her shining sun in the world of darkness.

Yes, he'd been good for her. She'd been happy again and alive, but... It wasn't the same. She felt so...incomplete.

"I was incomplete." She mumbled out loud. Looking at Charlie, Bella watched as he turned off the game and sat down. "When Edward left, I died inside." They both winced, and for a moment, Bella was certain she'd heard a sound upstairs, of something falling to the floor. "I became nothing but a shell." She hoped to god Edward wasn't up in her room, listening to this. Glancing to the clock, she felt a little reassured that he wasn't due for another fifteen minutes. "Jacob was there..."

Charlie opened his mouth, but Bella held up her hand as she leaned against the door frame. Her anger was gone, and she felt drained, but there was also a _need_ to get her thoughts into words for her father to understand.

"He was there and I lived again, _but_..." She cut off Charlie before he could speak. "I wasn't _alive._ I was surviving, but not living; happy but incomplete. Maybe, for a little while, I could have been happy with Jacob..." She shook her head. "But it's not the same as what I feel around Edward. I feel complete and alive. Somehow..." Now she grinned. "I feel like I belong."

"Bella..."

"I love Jacob...as a brother. Edward, he's my destiny. He's my eternity and my reason for being. Dad, you have no idea what he's gone through to try and keep me safe." Bella raised an eyebrow. "But accidents happen. He's only human." Her breath caught in a choked off laugh at the last word, and she rubbed at her face, hoping Charlie hadn't caught the laughter.

"He _left_ you, Bella." Charlie's words were weak, and so was his protest.

"Because he was trying to protect me, dad." Bella walked over and sat down next to her father. "Think about it. Think of all the times he's had to save me. He felt he was the threat, the reason I was in so much pain, or constantly getting hurt. He left to try and give me a chance at a better life." She saw Charlie's eyes widen and fill with a hint of understanding. "It hurt us both, so much. He was trying to save me."

"He came back."

"Because being away from me was killing him as much as it was killing me to be away from him." Bella sighed. "You know what? You and Jacob want me to chose." She stood up slowly and walked to the stairs. "I love you dad, but my life is my life. I'm 18 and can make my own decisions. If you're going to make me chose..." She threw a look in his direction as she stood at the base of the stairs. "I'm not going to chose in your favor."

Turning, she began to walk up the stairs. "I'm chosing happiness. I chose my eternity." Her walk was slow and paced as she went to her room. She kept her eyes on the ground as she walked in the door and closed it behind her.

Suddenly, she was engulfed in a freezing and tight, yet gentle hug, and she could feel cool breath against her throat. "Bella..." The voice was full of strain and so much emotion.

Swallowing heavily, Bella raised her hands and wrapped them around Edward's waist. "How long...?" She caught sight of a snow globe lying on the floor on her jacket. It hadn't broken, but it explained the sound she'd heard.

There was a slight chuckle. "I showed up a little early. I entered at the point where you exploded at your father. I didn't mean to listen, I apologize. I just..." He seemed to hesitate. "I couldn't fight the curiosity."

"Curiosity killed the cat, you know." Bella muttered as she tightened her hold on the hard, cold waist of Edward Cullen. "It's a good thing you're not a cat."

He chuckled again, and with a quick movement, swung Bella up into his arms. Carrying her to her bed, he gently set her down with a kiss to her forehead. "They're-No, _we're_ making you chose." He stated, rather than asking, as he lay next to her on her bed. "Between Jacob and myself. I'm sorry, Bella."

"Don't be. It's an easy decision." _And you're not the one making me chose, they are._ She snuggled into his chest and breathed his scent in deeply. "I chose you."

"Bella, I'm not good for you." His words were a weak whisper, and he didn't even try to push her away. In the past, his arguments were so strong, but now they were so weat. Still, the words had a ver unexpected reaction on Bella.

"Don't!" The tears welled up in her eyes as her body stiffened, and she turned her hands into fists in his shirt, clenching the material as tightly as she could. "Don't ever say those words again!" The tone was harsh and shaky, but it brought to mind the day he'd said goodbye. "I don't want to..." She trailed off and bit her lip, hard. _I don't wanna remember! Please, it still hurts!_

"Bella?" Edward's tone was soft and confused. "I don't understand." He stroked her back softly, curling into her to show he wasn't going anywhere. He wrapped both arms around her, holding on even as she shivered.

She swallowed heavily and clenched her eyes shut, trying to keep the tears at bay. "It reminds me..." She shuddered. "Of when you told me '_You're_ not good for _me_'." She felt him stiffen up. "When you said goodbye." The last was a choked whisper as a tear escaped her closed eyes. Her heart thudded painfully in her chest as she recalled the agony those words had caused.

"I'll never forgive myself for doing that to you. I never could have imagined...the _pain!_" His words were strained and he tightened his hold on her. "After I did that to you, you _still_ love me? _How_?!"

"I never stopped." Bella rubbed at her eyes, trying to keep the traces of tears at bay. "You are my life now." She smiled a little at remembering his words to her, the day they split up to lead James on a false trail.

Very slowly Edward's body relaxed, and one hand worked it's way up to her hair, even as the other lay across her waist, hugging her to him. "I'll never leave you again, I _swear_." He was silent as he pressed a kiss to Bella's forehead. He very quickly pressed another one a little lower, then he gently tilted her head back to he could have free access to her face. He showered her entire face with cold, gentle kisses, before finally landing on her lips.

He kissed her deeply and slowly, savoring the flavor of her lips upon his own. There was no rush this time, he was going slowly to enjoy the moment as long as he could. Bella's arms came up around his neck, and she felt him grin into the kiss as he clearly recognized the signs of her giving in to her wants. Still, he didn't push her away. He continued to kiss her, deepening the kiss until he felt her body trembling, and her heart was pounding frantically.

Hesitantly, he pulled away and gazed into her face, watching as she panted from the lack of breath. "Bella, you are my everything. I told you once..." He held her left hand and ran his thumb over the ring on her third finger, and he smiled. "I promise to love you forever; every single day of forever. I meant it." He leaned forward and gave her a light kiss. When he pulled back, his eyes were distant and very slowly a grin broke out across his face.

"What?" Bella's eyes narrowed. "Are you listening again?"

He nodded. "It seems you've given your father a lot to think about." His grin spread even wider, showing off his perfect white teeth.

"I'm almost afraid to ask." Bella grinned a little, even as she snuggled into Edward's chest.

"I'll be on your step bright and early to pick you up." He laughed very quietly.

"Pick me up?"

"You'll see." He stated with a wink as he pressed her closer to his body. "For now, get some rest. Alice will be by a little before me, I'm sure. You'll want to be rested up."

Frowning for a moment, Bella pursed her lips. "If this has anything to do with parties or presents..."

"Relax, Bella, please." Another kiss was pressed to her forehead. "Sleep well, my love."

"I love you, Edward." Bella's eyes began to droop as she cuddled into his embrace. Her face was buried in his throat and she sighed with a slight kiss to the exposed, cold skin. Shivering a little, she whined in her throat as he pulled away, but relaxed when he came back and draped something over her.

Edward chuckled quietly. "I love you as well, Bella." He wrapped his arms around the blanket he'd carefully placed over her. Very quietly, he began to hum her lullaby, watching as she drifted from this reality to the unknown dreams that awaited her. _I will love you always._

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Hope you like it.

I got the distinct impression that Jacob more than anyone was pressing Bella to chose him (just my POV, I guess), and I wanted to write something where she finally made her decision known, without any hint of a doubt, to her dad. I don't know how this turned out.

R+R please, all comments are appreciated.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Tenshi


	17. Longing

**TriGemini** - Yeah, I know. It bothered me when Charlie kept pushing Bella, and so did Jacob. I wanted to do a chapter where she finally just said enough was enough and said it all plainly and clearly.

**JuseaPeterson** - Not so much the end, as it's just left off here until I run out of a muse. LOL. But I didn't even think of the last chapter I put up, as it fit an ending chapter. LOL I'm glad you liked it, but it's not necessarily the end. LOL. As this chapter proves.

**Link's Ocarina Babe** - I know. I hated all the back and forth, and though I can understand Charlie's take, I hated him and Jacob both pushing Team Jacob. To me, I'm a huge Team Edward fan, so... My stories might be a little biased. I know, I hated indecision, too, but loved the books.

**.** - Glad you liked it. :)

I have so many stories in the works for Twilight, and I could post one or two chapters from any of them. But I don't know which ones. Here are a following rough summaries, let me know if there's one that strikes your fancy? Keep in mind these are only working titles.

**The Path -** Bella Swan lives in Forks Washington with her Police Chief father, Charlie Swan. Every day, she walks to school via a path through the woods. It's same old, same old, and she often wishes something interesting would happen to her. One day, she meets a mysterious stranger on the path, and unknowingly gets her wish. Who is he and what does he want? More importantly, _what_ is he?

**Twilight Goes to Silent Hill** - Bella experiences a strange dream, and nearly dies because of it. Curiosity peaked, she decided to do a little research on Silent Hill, which leads her to going on quite possibly the most dangerous trip of her life. Can the Cullens save her? Can they save themselves?

**Bella's Diary** - Ever wonder what Bella was thinking through Twilight? Sure you get a good portion of her thoughts, but have you ever wanted to look into her diary on her personal thoughts? Edward/Bella

I have more, but these are the ones I have the strongest muse for.

**Note** : Huh, this one hit me out of the blue, so I decided to give it a shot.

**Book** : After Breaking Dawn

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**(Bella's POV)**

Looking to the sleeping face of my darling little girl, I bit my lip as my eyes dropped to my forever flat stomach. My hands ran over it gently, and I felt the familiar longing course through my body. Luckily, Edward and the boys had gone on a hunting trip, as I'd taken to getting used to leaving my shield down around him. It got easier all the time. The shield thing, that is. The longing... It only seemed to get harder.

It was a powerful sense of longing I'd only recently begun to feel. It was borne of something lost to me, only a short time ago.

_I'm a vampire now._ I didn't regret it for a moment. If I had to go back and do this all over again... Well, sure, I'd change a few things. For instance, I'd have pointed out the possibility of a paper cut at my birthday, so I wouldn't get hurt, and I'd fight harder to keep Edward with me... My point is, in the end, I'd still have kept my baby girl and my change.

No, what I longed for...only the girls of the family could understand.

I shot Renesmee another look, watching as her eyes darted back and forth under her lids, even as she curled tighter into her aunt Rosalie's arms. I didn't even realize it when I let out a small sad sigh.

I didn't realize it, but the others did.

Rosalie's head turned towards me, her eyes flickering with confusion, before an instant understanding shot through them. "Don't even _think_ about it!" She warned lowly, though her expression was far from hostile. "This is why I didn't want this for you." When I raised an eyebrow and remained quiet, she snorted and carefully shifted her grip so she could reluctantly hand Nessie over to Alice, who had a knowing look in her eyes. "You think I don't recognize that sigh?"

Looking to Esme and Alice, I saw small sad smiles on their faces, and realized they all knew what I was going through. Perhaps even better than I did. "But I don't regret changing."

"You regret leaving your humanity behind." Rose flipped her blonde hair out of her face as she folded her arms over her chest and turned towards me.

Shaking my head, I gave a small laugh. "No, Rose. I don't." Now they all looked confused and a little uncertain, as if they were all questioning either my sanity, or if they had read my sigh wrong. I decided to clear the air. "I regret leaving my _life_ behind. I miss my mom and dad, and all my friends at school. I miss eating and sleeping." My mind flashed with images of the undeniable joy I felt at times, when I found out I was pregnant with Renesmee, despite everything going on around me. _My miracle baby._

"I don't miss my _humanity._ I don't miss falling on my face, or turning beet red at Emmett's jokes. I don't miss being fragile and aging and getting sick or hurt. I don't miss being a great big 'Come Bite Me' sign for vampires-" I paused at the laughs my speech had gotten so far, smiling a little. "Or a big "Vampire Sympathiser' sign for werewolves, and I don't miss being powerless to protect the ones I love."

"If you had to do it over again-"

"I wouldn't change a thing." I gave Esme a firm look. "I have an amazing family, a beautiful, miraculous baby girl, and the man of my dreams. This is... This is me. This is what I wanted and I don't regret it." I shot Rosalie a look, when I saw her staring at me in disbelief. "You're right, though. There _is_ something I regret. I regret not being able to do it over again."

Rose and Esme frowned in confusion a moment, but Alice began to smile widely. Her eyes sparkled with tears of joy. "You want to give Edward another baby."

Rosalie's eyes cleared and she sighed. It was the same sigh I'd sighed only moments before. Getting up, she walked over to the couch I was sitting on, and sat next to me. She placed a hand over her stomach. "Welcome to the family." It was both bitter and happy. "This is part of being what you are. We've had to live with it for generations, but Bella.. You've got a little girl."

Esme nodded and took my hands from my other side, where she sat. "Don't waste your time regretting what you've lost. You can't go back, and you can't ever get it back. You need to spend your time looking to the present." She smiled lovingly at the little baby shifting in Alice's arms. "You have a stunning little girl over there. She's going to age and grow up."

Alice grinned. "Do what we're doing. Spend your time loving and spoiling her. She's here now."

I nodded, even as the feeling of longing only seemed to grow. "I just know... He'd love another child."

"He can adopt or get used to it." Rose was growling a little, but she sighed and her eyes softened. "You gave him a baby no one could have expected. You survived the birth, in a sense, and you've given him a family. It's more than any of us can ever give our mates." Her look turned jealous, but she masked it quickly.

"But don't you see? You've given your mates all of you." I frowned. "They know how much you love them, and it's obvious they love you too. If you don't believe me, you need to get sappy with each other and have Jazz channel the love into the whole house." I grinned at the giggle Alice let slip. "Even if they don't have kids, there's nothing to say you can't adopt when you're ready. It's not the same, I know..."

Rose sighed a little and leaned against me. "But it's something. Emmett and I have been talking about it. I just want a baby of my own _so_ badly." Her eyes glazed as she looked at Renesmee.

"I know." I nodded. "And if I could, I'd give you that ability, happily." I looked at Alice and Esme. "All of you. You've done nothing but support me in all this, I just wish there was more I could do for you."

"You gave us a new little sister." Alice smiled as she nudged a waking Renesmee and cooed at her.

Esme nodded. "You gave us a daughter and completed this family." She reached out around me and wrapped her arm around my waist.

Rosalie got up and went over to Nessie, playing with the little balled up fist before smiling at me. "You gave us a niece."

"And grand-daughter." A masculine voice cut in from the doorway.

I jumped a little and turned to find the boys standing in the doorway. Jasper's eyes filled with pain when he turned my way, and he smiled a little before turning and going to his mate. He cradelled Alice in his arms, like she was a fragile piece of glass, and cooed at Nessie with a warm smile. "You gave us love and happiness." He added, before kissing Alice's cheek.

Emmett went over and joined Rosalie, pulling her against him. He placed a chaste kiss to the top of her head and grinned at me. "You're still giving us a constant source of amusement."

I growled, even as embarrassment flooded my system and Jasper laughed.

"Careful, son, she's still stronger than you." Carlisle walked over and leaned over the back of the couch Esme and I were sitting on, to wrap his arms around her chest and pull her back against the back of the couch. With a kiss to her cheek, he turned to me. "Bella, You've given us hope."

Finally, I felt a pair of arms lifting me off the couch and turned instinctually into the familiar, warm embrace. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I felt Edward's lips press against my own, even as he hummed thoughtfully at where my thoughts had gone. "Why don't we let Rose feed Nessie and head out to the cottage?" He was smiling against my lips, and his eyes were a warm honey brown.

I nodded, getting the tenor of what he was thinking, even as Emmett laughed and made a raucious comment that I ignored and Edward growled at. Silently, we sped out of there, and within moments, we were practically knocking the door of our cottage down and racing towards the master bedroom. As I was placed gently on the bedsheets, I looked up to see Edward's loving stare as he seemed once again intent on visually memorizing every plane of my face.

"Love... I heard what you said." He smiled softly. "I'm already the happiest man existing. You gave me a _family_. A family of my own. A stunning wife and a beautiful daughter." He grimaced. "And some day a hairy mutt of a son-in-law who named our daughter after a sea serpent."

I giggled hysterically, having to cover my mouth to keep from ruining his speech, even though he was laughing as well.

Shaking his head, his eyes bored into my own, making my breath catch in my throat. It still got me that although I'd been a vampire for months, he always seemed to take my breath away. I didn't mind it though, since now I knew I could give as good as I got. Even as I thought that, I watched as his breathing seemed to hitch and realized I'd forgotten to put up my shield.

He took a moment and then shook his head. "Bella, my love. You've already given me more than I ever could have hoped, or ever thought I deserved." He smiled widely, happily. "You gave me life."

With that sincere declaration, I felt the longing fade, just a little bit, and my love grow impossibly stronger. _What did I ever do to deserve such a perfect creature in my life?_ I wondered as I gently traced a hand through his hair and down the side of his face.

Edward smiled. "I often wonder the same thing, love." With that, he leaned down and covered my mouth with his own, stalling whatever thoughts I might have had, and turning the topic to more interesting places.

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Hope you like it.

R+R please.

Thank you.

Tenshi


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